Monthly Archives: February 2020

20200221 – Cinema And Ice Hockey


Friday

Off snowshoeing, gorgeous blue sky day but cold. What can you expect.

Then after lunch, it’s pickleball for me and Christian centre for Wendy.

The evening includes some wine and my new Whiskey – Legacy – wow it’s under $20, has a score of 86 points, and is so very mellow.

Wendy and I try the various country’s nationality tests. Here are the results:

USA We both pass and could become US citizens

Australia We both pass and could become Australian citizens

UK Only I pass, Wendy fails and would not be eligible for UK citizenship. Mind you when you look at the bizarre questions you do start to wonder about their relevance.

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Front page news on the Times.

Michael O’Leary, the chief executive of Ryanair, has said that Muslim men should be profiled at airports because “that is where the threat is coming from”.

In an interview with The Times, the businessman said that if the tactic were deployed to prevent terrorism, it would “generally be males of a Muslim persuasion” who were flagged.

Mr O’Leary, 58, criticised existing airport security and said that checks for families should be less stringent as “the chances [they] are going to blow them all up is zero”.

The comments were condemned by charities and an MP, who accused him of Islamophobia and stoking racism.

How can saying something that is factually correct, obvious, logical and just plain common sense be racist or Islamophobic? I strongly agree with him. My life is being put at increased risk due to these snowflake-inspired policies. They should be targeting all of their resources on the highest risk and by not doing so are increasing the chances of a jihadi getting through.

Ask yourself this. If there were two identical flights, one with current screening and one with profile screening, which would you prefer to get on? I rest my case.


Saturday

Wendy and I go for a walk around Willow Creek, she walks on the hardpack and I snowshoe in the deep snow. Well it may only be two miles but I’m exhausted. One of those very rare occaisions when Wendy walks faster than me. I did this yesterday and wasn’t anywhere near as exhausted as I am today.

Costco walk in freezer.

Drive down to Salt Lake for our Costco trip. Pick up from R&R some ribs for me and brisket for Wendy’s tea. They’re amazing, I can’t finish all mine.

We should have been going to a basket ball game with Mike and Laurrie but it was a sellout. Instread we settle for some TV. Sadly it’s a no alcohol day.

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Sunday

Had a walk down to Kimble Junction, all of the 3 miles on the hardpacked farm trail.

In the evening we live like locals with a night out at the library cinema to watch “just mercy”. Just $7 and bring your own bowl for popcorn. Every shape and type of bowl you can imagine, but we are not that local. Alas no wine on sale tonight. Perhaps it’s because it’s Sunday. Strange these Mormon ways. There advice is to smuggle your own in. I’m sure there’ll be some sort of religious commandments against this enshrined in those gold plates. 

R&R for the second best ribs ever.

What a cracking good film. A modern day “Kill a Mocking Bird”. Is Alabama still like that?

Best of all about going to the pictures in America is the crazy clapping during and at the end. Bizarre. They can’t hear you. Like the true snow flakes who dreamed it up have they never heard of jazz hands. So much more politically correct and so less offensive to those with hearing problems or are stressed out by clapping.

On the positive side at least they don’t stand up. Next time we go I’m going to sit on the front row, at the end I’m going to stand up to see how many lemmings follow suit.


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Monday

A somewhat cold grey day. Catch the bus up to fresh market and the bank and then walk back down the farm Trail. The wind is so cold but what can you expect it is a ski resort. It’s about a 3 mile walk along the hardpacked snowy path.

Ice Hockey Utah finals.

Then the afternoon is pickle ball for me and shopping for Wendy. Followed by a quick shower and turn around as we head off to Barbara and Steve‘s for dinner. Then on to watch the Utah high school ice hockey State finals. It’s a great game in a majestic stadium, with good company, and all for the amazing price of $3. Yet another great day here in paradise. 

Park City Miners High School win the state championship. Now they’re off to Dallas for the American finals. Well done.



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20200217 – Paradise. Sunny And Cold -8C. Awesome.


Monday

Wake to a glorious sunny day and fresh powder.

Lazy morning followed by a trip to bank and the Christian centre. Then in the afternoon I’m off to the Basin Rec to play my first game of pickleball. Played terribly, slapped so many out of bounds. Must be the altitude. I really must stop hitting them so hard.

Evening is watching TV. Set up to get UK TV via our Apple TV.
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View from our condo.

Well now we’re back in paradise it’s time to plan my awesome typical week:

Monday – PM Pickleball.
Tuesday – AM snowshoe, PM gun club.
Wednesday – PM Pickleball.
Thursday – AM snowshoe.
Friday – PM Pickleball.
Saturday – AM snowshoe or walk with Wendy.
Sunday – AM Gym, PM snowshoe or walk with Wendy.

Wendy’s schedule

Wednesday – Christian centre all day.
Friday – PM Christian centre.


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Tuesday

Sunny again but oh so cold. Lazy morning and then I go for a pickleball lesson.

In the evening we go round to Laurrie and Mike’s for dinner. We were supposed to be going to Samies for dinner but surprise, surprise Laurrie’s prepared White Castles, what treat. So good to see them again and catch up. We laighed so much our sides ached. An awesome evening.

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Wednesday

After another lazy start I set off to try out my new snowshoes. Just 3 miles but in soft snow it’s quite a good workout, sunny but oh so cold – minus 8C. I always thought skiing was a great calorie burner but it turns out that:

Calories burnt per hour

Ski. 532
Snowshoe. 710
Pickleball. 600
Walking 211
Hiking 430

The afternoon is more pickleball, but after my snowshoe workout, I settle for just an hour.

In the evening we meet up with Carol and Angela for dinner at the Windy Ridge Cafe as Hal is in agony with sciatica. Then it’s back home for more wine and TV.

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I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my bucket list. Well at least in my case everywhere civilised is.


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Thursday

Yet more sunshine.

Lazy morning then I go to the gunclub, sign up for a month and have 100 rounds of 9mm out of my favourite weapon, the Wilson Combat.

Then it’s back home for a 3 mile walk with Wendy and of course a trip to a supermarket.

In the evening we try our luck with the UK citizenship test. I pass, Wendy fails. The questions are so perverse. Then we try the USA and Australian tests and pass both. The Australian one is more a common-sense test. Says so much about the crazy UK test.
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Decided on our winter holiday for next year. As we want a long term stay we have to plan well ahead before places get booked up. Yes, we’re coming back to PC for 79 dyas – huraah. Negotiated a good deal with our current landlady for this place. So much cheaper than the majority of similar places. It’s nice, well equiped, comfortable and a good location – although we miss all our Racquet club friends.


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20200213 – Dive, Dive, Dive. Goodbye Orlando. Hello Park City


Thursday

Lazy morning then off to Disney springs. Used to be called Downtown Disney by I suppose the marketing geeks decided that wasn’t sexy enough. A pleasant stroll around, I sit and watch the world go by while Wendy forages in the Disney store. Thankfully she comes out without any Disney gift cards – private joke – nor any gifts for the kids. My credit card breathes a sigh of relief. Then while we have a Starbucks a choir strikes up to entertain us.

Head out to Disney Celebration to pick up a Stromboli. Can you believe it? The Stromboli place has run out of meat. I walk out in disgust. The server is gob smacked and doesn’t know how to deal with it. Settle for a Reubens and Wendy for a chicken flat bread, obviously from a different restaurant.

Back to our suite for our tea, ginger beer and Netflix.

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Police have been urged to rewrite the rules on hate crime after a judge likened a force to the Gestapo over its handling of a businessman who tweeted about transgender people.

Mr Justice Julian Knowles warned yesterday that Britain was in danger of slipping into an Orwellian society after Harry Miller, 55, was visited by officers at work and told that his tweets would be recorded as a “non-crime hate incident”.

He was investigated by a community cohesion officer who claimed that he was in danger of breaking the law. Mr Miller said that the officer had told him: “I’m here to check your thinking.” The tweets included a limerick about transgender people and one saying: “I was assigned mammal at birth but my orientation is fish. Don’t mis-species me.”


Friday

Disney Dive Quest with this mangy teethed individual.

Very lazy morning watching the rain.

After lunch we take a stroll around Old Town Kissimmee, an American Blackpool without fish and chips or “Kiss Me Quick” hats – no MAGA hats either.

Then I’m off to Epcot for the Disney Quest Dive at Epcot. Well at least I would be if my SATNAV could find Epcot.

Amorous Ray that keeps bumping into me.

Must be the third time I’ve done this dive. As I get older it’s more my sort of dive, everything laid out for you; just 25 feet deep; plenty of pretty coral; not too cold; two dive masters in attendance; good gear and very safety conscious; best of all plenty of awesome fish including sharks and stingrays. Have trouble at first as my STAB vest is underweight so I can’t sink to the bottom. Thankfully one of the dive master has some extra weights. After that its all good. Best to just knell on the bottom and let the fish come to you. A pretty amorous Cowtail Sting Ray keeps fiddling up to me, turns out it’s fed on a black tray and therefore associates my black wet suit with food. Amazing having sharks and rays just swimming up to you, under you and over you.

Another one of the amazing creatures.

Only downside to diving is going deaf, well more deafer than usual, for the next few days and the horrible taste of salty fish pee. Never mind a hot chocolate, seems the staple drink after all dives, soon gets rid of that.

Pick Wendy up and take her for a Valentines Day meal at the Olive Garden. Hang on there’s a one our wait. Forget it we’re not that romantic and settle for a Subway. Mind you there is only one kid serving and she’s slower than molasses on a cold day. 25 minutes later we have our Subway, sans Tomato because they’ve run out and anyway she doesn’t know how to pronounce it.

More sharks.

By now I’m that hungry I could eat a fried grizzly bear fur sandwich. To top it all the shortcut backroad to our hotel is blocked off by a Sheriff – god only knows why and he won’t split. Finally after an hour out foraging for food we get sat down to enjoy a Subway with an excess of Jalepenos that will set my arse on fire tomorrow and some very mediocre Mertlot that would be great at stripping the mould off my deck.

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Saturday

Our new home for the next 8 weeks.

Tackle the early morning door slammers and shouting in the corridors. Turns out two of the offenders are teachers. Give them a Victor style meltdown. No wonder the kids have no respect for others if this is the example they set. Should be ashamed of themselves.

Very lazy morning with a late checkout at 13:00. Our flights not into 18:40. Check-in is smooth. TSA pre-checked. Flights on time, boarding is a tad slow, they seem to board at random – Jet Blue.

I have the pleasure of being sat next to some boobs on legs. She certainly flaunts them and any moment they could escape from there scanty cladding, or worse still a catastrophic costume failure. I can’t even look out the window without being confronted by them.

Lounge

Nearly 5 hours flying to Salt Lake but lands on time. Hertz are a tad disappointing as their free President circle upgrade choice has no big SUVs like normal. But I suppose it’s only to be expected on Presidents weekend. At least the manager has picked out a brand new Malibu with low MPG, well at least low by American standards, but I can choose any of the other salons, including another Mustang. Go with the manager’s choice.

Fortunately, it’s not snowing so the drive up to park city is not too bad.

Arrive about 23:00 and our condo is great, modern, well equipped and bright, yes it even has plenty of lights although, like most American homes, no central ceiling light. Think we’ll be very comfortable here.

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Last day for waffles as we leave today. Can’t say I’ll be sorry to go. I’ve had enough of the hustle, bustle and traffic of Orlando. Looking forward to the laid back life of Park City. Back to Pickleball, snowshoeing, hiking, biking, shooting and good friends.


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Watching Wendy shop it’s like watching the handmaids tale, slower than a pregnant nun going to confession.


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Why is most hotel wifi as useless as a bucket with no bottom. Keeps dropping out and then almost impossible to reconnect. Can you begin to imagine what it would be like if the electricity and water in a hotel behaved like that? At least they’d have no repeat customers. Well we will not be coming back.


Sunday

Early morning view from our lounge.

Snowing all day today. First task is over to Janelle’s to pick up our stuff. Then Hal and Carol come round and drop off our clotheswe’d left here.

Then joy of joy it’s the supermarket and Starbucks.

Bob and Marilyn invite us round for dinner. Wine at last and an amazing Lasagne. Pick up my bottle of Mid Winter Night Dram, it’s awesome.
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Wow so glad to be back in paradise. It’s snowing but even that’s enjoyable. 8 weeks here, how lucky can we be.


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Another example of the glut of American cushions and pillows in our new home.


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Master bedroom.

Yet let us review the ways in which Islamic jihad and Sharia pose a danger to various groups who typically consider themselves liberal:

Why is islam, jihad and sharia a threat to ?

* Islam is a threat to Christians, for it mandates that they must either convert to Islam, submit to Islamic hegemony, and be killed – the same triple choice offered to the Jews. The Christian communities of the Middle East, some of which dated back to the time of Christ, were decimated, as jihad groups targeted Christians wholesale as symbols of the hated U.S. and West. 
* Islam is a threat to secular liberals, because although noting the fact will get one dismissed as a “far-right” “Islamophobe,” Islam really does have doctrines mandating the conquest and subjugation of non-Muslims, and the major Muslim organizations in the United States really do behave as if they would like nothing better than the weakening and ultimate downfall of the U.S. government and free society, by opposing virtually all counterterror initiatives; polarizing American society by claiming falsely that Muslims are the victims of large-scale persecution and harassment in the U.S.; and stigmatizing all those who call attention to the jihad threat and the devastation wrought in Europe by mass Muslim migration as “racists” and “hatemongers.”

Nothing like a good screw. Never seen an Archimedes screw before.

* Islam is a threat to secular Muslims, because many have come to the West as a refuge from Sharia, and now the oppression they left behind in their home countries has followed them to their new homes. Islam in all its traditional and classic formulations mandates a death penalty for someone who is sane, adult and leaves Islam voluntarily. This discourages apostasy, obviously, but it also makes for untold numbers of silent apostates who live outwardly as Muslims while dissenting inwardly. Islamic hardliners target these people, when they find them, no less than they target open apostates. 

20200209 – Mickey Mouse Towm


Sunday

Lovely sunny day. Drive up to Dunedin after the usual lazy morning. It’s a buzzing place. Last night we went to dinner there and the place was hopping, livelier than Clitheroe on a Saturday night, but alas despite the balmy evening scantily class wrenches were a tad rarer.

Wendy has her usual lunch on the pier s as we watch pelicans scooping up minnows into their amazing expanding chins.

Have a leisurely stroll around in hope of finding a cafe for coffee. No chance they’re all restaurants full of excess adipose tissue stuffing themselves to accumulate more.

Sit around the pool when we get back, but soon flew indoors as it’s just too hot. How anyone copes with Florida in summer I’ll never know.

Just the thing for rocking tables, every restaurant should have them.

Don’t I just love watching Curb Your Enthusiasm with Lary David, America’s Victor Meldrew. He comes out with some amazing rants that I can truly associate with. Like Rocking tables in cafes and restaurants and how difficult it is to get money out of pockets when in the car – hence traffic light beggers will never get rich.

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Sick of passwords and the daily grind of remembering them, waiting for a one-time passcode and a plethero of other strategies designed to drive us all nuts. I wouldn’t mind but to have then for a trivial web site like donkey sanctuaries just takes the carrot.


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Trump is so right. Who in their right mind would trust this lying barbaric 7th century islamic regime where lying to infidels is mandated in the quran.


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Watched question time it seems tame and boring now BREXIT is over. Whatever happened to the excitement and passion, the outbursts, rants and raves. Never mind at least over here we have the excitement and pantomime of impeachment followed by the election of a president. How do the Americans cope with 18 months of this nonsense every four years?


Monday

Another gorgeous sunny day.

Drive up to Honeymoon island state park. Visit the nature centre and discover why it’s called honeymoon island. At last we get to have a coffee and then a pleasant stroll along the beach. Then sat like two old dears on a swing just watching the world go by. Who knows perhaps one day we’ll even come and spend a day sat on the beach – I doubt it.

Supermarket for our tea then it’s an alcohol free evening watching Netflix.


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I think that we should make change immigration laws:

If any family arrive they should consider them selves welcome “guests” for three generations. They should have all benefits and citizenship as now, but administratively the family must demonstrate loyalty and support for their new home. Over three generations, disobeying the law, defrauding the taxpayer, or trying to kill the population should automatically result in expulsion and return to the original land, for all the family.

This will concentrate minds, and assist mum’s and dads of “lovely children”, and communities, increase support for the British state, and for its values.


Tuesday

Our hotel.

Depart our home exchange and drive up to Orlando for 4 nights. Home exchange was comfortable and clean, the only downside was a decrpit kitchen, not a handle on doors or drawers, and the outside needed some tender loving care. At least we had 10 days at zero cost.

Tonight’s tea along with some scallops. But those rubber bands need some sauce on them and some extra time cooking.

Takes us about 90 minutes to get to our Comfort Suite hotel in Kissimmee. Very comfortable suite and well situated.

Have a leisurely coffee around the pool and get talking to an American couple from Atlanta, both ardent Trump fans. Have a pleasant afternoon putting the World to rights. Amazing how similar their problems are.

Go to the Red Lobsster for dinner. Just love obster but so much better having it prepared for you rather than having a whole lobster and having to excavate the green gunge inside yourselve.

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Boris Johnson faces a legal fight to keep terrorists locked up after Labour’s Shami Chakrabarti and civil rights groups today hinted they could challenge an emergency law to stop terrorists being automatically released. Bloody snowflakes strike again.


Wednesday

At lasts a waffle for breakfast, not just any waffle but a Mickey Mouse waffle and to top it all they’re made for you. Although there is something quite rewarding in mastering the waffle machine and cooking your own breakfast. Mastery of a waffle machine should be a mandatory element of any American citizen test, along with mastery of a giant gas barbecue.

Drive down to Hollywood Studios. The only reason we’re calling in at Disney is to truly brass my kids off by going to see the Star Wars Park. They’re 30+year old Star Wars geeks. Going to Disney without a rug rat seems almost bizarre, it’s a wonder don’t have a Rent A Rug Rat counter at the entrance to all their theme parks for all the old saddos with no kids with them.

Hot, busy, clean and impressive. Catch a few of the shows and manage to get a free Fastpass into the Toy Story shooting ride, thanks to a kind attendant who obviously took pity on these two poor old dears who allegedly had no idea what a Fastpass was.

Finally, get to the Star Wars land, busy but not overly so. Amazing that I manage to get on the Millenium Falcom Smugglers run ride with only a 15-minute wait by joining the Singles line. Wendy gives it a miss, which given the roughness of the simulator ride was a smart move. The ride is just short enough to avoid you having to shout for Huey or Ruth, and still keep my breakfast.

An impressive new land. The attention to detail is amazing and although there are only two rides there is a lot going on.

Watch a Frozen Singalong – how sad is that. The woman next to me is orgasmic, more moves than a belly dancer, waving arms and body, singing along to the songs, trying to encourage her 5-year-old who has her head in her hands in disgust at her Mothers behavior.

At last, a leisurely coffee and some people watching. Orlando, the blobby capital of America, a magnet for excess adipose tissue. It’s quite depressing. More blobbies than good bacteria in a fat gut. Interesting how one of the family has an excess of adipose tissue then the rest of the family seems to suffer the same. The biggest threat here is being run down by a blobby in their electric dodgem.

Tea tonight is a Taco Bell at long last. Alas very disappointing, I think Taco Bell will no longer be top of my Junk Food list.

After 48 years of marriage has it come to this?



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Ideal weapon for jihadis.


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One in the eye for all the Remoaners and doubters:

Britain had the third-fastest growing economy in the G7 group of advanced nations last year even though it stagnated in the final quarter.

Official figures show that the economy beat expectations to grow by 1.4 per cent last year. The UK outperformed France, Germany and Italy, which grew by 1.3 per cent, 0.5 per cent and 0.2 per cent respectively.

According to the Office for National Statistics (ONS), growth picked up to 0.3 per cent in December alone. The annual 1.4 per cent growth rate meant that Britain was behind only the US and Canada, which posted growth of 2.2 per cent and 1.5 per cent respectively.

Oh yea of little faith in your country.

Nothing like a good screw. First time I’vs ever seen an Archimedes spiral. I bet you’re all orgasmic.

20200205 – Beaches, Dinner With Friends, Shooting And Kayaking


Wednesday

Treasure Island beach.

Early start as I’m off to Pickleball. Alsas get to the sports centre, 6 pickleball courts but no one there. Abandon hope of playing pickleball today.

After lunch, we set off to Sand Key Park and the beach. Wendy sets foot in the sea, so brave, only a paddle. Too cold for me. Nice beach but not really our cup of tea so we have a stroll along the beach with a view to having a coffee in one of the nice hotels. Sadly there’s a river in the way so no coffee.

In the evening we drive over to Joe and Donna’s (friends from PC who live in Oldsmar) then we all set off for dinner at Southern Fresh in Safety Harbour for dinner. Awesome pork dish, just how I like it, the slightly burned outside and plenty of it.

Finally, we finish watching Succession. Another one that I hope they don’t do another season, it really has started to lose the warring family plot.

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I’m so sick of passwords, crap software written by 10 year olds who are probably incapably of tying their shoelaces and this daft obsession with “click to accept cookies” (driven by more obsessive data laws from the EU).


Thursday

Wendy braves a paddle.

Lazy morning. Just the excitement of a supermarket trip.

After lunch I drive over to Joes and we go shooting. Bizarre they need to see my ESTA before they can let me shoot. Supposedly federal law, not that they seem to bother in Utah. Good choice of guns. Love Joe’s standard 9mm, same as the Park City gun, and even more accurate. 1911 combat style 45 is awesome, easy to shoot, flattering and pleasing accuracy results. Not as big a kickback as I expected, but wow what a mizzle flash. As for the small 380, god only knows where the dum dum bullets went, shattered my good shooting performance.

Lunch stop.

Sushi for tea and then Netflix. We’ve seen all we want to see on HBO so will be cancelling my free 7 dya trial.

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Friday

Safety Harbour.

Lazy and frustrating morning trying to cancel Wendy’s Santander account. Major password issues; usual crap software; poor HCI; then to top it all won’t let me transfer all of my funds out. After an hour and accepting my transfer request, I’m told “not allowed” to contact us. Then to be told we’ll have to go into the branch to do the transfer. So much for an online banking site. As you can probably imagine I’m madder than a Taliban trying to cross the street during a gay pride parade. After kicking off I finally get through to the security department, who after the third batch of inane security questions do the transfer, but I have to go into the branch to close the account. That’s their loss then they can continue to service a zero balance account.

Safety Harbour

After lunch we take a drive down to Safety Harbour. Have a pleasant stroll around a lovely little town. Stop off for a Starbucks, really have gone off Starbucks just lately. Their coffee always seems a tad bitter or burnt. The only good news is the consistency, but give me Volcano coffee range any day.

Come across a sandwich shop and get a classic Reubens with a double dose of corned beef. US corned beef is nothing like our fat globuled version, it’s more like pastrami. At last I get an awesome Reubens for my tea, I’ve been mithering for one ever since we arrive, the haute cuisine of American junk food.

After more battling the technology I get my Smart DNS working, it seems that software has it in for me today, and get to watch Silent Witness on BBC.

Safety Harbour



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Saturday

Kayaking at Tarpon Springs Bayou.

Leisurely morning as usual.

Kayaking at Tarpon Springs Bayou.

Drive up to Tarpon Springs to go kayaking with Joe and Donna in these see-through kayaks. More like a canoe and as the water is so murky there really isn’t much benefit to them. Get to see Manatee snouts as they surface for air and a couple of Dolphins. Awesome weather clear blue sky, no breeze and warm. Wendy goes for a stroll around Tarpon Springs whilst we’re all on the water. Alas no really much there to see.

Kayaking at Tarpon Springs Bayou.

In the evening we meet up with Joe and Donna for dinner at the Lucky Lobster Co in Dunedin – not really that lucky considering how much lobster we eat. Great food, great company, and the wine wasn’t too bad. Finally, get to have some scallops as well as a lobster roll. They were delicious.

Back home we sample yet another white wine. This time it’s a Muscato, so sweet it makes your eyes water. Not to my liking, but Wendy likes it.
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Gorgeous sunsets from Clearwater Beach. Alas not one of my photos as we missed the opportunity last night.


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20200201 – BREXIT At Last, New Home Exchange And Mermaids


Saturday

BREXIT at last.


Leisurely drive up to Clearwater. Encounter our first traffic jam on the interstate. Mainly caused by scrots wanting to cut in at the last moment. Seems to be a world wife problem.

Our pool.

Easily find our new home exchange and settle in. All very roomy and comfortable – see pictures. Then it’s the almost daily trip to the supermarket for tea. Sushi tonight, expensive but we’re worth it.

Lounge.

As if we don’t have enough to watch on Netflix we sign up for yet another free seven day trial of HBO. I’m nearly out of unused email addresses. There are quite a few things worth watching on it and at $15 a month it’ll be worth it while we’re here.

In this home we have two pianos; two surfboards; two guitars; two coffee machines; an X box and loads of games; more cushions than Muslim fundamentalists at a stoning; and a foot operated singer sewing machine, but no hairdryer and no kettle. It’s a nice home but none of the kitchen drawers or cupboards have handles on them. How bizarre is that?

Master bedroom.

This home exchanging lark gives you an interesting view on how other people live. You come across some bizarre ways. Teaches you to accept how others live.

It has two bedrooms, just one bathroom – no en-suite and only a single sink. How will we cope?

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“To mark a moment in history.” So said the bbc on the so-called BREXIT celebration programme. What a remoaner disgrace it was. One of the most significant events in our recent history and all they can do is bring out a few boring talking heads. Meanwhile in parliament square good old Nigel is hosting a rave celebration, but oh don’t let’s show that, people might actually think BREXIT was popular and a good thing. ITV weren’t any better.

Meanwhile in Downing Street, Boris couldn’t even be bothered to open the front door and say a few rousing words. Nor did the Queen pop out onto the balcony and give a dignified wave.

Our 1776 moment. Our Independence Day and the remoaner controlled media just can’t be bothered. Poor losers. No doubt they’ll be doing everything they can to hinder success. It’s a national disgrace.


Sunday

Pier 60 Clearwater Beach.

Yeah, it’s Super Bowl, haven’t a clue who is playing and not that I’ll be watching it. Don’t really understand it. Wathing the adverts and half time interval can be fun in hope that there’s yet another nipple exposing wardrobe failure.

Pier 60 marina.

Lazy morning as usual. Then we drive down to Pier 60 on Clearwater beach, rated number 1 beach in America, with pristine clean white sand. Pier was nothing much to write home about, but it’s a lively area and although a tad cool breeze and only 60F it was lovely to stroll around with the sun on you and clear blue skies. A very American resort, no a single “kiss me quick” hat, candy floss or fish and chip shops. Of course no litter or graffiti.

Our home exchange for the next 10 days.

Then it’s the damn supermarket again for tea. My theme this week is seafood every night. Might as well whilst we’re on the coast. Will I survive tonight’s crab cakes. I survived the White Castles, no problem.

Evening in watching Succession about the most dysfunctional family you can ever imagine – they’re all crazier than a squirrel on crack. Sadly it’s a no-alcohol day.

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Started to watch season 10 of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Larry David is one of my heroes. The American Victor Meldrew. One classic scene tonight is him walking down the pavement and a young couple sticks a selfie stick in his path as they take a photo. He grabs it, snaps it and hands it back to them and carries on – awesome. How often have I felt like doing that? See picture.


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What is it with Americans who seem to think that any flat horizontal surface on a bed or settee needs to be smothered with pillows. We seem to spend the first hour in any new home getting rid of excess pillows, by which time we’re exhausted and ready for bed.


Monday

Mermaid at Weeki Watchee.

Another glorious sunny day and a lot warmer.

After our usual lazy start, we head up to Weeki Watchi State Park for the World famous mermaid show. I’ve always wanted to do this in Florida, but it has whole always been too far to travel. Anyway, after a hours driving with more traffic lights than there are pricks in a second-hand dart board,we finally get there.

It is a lovely State Park built around typical Florida Spring. We watch two mermaid shows, the first one is about the history of the show, the second is a little mermaid show a tad to twee for my liking. We also catch a park ranger presentation on snakes, gopher tortoise, and alligators. As usual with Ranger presentations, they are always very interesting and informative. Overall a great day out, made all the better by the gorgeous weather and to be fair even the mermaid shows well worth it.

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Today’s useless information.

Ranger talk.

A male Gopher tortoise has a concave underside. Why? So that it doesn’t fall off when procreating. Isn’t evolution amazing?


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Why is it that American women in supermarkets don’t seem to comprehend that you can steer a trolley around obstacles. Instead, they seem to expect you to move to avoid upsetting their straight-line trajectory.


Tuesday

Weeki Watchee spring.

Lazy start then we drive down to St Petersberg beach heard a lot about it. Well how disappointing it all is like a Spanish seaside resort, all big hotels and condos with little beach access and no real character or charm.

Treasure Island beach.

Stop at Treasure Island beach for Wendy’s lavish lunch and a stroll down to the sea. Then drive back up along the coast road, traversing all the islands. Not very inspiring. At least Clearwater Beach has something about it with a pier and a marina acting as a centre.

Watch Larry on Curb Your Enthusiasm followed by Succession – won’t be sad when this is over. Then watch the state of the union. It’s a pity we don’t have something similar in the UK. See jokes for comments below.

Oops.



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Don’t I just love the state of the union address. Great to watch those on the right clap their hearts out and bounce up and down like a tarts knickers. It’s almost like the soviet era where they’re all freightened to stop clapping. First to stop gets sent to a gulag / Guantanamo.

But best of all, them on the left all sat on their hands with sour puss faces and won’t even applaud the most sensible of items. Then you have the childish behaviour, Trump doesn’t shake hands with Nancy; Nancy fails to introduce him with respect; Nancy tares up his speech.


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Yet another islamic jihad just released from prison has been out on the rampage with a knife and attacked two innocent victims. Fortunately he has been shot dead.

It’s no us imprisoning them. It’s no use trying to de-radicalise them. Death penalty for any terrorist offence, it’s the only way to deal which such mad dogs.

As for his parents who claim he was a lovely child but prison made him an extremist, they seem to forget he was sent to prison for extremist terrorist offences. They must have known he was a threat and you’re obviously incompetent as parents.

How many murders in the name of this vile ideology, islam, have to happen before it becomes a banned organisation. The IRA is banned in the UK – and it killed nowhere near as many as this organisation in mainland Britain.

When will we learn? Smell the coffee before it’s too late.