Friday 25/9/26
Catch the train down to Euston and then across London to Heathrow terminal 5. How do people live in this infested dump, like rats in a cage. Catch one of the pods to the Thistle hotel. Certainly not up to one of our usual quality hotels. Like something out of the 1950’s Have a beer and wait for Brett to join me for dinner. Not the most inspiring of menus.
Saturday
Up at the crack of Sparrow fart and off to the Aspire lounge in terminal 5. As is typical with anything to do with that useless Dragon pass the receptionist doesn’t seem to have a clue what she’s doing, fannies around for 10 minutes, doesn’t even know her password, and to top it all we’re then not allowed in until 3 hours before our flights due to depart. Flying British Airways to Nairobi. Fortunately we’ve go carry on luggage so there’s little chance they will loose our luggage, but never say never when dealing with BA. Not a bad cattle class flight. We have a limousine waiting for us at Nairobi airpot which whisks us off to the Crown Plaza. Has to be one of the nicest Crown Plaza’s I’ve been in. As it late at night we have a quick snack and then off to bed. But amazed that we’re security screened to get into the hotel, a foretaste of what is to come in Nairobi.
Sunday
Up early for a guided walking tour around Nairobi. What a friendly place Nairobi is, I’ve had more friend request in the first hour than all my time on Facebook – will you be my friend. Everywhere has typical minimum, unarmed, security guards. Most of them nodding off or chatting with their girlfriend. Thank god that they’re not armed, minimum wage and guns do not mix well. Every public build ing you go in you’re screened, but they don’t seem to bother if the scanner goes off – so what’s the point. All the streets are a trip hazard. On the viewing platform on 30th floor they’re especially dangerous, with pipes and cowlings sticking up everywhere. Restaurants seem to have forgot the simplicity of a paper menu and replaced it with a “scan this code”. Sadly they don’t have WiFi that works so no menu. Vote with our feet. Try a cafe but no of them sell beer – is this a Mormon influence. Traffic is horrendous, no concept of personal space or safe stoping distance. 4 on a motor bike and Uber motor bikes. Fortunately Uber X is dirt cheap and efficient. Not much to see really, a lot of poverty and amazing how many people are walking down major roads. The very centre is quite modern. Let the picture tell the story. Trying to buy a pair of sunglasses, but being such a religious place (80% christian and 20% muslim) everywhere is closed. Finally drop lucky in a Carrefour in Galeria shoping. Ask security guard to undo the case to try on; select a pair; then he takes us to the front of a long queue and we’re promptly served. White man obviously still Bwana. Dinner at Carnivore an all meat restaurant. Every meat you can think of. Try two different kinds of testicles, very bland, and din’t taste like chicken. Back to hotel for a night cap.
This city is security mad. Every building has sleepy security guards, minimum wage, but fortunately not armed. If you go into an official building then it’s full airport style security screening. Mind you even though the scanner goes off they wave you through.
But the ultimate in batshit bonkers security has to be when you drive into the airport. You have to get out the car and go through airport style security, but when the scanner goes off they wave you through. Meanwhile the taxi drives through with your bomb ladened luggage. You then meet your taxi, complete with unscreened luggage, full of bombs, on the other side. In what universe or dimension does this make a skerrit of common sense.
Monday
Up early again and another great breakfast. Picked up by a limousine and whisked off to Wilson airport. An hours flight in a 12 seater Cessna to Governors camp. You have to crawl along the isle to get to your seat but bigger than I expected , at least we didn’t have to sit on the pilots lap. Very smooth flight. Have up a couple of pickups to make along the way. Stop off at two mud landing strips to pick up some people. Like a bus service. Amazing at one pickup some bloody arrogant Brit, who has been standing around for god knows how long, decides he needs to go to the toilet so keeps everyone waiting – worse than dealing with children. Arrive at Governors, all very well organised. Start with a briefing while luggage is taken to our tent. Escorted to tent, settle in and then have lunch on the outside lunch plaza. Catch our first Safari, 1530 to 1900 with stop for drinks and snacks. Pictures tell the story as to what we saw, amazing how many different animals and how many of them. Dinner in the restaurant, good news all the meal and drinks are free. Each tent has an allegedly safe drinking water tap. Buggered if I’m going to trust it, which means the only bottled alternative is sparkling water – oh well better than risking the “safe” water. Stagger back to our remote tent with a guide to protect us from any animals roaming the grounds. Is he armed, is he buggery, but he does have a stick, or is it a toothpick – that’ll be good against a lion, leopard or cheetah. Not seen anyone armed so far. Wot no rifle.
Some terrorist groups pose a threat in Nairobi/Kenya, the principal threat identified by Kenyan and UK authorities is al-Shabaab, the Somalia-based group affiliated with al-Qaeda. Kenya’s National Counter Terrorism Centre also identifies threats associated with ISIS/Islamic State, although al-Shabaab has been much more prominent in carrying out attacks in Kenya.
Nairobi has suffered major al-Shabaab attacks in the past, including Westgate Shopping Mall in 2013 and the DusitD2 complex in 2019. Current UK travel advice says there remains a heightened terrorism threat across Kenya and that attacks could potentially target hotels, restaurants, shopping centres, transport locations and other places frequented by foreigners.
That doesn’t mean Nairobi is currently under attack or that tourists should avoid Nairobi generally. The latest U.S. advisory places Kenya overall at Level 2 — Exercise Increased Caution, while its strongest warnings concern particular northeastern and coastal areas nearer Somalia rather than Nairobi.
If you’re asking because you’re in Nairobi now and have heard about a specific threat or incident today, tell me what you’ve heard or where you are heading and I’ll check the latest information.
Al-Shabaab’s central aim is political and territorial control, primarily in Somalia. It is an Islamist militant organization affiliated with al-Qaeda. Its stated objectives include overthrowing Somalia’s federal government, removing foreign/African Union forces, and establishing a state governed according to its own strict interpretation of Islamic law. Some elements have also promoted a broader “Greater Somalia” encompassing ethnic-Somali areas of neighbouring countries.
Why do they attack Kenya?
Kenya became particularly important to al-Shabaab after Kenyan forces entered Somalia in 2011 and subsequently participated in the African Union mission there. Al-Shabaab has explicitly used attacks in Kenya as retaliation and as an attempt to pressure Kenya to withdraw its forces.
There is also a wider ideological objective. Kenya’s National Counter Terrorism Centre says al-Shabaab rejects Kenya’s secular democratic system and seeks to undermine the Kenyan state, social cohesion and religious pluralism.
It’s important to distinguish al-Shabaab’s extremist interpretation of Islam from Islam generally. Kenyan counterterrorism authorities explicitly describe the group as manipulating religious concepts to justify political violence.
So, very simply: they want power and territory, the removal of governments and foreign forces they oppose, and the imposition of their extremist system of government. Terrorism is one of the methods they use to pursue those objectives.
The religion of pieces and permanent offence strike again.
Tuesday
Woken at 0545 with tea, coffee and biscuits. Noise from the jungle is amazing, all sorts including a baby crying! We’ve had a visit from an elephant during the night judging by the giant dollop of shit on the path. Then at 0630 we mount up for our first full days Safari, of course the only women, bubble head, on our Land Cruiser is 15 minutes late. It’s all so simple if they’re not there on time go without them. We’ve combined two safaris into one so have breakfast served on safari. Amazing the animals we see. Go back tp see the lions take into their breakfast, with full stereo sound. Pictures tell the story and the animals we saw. Back for lunch, loody cold soup again, and alcohol then relax outside our tent, Brett needs a nap, no stamina. Visited by the warthog and her family. Then 1530 it’s another afternoon safari, complete with drinks of our choice. See photos for animals etc. Dinner back at camp and then escorted back to our tent by a warrior with a toothpick – still no rifle.
Wednesday 2/9/26
Woken again with tea, coffee and biscuits. If we thought yesterday was early today it 0445 for a 0515 pickup to go on a balloon flight. One silly ignorant bitch turns up 20 minutes late, no apology – we should have just gone without her. Balloon flight is amazing. Can you believe we’re security screened before setting off. Terrorists are renowned for bombing balloons. The World has truly gone mad. It’s very windy and the flight is close to being cancelled, results in an 18 mile and hour landing, as we’re dragged and bounced along the ground. Thankful for seat belts and plenty of padding. We end up very shaken and upside down – see photos. Then we’re whisked off for a champagne full English breakfast in the bush. Back to camp for lunch and drinks ready for another safari. Amazing so far we’ve seen 3 out of the Big 5 (lion, elephant and buffalo). Finally get to see a Leopard along with about 12 other safari land cruisers – it’s like Piccadilly Circus and there’s a ranger there trying to protect the Leopard. Also get to see a cheetah, but alas no Rhino. Although we do get to see a Lion stalk a Zebra and then spends 10 minutes trying to bring it to the ground – apparently a very rare opportunity – see pictures and video. Amazing. Then it’s drinks and snacks on the safari. After a long day we’re back for a well earned wine and dinner. Retire with our usual escort.
Thursday
Have a lazy start as we’re flying home today. Breakfast at the camp, then lounge around. 1500 Cessna flight back to Nairobi,. Off to airport, check into a lounge and then an overnight flight back to London. I’ve had dinner in the lounge so pass on BA’s dinner and let a sleeping tablet kick in. Wake for a very mediocre breakfast burrito. p>
Friday 11/9/26
Heathrow express then to Euston and train to Preston where Wendy picks me up. What an awesome bucket list trip. It was truly amazing and the pictures tell it all, but I reckon 50 years from now it’ll all have been spoilt by us bloody tourists. I really enjoyed it, and 3 days safari was just enough, a full week would be too much. And as much as I enjoyed it I would not do it again but would recommend it to everyone. Again photos and videos really tell the story.
Up at the crack of Sparrows fart to fly to Copenhagen.
Usual Easy Jet flight. Only under seat luggage so we go straight through to security. Wow, one less queue.
Booked into lounge, but as usual with everything Dragon Pass there’s a screw up – long queue to check in.
Not a bad flight as usual. Check into the Crown Plaza, one of my favourites – Ross always chooses good hotels. Really modern hotel with fabulous ground floor forest and not to far from the metro.
Have a stroll down to the World famous harbour with colourful house. It’s a tourist magnet, but you have it to do. Restaurants galore, all selling the same Danish dishes. Settle for a Lobster soup and a fish Smorgesboard, with a few Carlsbergs, of course.
Back at the hotel we stop by in the rain forest for a night cap. Tuborg, not seen that in a long while.
As I’ve never been to a cricket match yet go to Baseball in Salt Lake I feel pretty guilty about my disdain for our national sport so I suggested to my kids why not go to one. Both of them came back with the restort that it’s boring and I’d rather stare at the Sun. Kurt said why not go to Oktoberfest instead – can’t quite see the link.
Anyway, here we are, Ross, Kurt and I on another easyjet flight to Munich.
Arrived at our Holiday Inn rather late so we talk a walk to local traditional German restaurant for a late dinner and some beer.
Bus tour? Fine. Red and green routes give a decent overview. Until the bus breaks down smack in the middle of a traffic light junction. Not on the brochure, but very on-brand for public transport.
Few beers scattered through the day (civilised hydration), then a final pint at a local spot before dinner. Hotel-recommended restaurant, naturally Paella.
Back to hotel bar. Plan: stay up for FCB match at 2100. Reality: I bail immediately. Kurt valiantly nurses another beer but taps out 20 minutes in. Youth these days—no stamina.
Glorious sleep. All that beer acted like a knockout drug. Who needs melatonin when you’ve got San Miguel?
GPS self-guided “Sim City” walking tour of highlights. Translation: 5 miles of wandering punctuated by strategic beer stops. Essential sightseeing.
Post-protest, we’ve another 2 miles uphill to the Cathedral. First glimpse? Properly jaw-dropping.
I think I must be pregnant as I’ve this yearning for a Bounty. Can you believe the shop where we meet our tour guide sells Bounty – a glimpse of civilisation. Being the EU no doubt the wrapper will be welded to the Bounty.
Evening: booked “highbrow” Flamenco extravaganza. Professional, highly rated by Trip Advisor, can you believe top 10% Worldwide … and about as Kurt-friendly as interpretive dance. Should’ve gone full tourist-trap version with sequins and dramatic hair flips.
Uber home, collapse into bed. Absolutely cream crackered.
Few beers around Columbus’s statue to numb the pain, then Uber to airport. Lounge? Excellent—proper food, proper drinks. Civilisation at last.
Barcelona: beautiful when it’s not actively trying to sabotage you. 7/10. Enjoyed it but never again.
Start the day at Mikes with peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
At last it’s snowing. Proper snow. Wendy’s at the Christian Centre. Mike and I are at a loose end so despite the winter storm we set off down to the archery range in Salt Lake. Pick up Marianne on the way. Well I’ve been bemoaning that I wanted to see some proper snow before we left. What better than driving on I80 over Parley’s Summit. Fortunately Mikes car has 4 wheel drive and snow tires. Unlike the dickheads causing chaos on I80, two wheel drives with no snow tires, spinning out everywhere. It’s like a war zone. Certainly made me appreciate the value and importance of 4 wheel drive and snow tires.
Lazy day after the trauma of I80. But at lease it now looks like a ski resort, even if it’s only 8″ of snow. But whites better than brown.
No pickleball because the rug rats are off school. Wendy’s at the Christian Centre.
Leave Mikes after a weeks stay and return to 163. Not too traumatic, just live out of suitcases.
Lazy morning, Wendy and I do a short walk. Then in the afternoon Mike and I do a 2 mile walk. Weather is a gorgeous blue sky spring day.
Lazy and wet morning.
Lazy morning then in the afternoon a gang of us go axe throwing.
Welcome to your first day 76 years old, as a reward for living this long let’s inflict a searing back ache on you. Isn’t old age grand, still better than the alternative, or so they say.
Quiet evening in with a very supple box of Zinfandel. Sure helped me suffer TV with a pleasant snooze. All these programs and majority are just tripe. Put you to sleep in seconds.
Lazy sort of day with a gentle stroll. 
Have a weird but pleasant meal of Shrimp and Dungeness crab in a giant plastic bag. Along with a few beers, the most expensive pint ever at $13 plus tax. Great evening.
A totally misleading and marketing driven sign in the local supermarket. Just more Bolloxs from the woke brigade:
Asylum seekers are set to be housed in brand-new council homes under a controversial Labour Government pilot scheme, sparking fears of public fury amid a crippling social housing crisis. The Home Office is pumping £100 million into the programme, allowing councils to build or refurbish properties specifically for asylum seekers, with around 900 new homes expected.
If you believe all the hype about climate change then sign up for this, who knows, it may enlighten you and change your mind:
If people come to live in Britain, they should accept they will live under English or Scottish law
If they want Sharia law there are over 60 countries which can provide it for them
Dropped Wendy off at the pantry so only an hours pickleball.
In the evening Mike takes us out to a Brazillian steak house down in Trolley Square, Salt Lake. Awesome, just what a carnivore needs.
At last it’s fly to PC day. Fortunately flight isn’t until 1330 so have a leisurely start to the day in the Escape lounge, sadly don’t manage to blag our way into Delta at Atlanta, but sat in airport is ok.
Ah, the eternal mystery of American “customer service” — or as we Brits like to call it, “customer servitude avoidance training.” One does wonder if we’ve been spoiled by centuries of expecting shopkeepers to at least pretend they want our money, or if Yanks simply view customers as mildly annoying interruptions to their paperwork. I toddle through life labouring under the delusion that I’m a customer. I know, shocking. I’ve been told it’s treatable common syndrome and I’m not dangerous — apparently there’s a 12 – step program involving mandatory indifference and a lifetime supply of “have a nice day” said through gritted teeth. After being subjected to the financial equivalent of a full cavity search by Chase and Wells Fargo—complete with more fine-print weasel words than a politician’s expense claim — I thought I’d try Zions Bank.
Another sunny but cool day.
Evening we end up at Jerri’s for a tree trimming party – not a clue what to expect. But we had a great evening good company, great food and plenty of wine. As for creating pop corn and cranberry decorations that was a first. Overall another unique American experience.
Go round to the Eccles Centre to watch Angela perform in a talent show. She was very good, sat on a stool, sang and played her guitar.
Wake to a lovely white world. We’ve had the first snow, all 3 inches of it. Can you believe that by 0900 all the roads have been plowed and all the paths, including our deck to the front door, have been cleared.
Another gorgeous day. No snow. No pickleball. Just a walk from Willow Creek up to the White Barn and back, about 3 miles.
Another bluebird day. Off for a 3 mile walk around the White barn. Awesome weather, sunny and warm enough – a great to be alive sort of day.
THE UGLY TRUTH About Pickleball’s New “Elite” Culture — And Why It’s Quietly Killing the Game
The scene from 224 driving back from Kimble Junction is amazing.
Just off on my way over to Mikes for pistol shooting and this Magnificent beast is stood outside barring the way. Walk around him and fortunately he doesn’t give a rats arse.
Why are the Worlds politicians so gullible? My rants for this months blogs are going to explore how gullible and stupid they are with respect to Islam, France, Iran, China and Hamas.
Let’s start with the Worlds politicians, especially the UK’s, in respect of Islam.
A Jolly Look at Our “Special Relationship” with France
Spend two hours booking flights. Got a good Virgin Atlantic deal on Upper Class for 110K points and $1,100 for both of us ATL to MAN.
In the afternoon we go over to Marrianes to play Canasta. Having Mike as our tutor, all the patience of a Brit in a queue when someone cuts in, is not really the smartest way to learn games that has more rules than the UK tax laws. But thanks to both of them for putting up with us. Whatever you do don’t waste a wild card on a two card meld.
Another day when Wendy has to take it easy so I have a morning bike ride. It’s so windy it’s blowing the stripes of the American flag.
Meanwhile, in unrelated news, the NHS has decided to save a few quid by making patients wait even longer. Because nothing says “healthcare” like a good old-fashioned queue, right?
Another cold but sunny day. Decide to try a Newcomers hike.
Start the day with one of Bub’s hikes around Round Valley.
It seems that Starmers latest stupidity is to try and introduce ID cards. Perhaps he thinks this diversion will save his bacon.
Meanwhile Mike puts up his all important Halloween decorations and has a ton of sweets ready for the kids on Halloween night.
Why We Absolutely, Definitely, Desperately Need a Definition of Islamophobia (Because Apparently Common Sense Is Now a Criminal Offence)
Because nothing says “progress” like a law that might one day “land you in jail for saying the wrong thing”.
In the afternoon have a final hike with Mike around Trailside.
Oh, the unparalleled thrill of soaring the skies with Delta, where luxury meets… utter chaos. Picture this: you’re settled in, ready to binge some in-flight entertainment, but the TV’s deader than my enthusiasm for airline food. Forty minutes into this glamorous journey, they saunter by with headphones for the screen—because who doesn’t love a little delayed gratification? 
3 Pack up your Union Flags and kiss democracy goodbye, because we’re apparently living in a police state so oppressive it makes Orwell’s “1984” look like a cozy rom-com. Our basic freedoms? Pfft, those are under daily assault, and to prove it, I’ve lovingly cataloged the carnage in relation to the US Constitutional Amendments — y’know, that dusty old Bill of Rights you pretend still matters. Let’s dive into this carnival of absurdity, shall we?