Monthly Archives: March 2014

20140325 – Wot no Tweenies; Wendy’s skiing parallel; Wendy ponders a season pass for next year!

Tuesday – blue bird day, 55F. Must be a blue bird day, Wendy’s skiing.

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Wot no Tweenies. Why is it so quiet? Why is it so tidy? Why is it 08:00 and not 06:00?

Oh that’s it Jaspers and the kids have gone home. Missing him already. And his parents too.

Lazy start to the day to allow the snow to soften up. No car, so it’s back to the bus. It really is a great service.

Get a few easy runs in and then stop for coffee at the Mid Mountain lodge. Snow is getting very slushy.

Up McKonkeys and the snow at the top is so much better. A few more runs and then we stop for lunch at the Snow Hut, my favourite watering hole. Resist the temptation to break the 2nd Commandment, so no beer.

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Then we take the long Home Run back down.

Wendy’s skiing seems to have really improved. I think she’s been having secret lessons. Parallel turns are coming together nicely. Impressed.

Home for afternoon tea and Carol picks up cot, baby gates, toys, baby seat and bedding she has kindly lent us. Really helped for baby Jasper – thanks to Hal and Carol.

Well I can understand why kids aren’t allowed smartphones in school.  Kurt and Fiona used to just sit there engrossed in their iPhone, not a peep out of them. Mind you after Tweenies playing Angry Birds must seem like the equivalent of Quantum Physics. 

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Thought for the day:

“Everybody in this country should learn to program a computer, because it teaches you how to think.”— Steve Jobs.
 
Mind you given the state of software / web sites I do wonder where common sense went!

Now here’s a thought to bear in mind, from a prominent leader of the religion of peace:

“Radical Islam is a creation of people who do not believe in Islam. We don’t have radical Islam, we don’t have moderates, we don’t have extremists. Islam is one religion following the Koran and the Sunna”.

Wednesday – grey and some snow.

We’re getting plenty of birds now on our bird feeder. Each morning we get a Northern Flicker Woodpecker. Much more stimulating than the IMG 2990Tweenies.

Wendy’s volunteering at the hospital this afternoon.

Real lazy start to the day to allow the snow to soften up and hopefully take advantage of some new snow.

It’s still a tad icy from yesterdays melting, but at least it’s snowing and as a result there’s hardly anybody skiing. Have a few runs and then a coffee to give the snow chance to come down and improve the skiing. Sadly there’s only about an inch so it’s still like a skating rink on some of the IMG 0756 runs. A couple more runs and I chicken out and call it a day. Silver Queen, normally a double blue, has the distinction of being a 40 degree gradient ice rink – what joy. Need to stop halfway down to sharpen my edges.

Software Normal All F..ked Up – SNAFU Of The Day

Starbucks – try to register my Star Rewards from packets of coffee. Doesn’t work, goes round in every decreasing circles. Why am I green card when I log in? I thought I was Gold card. In fact iPhone  app says I’m gold. Why does it have to be so complicated? Time to ring them. 

“Ah there’s a problem with logging stars on the web site”, she says. Of course “they’re working IMG 2991 n it!” She logs them for me. It appears that I’m a green card in the UK but Gold in the US. Something about needing a US address. Despite the fact that my app is in $. So much for being a Worldwide Company. She says “yes it’s confusing isn’t it”. It seems to me you need to have an advance degree in stupidity to comprehend it all. Ask her if Starbucks values and goals are “We have always believed Starbucks can – and should — have a positive impact on the communities we serve. One person, one cup and one neighborhood at a time.”, perhaps they could start paying some tax in the UK. It’s lost on her.

Thursday – snowy and cold day.

Ski in the morning. It’s snowing thank Chione, after yesterday we really need it.

By lunch time I’m cream crackered but am volunteering at the NAC. With a 10 year old in a mono-ski. It’s just pouring down with snow but this youngster just keeps going for it down First Time. We have to chase after him. He has amazing balance and can ski down on his mono-ski in a bucket seat with no poles. Now wonder they call this the National ABILITY Centre. We get 9” of much needed snow. 

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SNAFU of the Day

Tried to get an online pension estimate. Yes, I know it’s hard to believe that I get my state pension next year! The government site supposedly has one User ID and Password for ALL their services. Tried my Tax Id and Password. Not recognised. Tried my County Court access. Failed. Am I surprised. Try to set up a new one. Wants my National Insurance Number, Post code and Telephone to allocate me a Government site User ID. Doesn’t work. Told to contact the Help desk- now theirs an oxymoron if ever there was one. Speak to the usual un-empowered, jobs worth. Give them same info. They can’t answer why others don’t work but say they’ll clear my access so that I can try again. Still doesn’t work.

Ask the obvious question “Why do I need another unique ID when I already have one? It’sIMG 3002 called a National Insurance number”. If I want to complain I’ll have to write in. A sure fired way to stop complaints. Even if you bother to complain you just know it’s a complete waste of time.

Another example of the complete lack of thought or common sense. I bet an IT guy was involved in the need for yet another number. For Chione’s sake let’s think about the poor customer who pays your wages. He’s already got enough log ons, ID and passwords to fill 10 A4 notepads. Don’t they realise I can’t even remember what I had for breakfast. Where’s the retribution against such rank stupidity?

Unbelievable. Well no, I suppose sadly it’s just typical.

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Members of Newbury’s Muslim community have been left upset and angry by West Berkshire Council’s decision to allow a new supermarket to sell alcohol next door to Newbury Mosque, Pound Street. In January, the council’s licensing sub-committee granted the new Southern Co-operative store, due to open in the summer, a licence to serve alcohol. A small petition with just 58 signatures objected to the move.

While the Bangladesh Welfare Centre had no problems with the store being built, it ludicrously claimed that the sale of alcohol next to a place of worship would increase crime, antisocial behaviour and racial hatred. Of course no evidence was submitted and it is pretty clear that supermarkets are hardly crime hotspots for antisocial behaviour and racial hatred.

If anything trying to impose islamic laws on local non islamic communities is doing more to contribute to racial hatred than anything that could result from a Coop having a drinks section.

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The council said “It was not as if it was a licence for a pub where people could sit and drink next to the mosque, that would be different.”

Why would a pub be different? This is England and not yet under the barbaric control of sharia law. If the 58 signatures don’t like it then there’s an alternative – go live in a muslim country.

Friday – blue bird day.

Powder alert. 9” fresh powder yesterday – thank you Chione. Up at the crack of sparrows for first tracks. A real treat today as I get to ski Deer Valley today. Luxury and no snow boarders. In the lift line for 8:50. By 10:15 it’s coffee time, after 9 runs and 16 miles. Meet Wendy for lunch up at Empire, by which time I’ve cracked off 16 awesome runs and 32 miles. Can’t resist a couple of runs down rather than the bus, so it’s 18 runs, 36 miles and maximum speed of 44 MPH. Awesome skiing. Living the Dream. 
 
Finally finish watching “The Newsroom” season 2. Pretty, pretty, pretty good but not as good as “The West Wing”. Really enjoyed those bits we stayed awake through. We’ve had a free trial of HBO for nearly 3 months and this is the only thing we’ve watched. Do not think I’ll be swelling Comcast’s coffers with an HBO subscription, even if it is only a few dollars – Netflix rules.
 
Some good news for freedom of information:
 
Not a good day then, it would seem, for The Times and the cause of greater openness in public affairs as it appeared to loose a case. However, the court then announced a remarkable judgment with wide ramifications. The much-vaunted Freedom of Information Act, said the court, and the European Convention, has no more power to force a public body to disclose facts that it would prefer to remain secret than does English common law. Such law, stated the court, has long held a presumption in favour of information being revealed in these circumstances rather than concealed.

The consequences of this Supreme Court ruling cannot be overstated. Never mind the strictures of Parliament or Strasbourg, the court is saying that time-honoured common law has long suggested the existence of a public right to access information about actions performed in its name. The authorities may seek to limit our knowledge of what they do and why they do it — but in doing so they emphatically do not have the law on their side. Thus what appeared to be a triumph for the forces of opacity turned out actually to be a victory for transparency.
 
Saturday – a blue bird day. 2” fresh snow.
 

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Diet going extremely well, with the assistance of red wine, now down to 13 Stone 4lb. Just 4 lb’s to go.
 
We ski with Hal and Angela. Hal has a free buddy pass for Wendy.
 
Angelas a little downhill racer these days. No fear. Wendy struggles to keep up with her. Give Angela another couple of years at this rate and even Hal and Carol will be struggling to keep up. Have a great morning skiing with a stop for coffee and cake for Angela.
 
Hal tries to tempt me to join him down Blue Slip (Black Diamond in the middle of Blue Slip bowl). It’ll have to be groomed better than that and I’ll probably need a few brandies.
 
Wendy’s tired out by the time we get down to the bottom. Not surprised given the number of turns she does. It really is so much more restful to go straight down!
 
Home for lunch. Then a walk down to the supermarket and liquor store – Wendy’s out of brandy again!
 
Angela comes round. I think it’s mainly the iPad she wants to see, not us. She wears the iPad games out and then resorts to Disney movies, courtesy of Netflix. Tweenies is much to babyish for her she says.
 
Wendy ponders whether a season pass might be good for next year. As an OAP it’s only $500. At window prices she only has to ski 5 days and it’s cheaper. At discount prices she needs to ski 8 days and its cheaper. So far she’s managed 5 days this year. However if you have a season pass then you don’t mind going up for a couple of runs, whereas $71 for a couple of runs can be off putting. Seems like a good idea, but hopefully she’ll get a free one if we get on the winter mountain host programme as promised.
 
On Wednesday, four snowboarder called Wasatch Equality dropped a federal lawsuit on the Little Cottonwood Canyon resort, challenging its longstanding skiers-only policy.
 
A lawyer for the snowboarders said that because of Alta Ski Area’s arrangement with the U.S. Forest Service, it must comply with the equal protection clause in the 14th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. 

Alta is one of only three, very sensible, ski resorts in the United States that does not allow snowboarding, and Alta is the only one of these resorts that is operated on public land controlled by the Forest Service.
 
The ban excludes a “particular class of individuals from use and enjoyment of public land based on irrational discrimination against snowboarders,”.
 
It pits those who stand sideways on a single “snowboard” against those who stand forward on “skis,” creating hostility and divisiveness, according to the lawsuit filed in U.S. District Court.
 
Plaintiff Drew Hicken said there is no reason skiing and snowboarding can’t coexist. This guys probably never skied with snow boarders
 
“We feel that it is time for Alta to let go of outdated prejudices that perpetuate a skier versus snowboarder mentality and allow everyone, regardless of whether they are skiers or snowboarders, to share the mountain together,” he said.
 
An Alta spokeswoman said the resort wants to gather more information before commenting on the lawsuit.
 
One out-of-state skier coming off the mountain Wednesday said Alta is for skiers.
 
“It’s the only place left. Give it to ’em. Snowboarders go anywhere else you want to go, but leave Alta for the skiers,” Kevin Hurley said. “Where we live, we gotta deal with snowboarders, and we’d rather deal with skiers.”
 
Snowboarders have a reputation, deserved or not, for riding reckless and without regard for others on the mountain. Believe me it’s a deserved reputation.
 
Now a few tips for the judge when reviewing this case. See the 7 point code below and the reasons why snow boarders are incapable of complying with the various points.
 
Seven Points to Your Responsibility Code:
 
Always stay in control, and be able to stop or avoid other people or objects. See 1, 2, 6 and 8.

People ahead of you have the right of way. It is your responsibility to avoid them. See 1, 2, 6 and 8.

You must not stop where you obstruct a trail, or are not visible from above. See 3.

Whenever starting downhill or merging into a trail, look uphill and yield to others. See 4.

Always use devices to help prevent runaway equipment.

Observe all posted signs and warnings. Keep off closed trails and out of closed areas. See 6.

Prior to using any lift, you must have the knowledge and ability to load, ride and unload safely.
 
1 Snow boarders have as much idea of personnel space as the Japanese in rush hour boarding their metro. There can be a whole empty ski run and they’re attracted to skiers like moths to a light.
2 Snow boarder ski down sideways on and are therefore blind sided for 180 degrees to their left or right and hence can’t see people on their blind side.
3 Snow boarders suffer from regular bouts of sleeping sickness and take group siestas across the middle of the slopes, usually at the narrowest possible point or over a brow of a hill so that they can’t be seen. 
4 Snow boarders can’t follow simple instructions, such as look behind you before setting off. Even instructors can be seen teaching this by example.
5 Snow boarders are ignorant knuckle draggers. Even if they run into you they just can’t be bothered to stop and apologise. Their feet are automatically attracted to seats on public transport.
6 Snow boarders can’t read. Even simple words like SLOW baffle them. Evidenced by their break skiers neck speed in slow zones, where signs are posted.
7 Snow boarders move too much snow down the mountain.
8 Snow boarders are reckless.

20140320 – Skiing with the kids; my star pupil; The Tweenies turn our brains to Jello

Thursday – blue bird day. Warm and sunny.

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Lazy start. Drop Wendy off at the hospital then I get to the slopes for 10:30.

Hello newbies boots. You’ve got some big boots to fill to compete with your predecessors.

Goodbye comfy old faithful’s. You’ve kept me safe, warm and comfortable for 20 years. You’ll be sadly missed but not forgotten.

Great days skiing. Manage to get 28 miles and 13 runs in. New boots are working a treat. They seem firm, positive and I feel confident in them. Pity I have to break my feet each morning to shoehorn into them – tighter than a bulls arse when the flies are about. However, they’ve passed the all important “lunch time test”. I keep them on, no messing with clips and buckles. You can’t see where you going in most lodges at lunch time as the steam rises from sweaty feet trying to escape the agony of their boots. Clips and buckles are played with for hours. Socks steam away as they’re hung out to dry and you have DSC03213 o be careful not to tread on bare feet. Skiers breathe an orgasmic sigh of relief as they escape the implements from the Spanish Inquisition. It’s like the aftermath of a medieval torture chamber. 

Kurt and Fiona go shopping down at the Outlets Centre.

My law of maximum perversity, often known as sod’s law:

No matter where you want tot turn there will always be a snowboarder in the way.

 

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More PC terms:

 

Senile – Bag o’ Bones, Alzheimer’s Victim

 

Serial-Killer – Person with difficult-to-meet needs.

 

Shoplifter – Cost-of-Living Adjustment Specialist 

 

Short – vertically challenged

 

Sighted Person – temporarily visually abled

More religious intolerance:

The BBC asked pop star Eliza Doolittle to drop a reference to Jesus when 2014 03 19 erforming a song on the radio. Doolittle was asked to re-word her love song Walking On Water for an appearance on the Radio 2 breakfast show, hosted by Chris Evans, because she refers to Jesus walking on water, according to the Mail on Sunday.

Her lyric refers to putting on a pair of trainers to run across the water to a yearned-for love. She told the Mail on Sunday that she had to change the lyrics from:
Sometimes I wish I was Jesus, I’d get my Air Max on and run across the sea for you.
to
Sometimes I wish it was easy to get my Air Max on and run across the sea for you.

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BBC bosses are facing justified accusations they were oversensitive over Doolittle’s religious reference.

Now the BBC claimed there had been a misunderstanding , and that the corporation would not request a singer alters their lyrics.

Friday – Another blue bird day.

Wendy and I are up at 06:30 minding and feeding Jasper, because his poor wee parents need a lie in. No stamina these modern parents. So it’s Tweenies at dawn. My brains going to jello. Jaspers so excited, he’s eating his hairbrush. He’s entranced by it, doesn’t seem to matter that he’s seen it 44.5 times before.

We’re off skiing. Need to get in the car park by 10’ish or else it’s likely to be full. IMG 2933We finally manage to get Kurt and Fiona dressed and ready for skiing. Worse than getting kids up and ready. 

Spend the morning on First Time. Meet Hal, Carol and Angela, and of course Wendy with chariot and Jasper, for lunch at the Corner Cafe.

Carol and Angela take Fiona up Crescent and start the descent of Home Run. Fiona makes it all the way down Home Run. A great achievement after only 3 days skiing.

 

More PC terms:

 

Computer

Slum – Economic Oppression Zone

 

Slut – suffering from a sex addiction (female)

 

Someone who has no other reason to park in a handicapped zone – morally handicapped 

 

Spendthrift – negative saver.

 

Stained – creatively re-dyed

If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. Weinberg’s Second Law.

Given the crap served up these days by so called programmers, sadly, I’m DSC03230 shamed to admit, in pleasant society, that I was a systems designer / programmer.

More stupidity and dhimmitude from the UK:

David Cameron criticised the Islamic Shakhsiyah Foundation during Prime Minister’s Questions in 2009 as a ‘front organisation’ for a radical Islamist group Hizb ut-Tahrir.” Hizb ut-Tahrir is an international Muslim organization that is banned in many countries and openly works for the imposition of Sharia. Yet “the Islamic Shakhsiyah Foundation is being awarded grants worth more than £70,000 a year.

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Pots for rags. What chuckleheads wasted our money on this? Heads should role for sheer stupidity. Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster that I’m not home most of the year.

Saturday – another blue bird day.

Wot no skiing for me.

Wendy and I take Jasper down to Monkey Mountain play centre, while the parentals lazed around. He has a grand old time, even though he was bait young. Wendy enjoyed the slide.

Then in the afternoon the kids went a bike ride while we entertained Jasper some more. All took a drive up to the Canyons for the concert and Smores, sadly no smores, but there was a magician. Bit of a disappointment really, very crowded.

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Mexican takeaway for dinner – my favourite. But remind me not to bother with stodgy Tamales again.

Scotland wants independence. It’s just madness and will result in more bureaucracy and more self serving, power hungry politicians with their noses in as many troughs as possible – something we all need like a virulent dose of the pox. If they get it then we, England, should make sure we withdraw all assistance, currency etc. Next it’ll be Wales, then Cornwall and finally Rutland (has anyone heard of it).

 

More PC terms:

 

Stoned – Chemically inconvenienced.

 

Stud – suffering from a sex addiction (male)

 

Stupid – differently-brained, intellectually impaired

 

The Elderly – Senior citizens 

 

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Sunday – another, too hot, blue bird day.

We’re up at 06:00 looking after Jasper so that the parentals can have a bit of a lie in. More Tweenies turning our brains to Jello. 

I set off in the car, luxury, for an early morning ski. Manage to get 4 good runs in – a tad icy this early – before meeting Kurt and Fiona. After a quick run down First time Fiona’s chomping at the bit to get up Crescent ski lift and come down Home Run. She does great. Makes it all the way down, non stop, not a single fall and in perfect control. It all seems to have come together.

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Meet Wendy, Jasper and butties at Pay day for picnic lunch.

Get some family photos on the snow. Then Fiona’s off again up Crescent for another, even faster, run down Home Run. She’s done really well but is knackered by the end of the day. Never mind the jacuzzi and a beer / Pimms sorts all that.

Watch the last two episodes of the Following – pretty good. Can’t believe that there’s a 2nd and possibly even a 3rd season.

 

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More PC terms:

 

Thin – horizontally challenged

 

Thirsty – osmotically challenged

 

Tone Deaf – musically delayed

 

Too old/young – other aged

 

Too Tall – people of height

 

Tree-Hugger – environmental activist

 

Trees – Oxygen Exchange Units

Now here’s a surprise:

British authorities enforcing political correctness have allowed Muslim paedophile DSC03267gangs to sexually abuse children with impunity for more than two decades, according to a comprehensive new study that examines the harrowing epidemic of child grooming in towns and cities across Britain.

“[T]he agencies responsible for child-protection have almost entirely failed in their job to protect vulnerable children. From a fear of being called ‘racist,’ police forces across the country have buried the evidence…. Political correctness would be used to make sure that people did not speak about this phenomenon.” — from Easy Meat: Multiculturalism, Islam and Child Sex Slavery

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“[A] 2010 document by the Rotherham Safeguarding Children Board stated that, ‘great care will be taken in drafting…this report to ensure that its findings embrace Rotherham’s qualities of diversity. It is imperative that discussions of a wider cultural phenomenon are avoided.'” — from Easy Meat: Multiculturalism, Islam and Child Sex Slavery

When will we have the gonads to speak out without fear of being accused of racism (islam / muslims are not a race); islamaphobia (a made up word used by extremists. A phobia is an irrational fear, given islams track record on violence etc. it is perfectly rational to fear islam); or the new weapon of the extremists, multiculturalist, liberal, PC storm troopers to stifle free speech – blasphemy. 

Monday – another blue bird day.

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Look after Jasper from 06:30 again. Parentals have a lie in. This time try for a bit of intellectual stimulation with Sesame Street, but Jasper’s having none of it, he craves the Tweenies for the 46.5th time and still gets as excited. Never mind tonight we get more mind numbing as we have a weeks worth of crap enders, the adult equivalent of Tweenies, to catch up with – joy.

Morning is last minute shopping and of course Wendy’s weekly fix at the supermarket.

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Then we drop the kids off at the airport and say our goodbyes. Life will be so quiet and we’ll miss them and especially Jasper.

Drop the car off at hertz and have a pleasant walk home. The Traverse was a lovely car to drive and with 7 seats was just big enough. Now it’s back to walking and the bus. Much more healthy.

More evidence of the barbarism of that so called religion:

A new report on human rights in Afghanistan released by the U.S. State Department reveals that girls as young as six can be “married” away or betrothed and are the victims of frequent sexual abuse from older men, sometimes within their own families.

Although the Taliban have a reputation for religious conservatism, that IMG 1038 onservatism does nothing to protect women and girls from the sexual depredations of men. Women and girls are commonly victimized and those that speak out are likely to be blamed themselves, regardless of age differences.

The report reveals that girls as young as six can be “married” away or betrothed and are the victims of frequent sexual abuse from older men, sometimes within their own families….Afghan law requires that girls be 16 before they can marry and boys 18. Such laws are rarely respected and about 60 percent of all girls are forced to marry before 16.

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In 2013, incidents of rape also increased in Afghanistan. Most of the victims were children.

The Taliban argue that restricting child marriages is “un-Islamic.” In their culture, it is perfectly acceptable to marry children or to promise them in marriage. Traditionally a girl may be betrothed, but the marriages are supposed to be delayed until puberty. However, this is not always respected. Also, early onset of puberty can occur in some girls, sometimes as young as eight.

Wake up and smell the coffee, my real fear is that as we are a democracy, not DSC03238something that islam respects, this could become the norm in the UK (or whats left of it) within the next 25 years, if we don’t stop the spread of this pernicious, so called religion. I really don’t want my Grandkids having to grow up wearing a Burka or a beard. I used to work with so called “moderate muslims”, they were lovely moral people in every respect. But it’s no use relying upon these so called “moderate muslims”, they are cowed by the extremists and would fear the bearded ones in the mosque and being accused of apostasy.

20140315 – Kurt, Fiona and Jasper; Requiem for rear entry

Saturday – sunny but cold.

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Kurt, Fiona and Jaspers first day, so they have a lazy day. Supermarkets, walk and Outlet Centre. Jaspers in his Chariot. Great pushchair, Wendy will be able to go jogging with Jasper in it.

Picked up a great windproof jacket from Columbia Outlet, only £60.

Sunday – blue bird day.

Take Fiona on the magic carpet for her first day’s skiing. She’s only had a 1 hour taster lesson at Chill Factor, so can’t believe how good she is. Snow plough turns and stops are no problem to her. She’s even linking the turns and traversing no problem. Has good ski control and soon gets bored with the nursery slope.

Meet Wendy and Jasper for lunch on the deck.

My 20 year old rear entry boots are really on their last legs. Nothing’s built to last these DSC03106days. Back is coming loose, strap has come off and interior’s starting to decay.

Call in a few ski shops and try some new ski boots. Every one laughs at my rear entry boots.

End up liking some Technica’s but as the fitter says they’ll be a lot tighter, firmer and more difficult to get into but will improve my skiing – sales talk? Have identified my preferred boots so wait until Tuesday nights block buster sale at Cole Sports.

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Jacuzzi in the evening, along with well deserved beer.

Monday – cloudy, very windy and snow. End up getting 7’’.

Fiona’s done that well that Kurt and I take her up to the top of the mountain, 9,250 feet. She’s technically ready for this and can manage good turns and most importantly stop. Came down Home run and then Claim Jumper.  Fiona “papped herself” with the wind and slope. Then to add insult to injury a skier skied into her. Had a drink in Snow Hut and then Silver Load to the top again. Wind and snow was worse by now. Skied and walked down to Town Lift in the hope that Fiona could download to PC and I could then pick her up in the car. By now the wind was that bad that Town Lift and Crescent lift were closed. Fiona was exhausted. I flagged down a ski patroller on a snow mobile and they shipped Fiona down on the back of the snow mobile. 

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A bit of a disastrous day for Fiona, 30 mph wind, snow and being skied into really didn’t help. She’s lost confidence. Sad really because she’s got the ability. Her turns and technique are more than adequate to cope. But it’s all about confidence.

Meet Wendy again for lunch at Payday.

Kurt and Fiona have an afternoon nap so that they’re ready for a trip down Main Street for a meal and some booze. We look after Jasper.

Tuesday – cold, sun and cloud.

Chione

Merciful thanks to Chione (a tasty nymph and goddess of snow) for the 7″ of powder. Orgasmic. All gratefully received. And a special thanks to Jasper, shouting for his Dada, Dada, for waking us up at 06:00 so that I’m ready for the onslaught. 

Kurt and I get up on the slopes for 8:45 to get a couple of hours skiing in. Two hours, 10 runs, 25 miles and maximum speed of 39 mph. A great mornings skiing. Amazing we manage to get in as much skiing as most tourist manage in a full day.

The it’s back home, change, some lunch and off to Hogle zoo for Jasper. It’s a neat little zoo. Just big enough for a youngster.

There’s want. There’s need. Then there’s reckless endangerment via merchandising with “is there something we can buy?”. 

Then it’s back home and I nip down to Cole Sport to join a queue for the opening of the IMG 2712 ole Sport blockbuster sale. Yes, I actually joined a queue for 20 minutes to buy me new Technica ski boots. $700 boots for $350, that’s 50%  off. Well worth the trouble. Takes me 10 minutes to buy the boots I tried on the other day. Organised. That’s how to do it.

It’s good by comfy, old faithful, rear entry (nothing obscene about them) ski boots. For 20 years you’ve served me well, kept me warm, kept me safe and given me months of very comfortable skiing. Let’s hope the new technical marvels are as good.

Hal, Carol and of course Angela come round for dinner. They get to meet Jasper who gets on well with Angela. Have a good dinner and of course some wine.

Wednesday – blue bird day but quite cold that fortunately keeps the snow feeling good.

 

IMG 2773An early morning, 06:00, just wouldn’t be the same without the Tweenies. I can feel my brain turning to jelly by 08:00. Then of course there’s Thomas The Tank, so much more intellectual.

Fiona’s got over her fear and is ready for some more skiing. Off up to PCMR we all go and Fiona spends an hour on the magic carpet while I go off to break in my new boots, on Jonesys of course. They’re certainly more difficult to get on, tight, firm and less flex than my old slippers. 

After an hour Fiona’s ready for the green run First Time and seems to have overcome her fear. She’s doing some great skiing and amazing turns – she is a natural, despite her doubts.

Just look at this picture of a snow board instructor showing 5 year olds how to choose the best place for a siesta on the mountain. “Always choose the narrowest and most inconvenient place and spread yourselves out”. Then we wonder why they grow up with no consideration for others and the skiers code.

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Meet Wendy and Jasper for lunch. Then after lunch Fiona does some more runs down First Time and Turtle. I nip up and do a run down Payday. By the time I meet up with Kurt and Fiona again she’s getting pretty tired and legs aching so it’s time for home. She’s doing really well and is technically really ready for Home Run and the top of the mountain.

Jacuzzi time complete with a beer.

EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN!

OPEN TO MEN ONLY – ALL ARE WELCOME 

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Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE 

HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS – Step by step guide with slide presentation
TOILET ROLLS- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS? – Roundtable discussion 
DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR – Practising with hamper (Pictures and graphics)
DISHES & SILVERWARE; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES? – Debate among a panel of experts.
REMOTE CONTROL – Losing the remote control – Help line and support groups
LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS – Starting with looking in the right place Instead of turning the house upside down while screaming – Open forum 

DAY TWO 

EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN? – Group IMG 2757discussion and role play
HEALTH WATCH; BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH – PowerPoint presentation 
REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST – Real life testimonial from the one man who did
IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS? – Driving simulation 
LIVING WITH ADULTS; BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR WIFE – Online class and role playing

IMG 2769HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION – Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU’RE GOING TO BE LATE – Bring your calendar or PDA to class
GETTING OVER IT; LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME – Individual counsellors available

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20140312 – More Blue Bird days; It ain’t half hot; The kids arrive

Wednesday – cold blue bird day. 2” new snow over night. 

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Awesome mornings skiing with Carol. Snow was great. Even managed to sneak in and survive Silver King, along with a couple of other blacks and the double blue from hell – Sunrise. I think the speedometer on this app needs a little calibration.

Wendy spends the morning preparing the place for Kurt, Fiona and Jasper. What’s to prepare? Then in the afternoon she goes out with Carol and Angela. Shopping I think.

This guy just says it like it is. About time we had more of his rants http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Z38qqSZZEc.

You can see and enjoy all his rants on YouTube.

Thursday – another blue bird day but no sign of Wendy. She’s volunteering at the hospital.

Another totally bodacious day. Snows great despite the heat wave. After yesterday’s tour de force with Carol todays theme is control. Lots of short turns to keep that speed down.

But will it last?

Tears as my old faithful, slipper comfort, 20 year old, rear entry ski boots are starting to IMG 0889drop to pieces. Nothing’s built to last these days. It’s either a new pair or some araldite.

Why do all the shops laugh at these antiques when I go in?

Sadly new pairs aren’t anywhere near as comfy.

Is this the sort of free speech and censorship we’ll have to tolerate when we become a muslim / sharia state:

The BBC has controversially dropped a debate on homosexuality from a live panel discussion show because of objections from Birmingham Central Mosque in which the programme was being filmed.

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As first reported by Breitbart London, the BBC Three live debate and discussion show aimed at young people, Free Speech, had intended to ask the question, When will it be accepted to be Muslim and gay? However the show’s host Rick Edwards, announced that the debate would not take place as planned. He told the audience:

We were going to debate that question today, but after speaking to the Mosque, they have expressed deep concerns with having that discussion here.

After agreeing to allow a programme called Free Speech to be filmed at the Mosque, it is absurd and counterproductive to then censor the topic being discussed.

It is unfortunate that the BBC allowed itself to be censored on this occasion by reactionary imams.

Am I surprised!

Friday – another blue bird day. Too warm.

Out for a serious days skiing before the kids arrive. End up stuck at the bottom of Silver Load. Lifts broke. 

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Still it could be worse, I’m by the log fire in the Snowhut, with fresh coffee, plus plenty of beer and good food if needed.

Pick up SUV from Hertz. What a palaver. They have a Nissan xterra crap mobile for me. Spend 5 minutes looking for the wing mirror adjustments, then Miss Hertz spends 5 minutes searching. Brand new 2014 vehicle and they’re manual wing mirrors. Will I have to advance and retard the spark? Where’s the little man with the red flag? Unbelievable.

Insist upon my free Presidents circle upgrade and then spend an hour loosing the will to live while they get their act together. They’ve had 3 weeks to get me a car. I really am starting to loose faith with them, every time just lately there’s a cock up. Madder than a baptist in a brothel.

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Pick up kurt, Fiona and Jasper at Salt Lake airport. They’re totally powfagged after 2 flights with a 10 month old fidget arse. But at least they’re here now. Wendy’s dead excited.

Muhammad’s Deadly Teachings about Personal Hygiene

Muhammad’s followers often went to him for advice on various topics. His advice, however, wasn’t always sound. According to Muhammad, it’s perfectly safe to use water that has human waste or dead animals floating in it. Muhammad promoted dunking flies in one’s food, in order to get the cure for the diseases that flies carry. Needless to say, these teachings are quite dangerous.

So if his word is so sacred why aren’t all muslims following his advice? Seems a little selective, picking and choosing what they like. Now there’s a surprise.

20140308 – Skiing in a Zimmer Frame. Is my skiing really that bad?

Saturday – too hot and very sunny. Melting the precious snow.

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Lazy day off skiing today. Wendy and I have volunteered with the NAC to help set up for the NAC’s Red, White and Snow gala dinner up at the Montage Hotel at Deer Valley. Spend the morning helping out; setting trees up; tables and chairs; hoisting trees up onto the balcony while Wendy helps layout the items for the auction. Dinner costs $4,000 for a table of 10, so do the maths. Then there’s the charity auction as well. Of course the Montage is a really plush hotel, cheapest room for a night is $1,150 plus taxes no doubt and tips of course. Costs more than we pay for 2 weeks in our superb home from home. It’s not called Deer Valley for nothing.

In the afternoon we have a bike ride to the supermarket – oh the excitement, oh how we live.

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Then we get to have afternoon tea – one has to have standards – sat on our deck in the brilliant sunshine. It was warmer out than in. I can see in summer we’re going to really enjoy this deck.

Of course no American home would be complete without a barbecue, and yes we have one. It’s a sizeable gas one, so we checked it out. It works! Just needs a good clean as it looks like the previous people must have barbed every day for a year and never bothered clearing away any of the debris. Nice job for Wendy.

Why is it that when I want to renew my tax disc I  have to provide either the 16 digit reference number shown on your renewal 
2014 RWS Logo FINAL reminder, or the 11 digit reference number from your Registration Certificate (also known as the Logbook) and your vehicle registration mark (number plate)?

Isn’t the reg no unique enough for you?
Why when I want to make an vehicle online enquiry you need the make as well as the Reg No?
Isn’t the reg no unique enough for you?

Are they frightened someone will pay my tax disc for me?

Sunday – a sunny blue bird day.

Meet Randy at 09:00 and have a great mornings skiing.

Hal was going to join us but it looks like he forgot that the clocks went forward so he didn’t make it.

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Wendy, Carol and Angela all go down to Salt Lake to see Disney on Ice. Wendy really enjoyed it. I passed as did Hal, apparently he fell asleep through it last year, and as I fell asleep through Toy Story 3 I thought I’d better pass.

Of course no afternoon out would be complete without a merchandising opportunity with a trip to Costco.

Spent the afternoon researching HTML5 and CSS3. Learning these two and then creating some web pages in them is my next project. I’ve decided to put my Physics on a back burner and try and keep my IT skills up to date for now. Who knows perhaps I could go and help out at the BBC iPlayer department. Certainly even an illiterate 5 year old could do better than that bunch of apologists for IT professionals. 

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Bought an Ultra Tough Ultrasteel Adjustable from Walmart, all for less than $2. Comes complete with a warning that “This Wrench contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm”. Fortunately this would appear not to be a problem in the other 49 states, as it miraculously must change it’s molecular structure to be less harmful, or is not “known” about. Now I know that the US is the land of litigation warnings that hot coffee can burn; that you should not put your dog in a microwave oven. But come on this warning has to be as stupid as the steel is tough.

Perhaps to be on the safe side I’d better hang the wrench 50 feet away from the house and hope that it doesn’t kill the tree, which probably has a preservation order on it.

Monday – cloudy, cold and very windy. With the promise of snow later in the day – let us pray.

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Up and skiing for 09:00. Fancied a “bit of black” – am I allowed to say that – today and for the first time since we’ve been here Widow Maker, a black diamond, has been groomed. Wendy can put away the insurance policy, I survived. Very pleasant, as was Dynamite. “A black diamond a day keeps the fear at bay.” But, I still ski with more style on a blue or double blue.

Have a great morning skiing and the snows pretty good. By 10:30 I’ve filled me ski boots and had some great runs. And yes my boots are still hanging in their but need the tender loving care of some Araldite. I do so hope they’ll survive. After 20 comfy years they’ve served me well and I’m really attached to them.

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Then I’m on volunteer duty at the NAC. Looks like my skiing’s that bad they put me in a 4 Track zimmer frame – a frame that has two skis already on, you can stand up in it with your ski’s on while, like a zimmer frame, while Jim, the instructor, has you tethered and takes you down the mountain – greens only as it’s too unstable on blues or blacks. See pictures. It’s part of a sign off process for Jim. My role is to play a 64 year old who used to ski; had a medical problem 5 years ago that made my legs weak; not been able to ski since; needs a zimmer frame to walk with. Jim’s being tested by Don, the education programme manager, to see if he’s ok to be let loose on teaching with a 4 track.

Good couple of hours. Certainly different. Don’t know whether Jim passed or not.

Weight loss is going well, as is the drinking. Down to my lowest weight for at least 10 years. 13St albs, in proper units of measure. That’s 19 lbs lost since November.

Wendy’s finished yet another knitting master piece. This time it’s a bobble hat, with extra big bobble as requested, for Jasper – see picture.

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Iranian TV shows a disgusting cartoon video (just to show that I harbour no bias a copy can be seen here) of Jews being gassed in the Holocost and even taking an inhaler of ZycloneB, the gas used in the gas chambers.Well it seems that the religion of peace doesn’t mind cartoons of Jews:

Yet, even a simple cartoon of Mo causes riots, burning, fatwas and killing in the name of that pernicious religion.

And to top it all, the islamic World ( yes I won’t even grace the word islam or muslim with a capital letter) now is banning the new film Noah. It seems that the film had been banned for reasons of religious intolerance. The film conflicts with all religions. Out of respect for these religious sentiments, we are banning the film.

The sunni muslim institute Al-Azhar issued a statement condemning the movie, saying it should be banned. It rejects the screening of any production that characterises allah’s prophets and messengers and the companions of the Mo [the religious character Muhammad].

Well that’s good enough recommendation for me. I’ll be sure not to miss the Noah film.

Tuesday – Sunny and cold with 6” powder snow overnight. As it should be.

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Volunteer for the NAC at Deer Valley. Why is it when I volunteer it’s a powder alert day?

Talk about a complete body workout. It’s a really tough session as  the young girl we’re supporting has very little use in her legs and we have to help her to walk and manoeuvre her on skis. Lots of snow ploughing and pulling her along on skis. At one stage she get’s that tired that we have to call the ski patrol to sledge her down to the bottom of the mountain. By 12:00 I’m knackered too. However manage a great afternoons skiing at Deer Valley.

Hal, Carol and Angela come round and we set up baby gates and cots ready for Jaspers arrival.

Here he goes again:

THE hate preacher Anjem Choudary and his followers could face prosecution under anti-IMG 0913terrorism laws after appearing to promote al-Qaeda-linked groups on a busy London high street while demanding the creation of an Islamic state.

Extremists drove up and down the road in a white van emblazoned with a logo synonymous with jihadists in Syria. They also handed out badges featuring the symbol to children.

Haven’t we had enough of this joker who has 4 children, sponges off the state he despises and wants to see overthrown. When will someone grow some gonads and chuck him out the country to somewhere that has the Sharia law he so pines for. I’m all for human rights etc but this scrot is just trying to chop off the right hand and left foot of the all the infidels that feed him. France have had the guts to ban him. Lets use the democracy that he so despises and pass a “common sense” law, kicking him out.

20140302 – Shoot out at Park City; Mountain bikes; Angelas birthday;

Sunday – mixture of sun and cloud.

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A well deserved day off. Lazy morning of coffee, newspapers and internet.

After lunch we’re off to Walmart to buy our bikes. Wendy gets a new toy, a purple comfy bike, cross between a mountain bike and a street bike with a comfy seat, of course. Note the colour, most important. Order it over the internet for in store pick up – saves $10.

I get a mountain bike. Colour doesn’t matter, it’s on offer and saves $100. 

We’re all set for summer now.

Just what we need:

Falling asleep to a movie on Netflix is a wonderful feeling, but one that can turn to frustration IMG 2597 he next day as you try to figure out where you left off.

It’s one problem that Netflix engineers tried to solve during an internal company Hack Day last week, according to TechCrunch. The hack involves using a Fitbit wristband to detect when the user has fallen asleep. When snoozing commences, Netflix slowly fades the audio and puts the movie on pause. It also creates a bookmark at the point when sleep began so snoozing users can easily return to that point later.

Wendy refuses to ride all the way home, it’s up hill, so we have to catch the bus. You can even take bikes on the bus, mind you when it’s full of skiers it’s a squeeze, like Talibans at a riot.

Hala meat yet again:

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Parents fury as pork sausages are banned from the school menu and replaced with halal meat.

Sausages, ham and other pork products have been banned at Brinsworth Manor Infant and Junior Schools in Rotherham. Just 20 per cent of the 600 pupils at the two schools are Muslim. Governors agreed to the change to make the school more inclusive. Rotherham Council said only serving halal meat was a ‘minor adjustment’. The move comes as Britain’s vets call for Muslims and Jews to use more ‘acceptable’ methods of killing.

Just the sort of dhimi multicultural attitude that is selling this country into sharia slavery and the sort of madness that made me give up as chair of governors at a primary school that was predominantly muslim. Goldfish for jam jars.

Monday – sun and cloud I think.

By way of a change I skied in the morning but it was a somewhat tardy start to the day. Wendy IMG 2600worked.

Another awesome day. Just 2″ on top of corduroy. Easy skiing with pretty patterns. Tycoon and Keystone are superb.

In the evening Hal and Carol pick us up and we go up to the Farm restaurant, at the Canyons, to celebrate Angela’s 5th birthday. Meet Randy up there.

Angela’s quote was, “I am 5 today, before I was 4”. 5 years old going on 45.

Good food, good company, a great evening.

Tuesday – snow all 5” of it.

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Fluffy thick buttermilk pancakes with lashings of maple syrup and blue berries for breakfast. Go ski on that. Trees under threat today as they’re bombarded with Mardi Gras beads, knickers and bras thrown off the lifts onto the trees – cruelty to trees. They’re beautiful enough and need no adornments.

Out at the crack of sparrows. A great morning. A real white out but and snow teaming down.

Lovely fresh powder to turn the legs to jelly. Runs are quiet as people take shelter from the snow or go home. Well worth the effort. My black diamond for the day is dynamite. Get to the top of it and it’s a real whiteout – see picture. Go or walk up and out of it. Being lazy I go for it. Just survived it, but where did those steel reinforced moguls come from? So where’s IMG 2608up or down? Where am I?

In the afternoon we attend a timeshare promotion at the Canyons, Hilton. Picked up and ferried home in style. Thanks to hilton timeshare for the $225 for attending their luxurious place at the Canyons. Will buy us 3 discounted Deer Vally passes in place of the 2 promised. We’ll gladly come again, on any snowy day. And no we didn’t buy.

Can you believe this, religion still dominating even in this day and age:

Thousands of homeowners around the country have been notified by the Land Registry that they are liable to pay for repairs to their local Church of England church.

Chancel Repair Liability (CRL), dates back to the time of Henry VIII and gives some churches the right to demand financial contributions towards repairs from local property owners.

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The liability is due whether or not the landowners are Anglicans, or even Christians.

In some cases, payment could be for the full cost of repairs, sometimes running into hundreds of thousands of pounds, but normally the cost will be shared with others locally.

Wednesday – blue bird day, quite warm in the 40’s.

So this is what yesterday’s whiteout run picture looks like.

Blue bird day but not up to Wendy’s standards. 

Get the adrenalin pumping with 3 blacks (amazing isn’t it the Americans still have that word in their dictionary, unlike the loony liberal PC thought police in the UK who have raped and pillaged our language to avoid mythical offense) before coffee. Silver skis is pretty daunting, followed by Crescent and dynamite which look almost green by comparison to Silver Skis. A great mornings skiing get my black a day in and 10 awesome runs.

After lunch we saddle up and ride down, note the direction, to Walmart to pick up some simple bike tools. Only takes 50 minutes as Wendy keeps stopping to “admire the views”! Then it’s a IMG 2623 well deserved Starbucks before catching the bus back up to the Peaks hotel. Must have done about 8 miles all told and down 300 feet. It does not bode well for summer.

Smell the coffee. That religion is intent on taking over. I really don’t want my grand kids to have to wear the burka, grow a beard or even stone me to death because of my blog:

Documents reveal that a group of fundamentalist Salafists, are being investigated by Birmingham City Council after they apparently urged a Muslim takeover of failing schools.

The Sunday Times reported that the council is deeply concerned about Operation Trojan Horse strategy documents which allegedly outline plans oust to headteachers in Muslim areas of the city, and turn the schools into faith-based academies run on Islamic principles.

The documents, leaked to the Sunday Times, call for an end to corrupting children with sex education, teaching about homosexuals, making their children say Christian prayers and mixed swimming and sports.

They say parents should:
Parachute in Muslim governors to drip-feed ideals for a Muslim school

Have an English face to campaigns to turn secular schools into faith-based academies

Wear down the resolve of a headteacher at a targeted school so they eventually give up

Thursday – warm and sunny, with a bit of snow.

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What an awesome day, 3 hours great skiing; a couple of hours volunteer skiing at the National Ability Centre with a severely disabled 7 year old on a bi-ski, instructor was brilliant with him; then Park City gun club with Randy. 

Great safety briefing and then get to fire off 2 different 45’s, have the kick of a kangaroo kick boxer; a 40 and then a .22 complete with silencer, at least if you shoot someone with this one it doesn’t damage their hearing or disturb the neighbours. Serious stuff. Shell casings flying everywhere, muzzle flashes. Makes you appreciate ear defenders, safety glasses and how ridiculous the movies are. One of the 45’s was a heavy, manly browning first produced in1911 – see picture. The 2nd was a small quite lightweight 45. Being so lightweight it gave an even bigger kick than the Browning, but an ideal gun to carry.

Great Western experience, thanks to Randy.  Something that you can’t experience in the UK with our strict gun laws.

Living the Dream.

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Don’t you just love the contradictions of that religion:

Peaceful and tolerant verses, in the quran, lie almost comma by comma with violent and intolerant ones. From, there is no coercion in religion (2:256), or the multitude that command believers to fight all non-Muslims till they either convert, or at least submit, to Islam (8:39, 9:5, 9:29).

To get out of this quandary, the commentators developed the doctrine of abrogation, which essentially maintains that verses revealed later in Muhammad’s career take precedence over earlier ones whenever there is a discrepancy.

But hang on isn’t this fairy story meant to be the word of a supreme being, a god no less! What sort of supreme being contradicts themselves. Crazier than a taliban fundamentalist wrapped in a pigskin.

Friday – cold, some snow, sun and clouds.

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3” fresh powder overnight on top of some icy runs. In the queue for Eagle Lift start. Then it’s Temptation; Shamus; King Kong; Jonesys, of course; Assesment; lazy run down Claim jumper; coffee; then a long run down to the base via Silver Queen and Hidden Treasure. Pass on my daily black, Combustion, whilst the powder was tempting the ice underneath made me chicken out.

A pretty good but lazy mornings skiing. 3” of powder is just ideal. Not to difficult but just enough to create great pretty pattern turns.

As usual by lunch time it’s skied out so well IMG 2625worth the early start.

Disaster nearly strikes when I get home and one of my 20 year old rear entry ski boots seems to have fallen apart. Thankfully it’s easily fixed with just a clip back in. My boots are so comfortable that I’ll be devastated when they finally give up keeping me attached to my skis. No one makes rear entry boots anymore and yet they’re so comfortable and easy to get into – just one buckle, not the 4 to 6 buckles of a modern boot.

After lunch take a bike ride to the liquor store for some beers. I suppose I could have managed but wanted a bit more exercise.

What is it with Utah and all these tarty, fruity beers? What perverted fruitcake dreamed up a Blackberry beer. Yet try and buy a decent German lager or pilsner and it’s as likely as finding a politician with a skerrick of common sense.

In the evening we make a start on “House of Cards”, season 2.

 

20140224 – 8″ is more than enough; France cracks down on drunken skiers; 21″ fresh powder; Blue bird day for Wendy

Monday – sun and cloud. Quite warm in the 40’s – not good.

IMG 2525This retirement malarkey is a hard life. Not for the faint hearted, requires total dedication and concerted effort.Lazy start. Stap me vitals do I have to go skiing yet again, dam me no. 

Manage a good moorings skiing and then come home to do battle with the Car insurers (thankfully “Noddies gone past Big Ears” for them so it’ll have to wait for tomorrow) and to see if I can possibly get some more contact lenses without a prescription. What is it with this namby pamby World? Why do I need a prescription less than a year old? I’m an adult and can make up my own mind on these things.

Seems like Canada is the place to order from. It’s obviously full of adults who are quite capable of re-ordering their contact lenses without the need for a piece of paper from a jobs worth in protected employment.

Here in the land of the free and the religion of the dollar there are some things that seem IMG 2531 ack handed or “quaint”. Such as ordering contact lenses; joining CostCo online; using a British credit card, especially online or at a petrol station – mainly seems to be a problem of computers (them dam things again) accepting a UK zip code; receiving post – you need a post office box or some deal with a long right armed US Postal Service geezer; no chip and pin, in fact quite often not even a signature; prices quoted without tax, so its always more than it says on the label; not to be outdone by getting Comcast Xfinity TV and Internet set up.

We’re still catching up on the Olympics with the daily 1 hour summary on BBC2 – the less said about that the better.

But has anyone noticed how most of the women in the Olympics seem to be eye candy? Perhaps athletic prowess goes with looks. 

And what’s with this two man bob sleigh event. Why don’t they just replace the second man with a sack of potatoes. Would be about as much use and have the same personality as most of them. Mind you given their role it’s no surprise there’s hardly anyone at home.

 

France has launched a crackdown on drunken skiers in the wake of spate of fatal accidents in the slopes.Inebriated skiers will face criminal prosecution in France under laws that carry a maximum penalty of a year in jail, although a fine of up to €15,000 is more likely for minor offenders. Gendarmes say that one in five ski accidents in France is due to drunkenness, whilst a quarter of skiers aged between 15 and 24 questioned in a recent Austrian study admitted to having descended a slope whilst tipsy.

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No doubt they’ll introduce a new law that requires every skier to carry two breathalyser kits. And no doubt in true French fashion they’ll ignore it and just the Brits will conform.

Tuesday – another hot blue bird day. 48F. Much too warm.

Good mornings skiing. Get my daily quota in. “A black diamond a day, keeps the fear at bay”. Skiing is all about confidence. It is soo much easier to go straight down with little turns than long sweeping turns across the slopes. Snow held up well from yesterday despite all the sun and warmth, but by lunch time it’s like an anaemic slush puppy down at the base.

Please let it snow. Please let it get cold.

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Meet Wendy for lunch at Payday. Then she heads off down to Kimble Junction to buy some buttons for the Thomas Tank jumper she’s knitted. God knows what she’ll do next. At least the knitting keeps her occupied and quiet!

For me I’m on volunteer duty all afternoon at the National Ability Centre. Todays student is just on ski’s so I get to ski with poles and there’s no lugging, lifting and picking them up off the snow. Mind you although she’s skiing very well it’s that slow that I spend the whole afternoon having to snow plough behind her to run interference and stop loonies, scum boarders of course, from running in to her. You’d be amazed at how stupid and reckless some are.

After an afternoons snow ploughing there are muscles in my foot that I never knew I had. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to ski parallel again.

Very wise saying:

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Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.

According to the experts we’re all doomed. 

Doomed to be overtaken by computers as the dominant life form on this planet within the next 15 to 25 years.
Life form? Well, almost. Computers will eventually beat us at all mental tasks.
They will chat, joke, flirt, understand us better than we understand ourselves and know the significance of every word mere humans have ever written. These machines will also build more machines, each more amazing than the last. They will reproduce, and their children will conquer the universe.We cannot uninvent computers. 
The question is, can we program them to be content with a good book and a glass of red wine? It’s surely worth a try, but it may already be too late.

Judging by the state of the current programs and web sites, especially those jerk IMG 2480 rained nerds at the BBC, there’s absolutely no chance that any robot will even be capable of crawling out of the slime of a swamp. Just think if it could be achieved we may become the pets and slaves to these superior life forms but at least we might have some access to software, written by a robot, that actually works. Who knows perhaps we’d be able to watch BBC iPlayer without the Law of Maximum Perversity kicking in and boiling my blood. Bring it on.

Now here’s a surprise.

Net immigration has risen to more than 200,000 in a significant blow to David Cameron who has pledged to reduce it below 100,000 by the next general election.

The sooner we get out from under the skirts of Merkel, that snail sucking spendthrift Hollande, along with his harem, and the EU in general the better.

Wednesday – blue bird day. Hot and very sunny.

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Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit it is yet another blue bird day. Wendy’s hit the slopes and an 09:00 start to boot. 49F, too warm.

Praying for snow, lots of it, and let’s get rid of the therms as well.

More misnomers from the World of medicine: 

Being overweight is unhealthy

The accepted wisdom is that if you have a body mass index (BMI) of between 25 and 30, then you are overweight and this will shorten your life.

People with a BMI of between 25 and 30 were actually 6 per cent less likely to die than people considered to have a healthy BMI, ie, 18.5 to 25.

Meanwhile “The Tony Ski Diet” is working a real treat. Lost 9lbs since we got here, IMG 2506 espite consuming copious amounts of beer and red wine. I really think I’m going to start a business of my diet with guaranteed weight loss – could pay for my annual ski trip. That’s a total of 18lbs lost since November and our Marco Island trip. At this rate I’ll need some string to keep me pants up. Mind you I still have a 6% advantage over scrawny geezers.


Whilst I detest the Daily Mail for it’s ability to make me madder than a puffed toad and boil of my blood. I have to say how impressed I was to learn that during WW1 the daily mail broke ranks with all the other newspapers of the day and exposed the wrong kind of shells sent to the western front. Their editorial “the tragedy of the shells”, exposed how the British government / Lord Kitchener in particular was responsible for the death of its own citizens.

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A typical mornings skiing can burn up 1,700 calories. That means I can consume 3 bottles of red wine or 12 bottles of beer a day and not gain an ounce. After 17:00 hours of course.

Seriously raised the question of whether the ruling classes had the ability to lead as generals.  

How come it’s lost it’s way so badly?

Thursday – raining in town and snow on the mountain. 

There’s stupid, there’s really stupid and then there’s brains dropped out (usually reserved for politicians), but I have to admit setting off skiing in the rain falls into the later. At least at the top it’s snowing. Arrived after 10 minutes on the lift looking like an extra for the Snowman film. Jonesys was worth it though with 3″ fresh powder. After 3 runs cocooned in gortex I call it a day. Can’t see where I’m going without wipers on me goggles. Not that It would make much difference as it’s a white out anyway. What a wimp. At least I know my gear works. My Tuesday afternoon volunteering – snow ploughed all afternoon – is still making the old abductor digit minimi ache (foot’s killing me) like IMG 2552hell.

After lunch we pop into town to Carols condo on main street to see if we’d prefer a different coffee table and rug. Then it’s up to the Java cow for a coffee and for Angela a cow biscuit.

More misnomers from the World of medicine: 

Drinking two litres of water a day will do wonders for your body and mind

This is a myth, but where did this figure of two litres come from? It probably dates back to the 1940s when researchers calculated that this was how much water someone’s body used in 24 hours. There is absolutely no evidence to back it up. The IMG 0732boring truth is: just drink when you’re thirsty and you’ll be fine.

The war in Syria began much earlier than is generally recognised. The conflict actually began in the year 632 with the death of that Mo geezer. The same is true of the violence, tension or oppression currently gripping the Muslim world from Iraq and Iran, though Egypt, Bahrain and Saudi Arabia to Yemen, Pakistan and Afghanistan.

What most of the crucibles of conflict in the Middle East have in common is that Sunni Muslims are on one side of the disagreement and Shia Muslims on the other. The rift between the two great Islamic denominations runs like a tectonic fault-line along what is known as the Shia Crescent, starting in Lebanon in the north and curving through Syria and Iraq to the Gulf and to Iran and further east.

Apparently it all stems back to the death of that Mo geezer and his lack of a male IMG 2554 rotch dropping to succeed him – he only had a daughter, like all women in that so called religion, she didn’t count then and females still count for nowt, other than sex objects, breeding machines and scullery maids.

The majority of his hangers on thought his closest fanatic buddy, Abu Bakr, should take over. They became the Sunnis. But a minority thought the Prophet’s closest relative, his son-in-law and nephew Ali, should succeed. Ultimately the Shia.

The two sides agreed on the Quran but had different views on hadith, the traditions recorded by Mo’s hangers on. 

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As the years passed the rift hardened into a schism. The seeds of civil war had been sown.

So yet again religion becomes the source of evil.

Friday – sun, cloud and some snow.

05:30 powder alert phone call, just to make sure I get up. Really must reprogram IFTHISTHENTHAT to ring me after 07:00 when a powder alert emails received. Her in doors has no appreciation of the early morning call and excitement of a powder alert.

On the lifts over here everyone chats away to you, unlike a bus journey full of black bin liners with slits in them in downtown Blackburn. Common question is have you skied in Europe? How does it compare? Answer is “I’m not going back to skiing in Europe unless poverty strikes”. It’s just so much better over here; better service; less crowded; better runs, mainly wider; friendly people; civilised lift lines instead of a rugby scrum; just so much more relaxing and enjoyable. But the one thing a lot of the European resorts, especially Austria, have is the charm of the villages. You’re woken every morning by the church bells summoning the faithful. Over here we have a similar equivalent. It’s the early morning sound of mortars clearing avalanches and summoning the faithful to fresh powder.

Mind you Park City is a great town. Lots of character; awesome free bus service; Park city dusk prospector ph veryone is so friendly; lots going on; no black bin liners and the associated problems. Won Outside Best Town Ever 2013. Quite rightly so. I’m always quite proud to say I’m living the dream here this year. If we ever win the lottery and can afford the US health service then as the Mormons say “This is the place”. And no I’m not thinking of becoming a Mormon!

Everyone here tells me the summers are even better than the winters. My retort is “How can they be? There’s no snow!”. But they insist.

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Awesome 11″ fresh snow. Transforms the tired slush to a winter wonderland. Awesome morning’s skiing with Hal and Randy. All that fresh powder. Thanks guys.

More snow on the way. Let’s be greedy and pray for another 11″ or better still 22″.

After lunch Wendy and I go for a walk (just what I need after a great mornings powder) to do some bike shopping. We want to get a mountain bike ready for the worse weather of summer, no snow that is. They reckon the summers are gorgeous here so we’ll be ready geared up. Try White Pines but not much choice yet and very, very expensive. Walmart’s more in our price bracket as we’ll be giving the bikes away, hopefully to a worthy cause, at the end of the summer. Much cheaper than hiring.

After getting nearly every bike down and test riding them around Walmart, we finally settle on a mountain bike for me and comfort / crossover for Wendy. Pick them up Sunday.

Drop our rent off at Hal’s. It’s actually quicker to get off the bus at Peaks and do the IMG 2584 0 minute walk to our place than stay on and transfer to the green bus. Really getting into this walking and Wendy’s nearly managing to keep pace with me without too much whinging.

Living the Dream.

More misnomers from the World of medicine: 

There’s no such thing as a healthy tan 

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It’s certainly true that ultraviolet light causes skin damage, skin ageing and can lead to skin cancer, but the most lethal form, melanoma, is not straightforwardly related to ultraviolet exposure. Melanoma is more common in people who work indoors than in people who work outdoors.

There is increasing evidence of a huge range of benefits to be got from regular exposure to the sun. Recent studies have shown that low levels of vitamin D are strongly associated with increased risk of heart disease, stroke, schizophrenia, multiple sclerosis, asthma and at least a dozen cancers. S unshine is not just good for your body, it’s good for your mood.

Saturday – snow, sun and cloud.

Another powder alert. 8” this time. Was going to have the day off as Saturdays are IMG 2579usually so busy, but it would be a sin to miss all that powder.

In the 08:55 queue for the start of Eagle lift. Hang on there’s no one there. Dam me no, the lifts on hold due to high winds. Just think Temptations (ski run) is up there waiting with all that powder. 

Oh well Crescent lift it is then.

8″ Virgin powder is more than enough, plus 11″ yesterday. Totally bodacious.

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It’s a war zone out there. Mortar rounds going off to clear the avalanche risk; bodies strewn everywhere; people searching for lost skis; even ski patrollers on their butts, gives me hope; chopped up moguls; even 2 foot wind drifts. Truly cream crackered, legs like a Glaswegian drunk after a Saturday night binge. A well deserved coffee by my favourite fireplace. Meanwhile, from my new tracker app, I have this American sounding wench chunnering away in my ear every 5 minutes telling me how fast and far.

At least this tracker apps better calibrated. No longer doing 106 MPH, back down to a sensible 40 MPH. I really do need to work more on these short turns down the sides of the runs and better control, rather than going off like an escaped banshee chased by a zombie Road Runner. As for deep powder / moguls / chop well that’s a dream, but it does turn your legs to jelly.

After lunch we decide on a walk / bus up to the Canyons. Just a bit more exercise.

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We’d never dream of this in Belthorn, there just isn’t the activities or incentives. But over here, even though it’s cold, it’s just great to get out and enjoy the surroundings.

Even sat waiting for the bus you can be delighted with the simple pleasures of a snow flake drifting down and landing on your eyeball.

At the Canyons sit by the fire listening to the free concert from some band that everyones just ignoring – I wonder if Queen or the Beatles had been playing they would have been ignored. At least it’s some pleasant music and a juggler. Pass on the snores. This dam 2nd commandment of retirement does get in the way over here – “thou shalt not drink before 17:00”. Lively and free afternoons entertainment.

Call in for a black box of Merlot on the way back.

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Breaking Bad in the evening. Trying desperately to keep awake. Exhausted. Then Comcast goes down. Disaster. No Netflix. No Internet.

I think tomorrow will be a day of rest, going all religious. Unless there’s a major powder alert, then who knows what may happen.

Modern day sex education consists of students donning booze glasses (distorts their vision as if drunk). They then have to grope bodies to determine sex; put a condom on a banana. Then no doubt they can choose from 4 of the ugliest girls in the class, thereby appreciating the impact of a few beers on choosing a bird for the night and learning that all important maxim of “pull early before the alcohol kicks in”. Or the wise old saying, “Go for the ugly early and you’ll never go home alone”.It also turn out that condoms are dished out freely. What is the World coming to? But sadly the essential skill of one handed grope and bra opening is not taught  – that Gove geezer needs to get his act together.

Hey, ho the religion of permanent offence are doling out free publicity again:

A petition has been started to get Katy Perry’s latest music video banned. The IMG 2587fantasy video for the song Dark Horse includes a necklace disintegrating in a flash of CGI lighting effects. Apparently the necklace has script bearing the name of the Muslim religious character, Allah. Shazad Iqbal of Bradford, England, condemned the video claiming that the image of the  disintegrating necklace is somehow blasphemous and should be banned from YouTube.

By Tuesday afternoon, the petition had been electronically signed by more than 42,000 fruitcakes, a number dwarfed by the 30 million views the video has garnered on YouTube since Feb. 20.

If anybody can see the supposed detail they’re throwing their burka’s off about, then they must have the eyes of a hawk, with the speed of a a jihadist detonation. Nobody would have noticed, but yet again they’ve managed to give it more publicity than a burka clad stripper in an Iranian mosque. So, as part of my desensitising treatment to help improve the mental health of these fundamentalist freaks here’s the video in case you missed it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KSOMA3QBU0.

Seems to me that a really good way to market any new product or service is to include some reference or image of Mo and leave it to the fundamentalist barbarians from the religion of permanent offence to help it go viral.