Tony & Wendy's Travel Blog

20140824 – Last days; Homeward bound

Posted on August 30, 2014 by admin

Sunday – warm and sunny.

First snow fall on Jupiter and it’s only August – exciting

As we’ve got a car we’re off out for the day.

Drive out over Guardsmen Pass and then down into Midway – stunning views. Down Provo canyon and turn right up the Alpine Loop road, past Sundance ski resort and around the Timpanogos. Take a slight detour down to Cascade Springs, then back onto Alpine Loop road for more stunning views and eventually get to the visitors centre at Timpanogos cave. All free as our National Park pass – America The Beautiful – covers us.

Have a shifty around the small visitors centre at the caves, lunch in the car and then a short nature trail down to a swing bridge that doesn’t swing.

Then drive to Little Cottonwood canyon. Call off at Snowbird. Honestly I had no idea there was a Oktoberfest

Timpanogos

on – see rant below. Then onto Alta but alas no where “nice” for afternoon tea / coffee, so Wendy dips out.

Drive up to Big Cottonwood canyon past Solitude – still as empty as ever – and then back over the spectacular Guardsmen pass and back home.

A 6 hour drive but some spectacular scenery and worth it.

More wisdom from George Carlin:

Crystal springs

Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and He needs money.

The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.

If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse.

Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other people’s stuff.

Has the World gone completely mad or is it just Utah.

Gentle nature walk in the Timpanogos

We call in at the Oktoberfest at Snowbird. My eyes light up and I’m orgasmic at the thought of it, already drooling like a geriatric boxer dog.

1st – we need to see ID to buy a drink. For Chiones sake whatever happened to common sense. Flattering as it may be to think that I look under 21 it’s just as crazy as believing the sun isn’t real because it got dark last night.

2nd – how can you sell Bud and other American pinkle waters at a beer festival. It’s a complete violation of any trade description laws they may have over here.

3rd – I remember I’m driving and Wendy’s not insured on this Enterprise mobile. Not too bad as they’re mainly what I’d call perverted beers rather than any proper German brews, so I’m not too devastated. Then we encounter one stall selling Hofbrau – the only decent beer in the whole place. In bottles too! Now I’m excited, nay orgasmic. A couple of them to take home will do me just fine. Oh no! Not allowed to sell bottles to take home / out, Utah laws. Have to open the bottles and drink it here. Ironic isn’t it there’s all these people drinking, and judging by the number of cars driving, yet, I’m for zero tolerance to drink driving and I can’t take even a single bottle home. Moronic when you really think about it.

Monday – warm and sunny.

Pick Hal up and head off to the Timpanogos caves.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154559029230249&set=a.10153673070225249.1073741845.621375248&type=1

Essential requirements to get a green card:

Drive a gas guzzler and never be caught walking.

Drink coke or Dr Peppers out of a 52 ounce plastic cup.

Have a giant gas barbecue. Use it every time the sun comes out and to boil the kettle on.

Be able to say that all important American phrase like “Go f..k yourselves” with gusto and meaning.

Treat Stop signs with reverence and ignore any rules of the road on roundabouts.

Join the NRA and make no jokes or derogatory remarks about them or guns or the 2nd – after all look what happened to Piers Morgan.

More GC:

Obviously problem – people in Salt Lake mow their lawns and then bring their cutting all the way unto the Timpanogos to dispose of them.

The Civil War. Now there is another phrase I dearly love. That is a true oxymoron if I’ve ever heard one: “Civil War.” Do you think anybody in this country could ever really have a civil war? “Say, pardon me?” (shoots gun) “I’m awfully sorry. Awfully sorry.”

So maybe it’s not the politicians who suck; maybe it’s something else. Like the public. That would be a nice realistic campaign slogan for somebody: “The public sucks. Elect me.” Put the blame where it belongs: on the people. Because if everything is really the fault of politicians, where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans who are ready to step in and replace them? Where are these people hiding? The truth is, we don’t have people like that. Everyone’s at the mall, scratching his balls and buying sneakers with lights in them. And complaining about the politicians.

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.

I’m completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. These two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.

I don’t like ass kissers, flag wavers or team players. I like people who buck the system. Individualists. I often warn people: “Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, ‘There is no “I” in team.’ What you should tell them is, ‘Maybe not. But there is an “I” in independence, individuality and integrity.’” Avoid teams at all cost. Keep your circle small. Never join a group that has a name. If they say, “We’re the So-and-Sos,” take a walk. And if, somehow, you must join, if it’s unavoidable, such as a union or a trade association, go ahead and join. But don’t participate; it will be your death. And if they tell you you’re not a team player, congratulate them on being observant.

In the latest blow for free speech, the government of the southern Indian state of Karnataka has passed

Snowbird Oktoberfest

legislation that makes it illegal to upload, share, or like content with a view to hurt religious sentiments knowingly or unknowingly.

Back in June, Karnataka police warned citizens about the type of things that were covered by the Information Technology Act:

Citizens are warned not to upload, modify, resend (forward) and like (share) malicious or misleading images, videos and messages through any medium with a view to hurt religious sentiments knowingly or unknowingly. Citizens are encouraged to inform the Police Control Room at…

Tuesday – warm and sunny.

American pinkle water at Snowbird Oktoberfest

Why do the top of my legs feel like they’ve been through a mangle. A mere 1 mile and 1,100 feet yesterday. I thought I was fit.

Must be the walk down. Steep and constant braking to avoid those edges.

Run around day. Wendy’s packing and I’m doing last minute tasks; storing bikes and chairs; returning faulty hiking boots.

Now that’s another thing we so love about America. My new hiking boots had a nobble drop off the sole. Only had them 3 months so I take them back. In typical British fashion I’m all ready with the arguments and have Kurt’s phone number on seed dial ready for a court case.

But no it’s so simple. Guy apologises. I can have money back or replacement, no problem. Drops peg legged on the floor. Admits that they’ve had the odd problem with these and recommends a replacement with a vibram sole. Mine were $80, vibrams are $120. Play the destitute pensioner card. He offers a deal at $96. Hmm… and argh, try them on. “Go on then, I’ll pay the extra $16”. Guy “No go on you can have them as a straight swop”.

What cracking service and a $120 pair of hiking boots for only $80. Impressed.
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10154559048370249

Drop of the Enterprise car, a nice Suburu Outback, less than half the price of a Hertz mobile. Enterprise drop me off at hertz to pick up my car. Hertz are twice the cost of Enterprise but they have no one way fee. No one there at hertz they’ve had a power cut. Have to chase them up. Another nail in their coffin.

Snowbird Oktoberfest

In the evening we pop round to Rick and Lynda’s to drop off concert chairs and coolbox. No time to stop for a drink with them as we’re off to Todd and Nancy’s for drinks. They live in a gorgeous place up in Deer Valley. And when I say up I do mean it, need the oxygen masks. Have a lovely evening, they’re so easy to get on with it’s as if you’ve known them for ever.

Must say it’s a real American trait this friendliness and openness. So easy to make friends, a much more friendly and caring society.

More GC:

Timpanogos cave – Hal at the top

Boy, these conservatives are really something, aren’t they? They’re all in favor of the unborn. They will do anything for the unborn. But once you’re born, you’re on your own. Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception to nine months. After that, they don’t want to know about you. They don’t want to hear from you. No nothing. No neonatal care, no day care, no head start, no school lunch, no food stamps, no welfare, no nothing. If you’re preborn, you’re fine; if you’re preschool, you’re fucked.

I don’t understand why prostitution is illegal. Selling is legal. F..king is legal. Why isn’t selling f..king legal? You know, why should it be illegal to sell something that’s perfectly legal to give away? I can’t follow the logic on that one at all! Of all the things you can do, giving someone an orgasm is hardly the worst thing in the world. In the army they give you a medal for spraying napalm on people. In civilian life you go to jail for giving someone an orgasm.

There are over seventeen thousand golf courses in America, they average over one hundred and fifty acres a piece. That’s three million plus acres, four thousand, eight hundred and twenty square miles. You could build two Rhode Islands and a Delaware for the homeless on the land currently being wasted on this meaningless, mindless, arrogant, elitist, racist, there’s another thing; the only blacks you’ll find at country clubs are carrying trays. And a boring game. A boring game for boring people. You ever watch golf on television? It’s like watching flies f..k!

Visit Comcast store – abandon hope all yea who enter here.

Inside Timpanogos cave

Me: “How do I terminate my Comcast account?”

Bimbo: “I don’t understand your question. What’s your address?”

Me: “Well how’s my address going to help is there some psychic mind reading artificial intelligence in your address database? Or am I speaking a foreign language and there’s a translation service in your address database?”

Bimbo: Look of total confusion and despair.

Me: “Look. Let’s try another way. How do of cancel my account? On the basis it took 4 days to set up I’m anticipating a major traumatic experience. Can I just bring my equipment in and jobs a good un?”

Bimbo: “Yes that’s all you need to do.”

Terminate obviously no longer a word in the English language or is it just another product of Utahs education system?

Wednesday – warm and cloudy. A fitting day to be leaving.

Inside Timpanogos cave

We leave today. Sad, but we’ll be back.

Finish off last minute packing. Gird me loins and return equipment to Comcast. Amazingly turns out easy. 4 nightmarish days to get set up and 4 minutes to terminate, sorry cancel. Seem to have got it wrong somehow.

Go round to Carol and Hal’s for lunch and to drop off two black bags of winter gear. Our bikes and skis are in the garage at our winter 2015 home. Say our sad goodbyes. They’ve been such good friends and we’ve had great times with them.

Then it’s off down to Salt Lake airport in our luxury Chevy Impala from Mr Hertz. Mind you the way they’re shaping up these days I think I’ll be using Enterprise more in future. Fewer problems and half the price.

Packing ready for home.

Drop heavy luggage off with Sky Captain. Yes you have to tip but no queue and they’re less picky about the weight, the dollar rules.

Abandon hope all yea. TSA pre-checked so at least we kept our underwear on. No lounge and not a decent sandwich to be seen, looks like we’ll starve. I’d rather hand out bacon butties to the taliban than suffer Delta’s food.

In cattle class, so it’s two sleeping tablets, a few glasses of red and I’ll be asleep like a log. Cheaper solution than business class.

Timpanogos cave – view towards Salt Lake.

Good news on these sleeping tablets apparently there have been reports of people doing things while they are asleep after taking this medicine that they do not remember when they wake up. These include sleepwalking, ‘sleep-driving’, making phone calls and preparing and eating food. These events may be more likely if you drink alcohol.

“Preparing food”, that’ll be a novel first for me.

Fear not Wendy’s promised to pinch me awake if I suddenly make a somambulant dash for the on board galley.

On board and this geezers rattling away in French. Looks like we’re going to Paris. Meanwhile for our entertainment we get to see the spatially unaware numpties try to get their giant oversized travel trunks into the handbag sized overhead lockers. For Chione’s sake it’s not a Tardis on there.

More GC:

And you might have noticed something else. The sanctity of life doesn’t seem to apply to cancer cells, does

Timpanogos cave.

it? You rarely see a bumper sticker that says: “Save the tumors.” Or “I brake for advanced melanoma.” No, viruses, mold, mildew, maggots, fungus, weeds, E. Coli bacteria, the crabs. Nothing sacred about those things. So at best the sanctity of life is kind of a selective thing. We get to choose which forms of life we feel are sacred, and we get to kill the rest. Pretty neat deal, huh? You know how we got it? We made the whole fucking thing up!

Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. It will not be with jack-boots. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Germany lost the Second World War. Fascism won it. Believe me, my friend.

Here’s some bumper stickers I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child whose self esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.” “We are the proud parents of a child who has resisted his teachers’ attempts to break his spirit and bend him to the will of his corporate masters.” “We have a daughter in public school who hasn’t been knocked up yet.” “We have a son in public school who hasn’t shot any of his classmates yet. But he does sell drugs to your honor student. Plus he knocked up your daughter.” “We are the embarrassed parents of a cross-eyed little nit-wit who at the age of ten not only continues to wet the bed but also shits on the school bus.”

Well it’s airport day today so I thought this rant from George Carlin might help set the tone for the day:

Timpanogos cave – frightening views.

The British cleric suspected of radicalizing dozens of Islamic State recruits, including the man believed to have beheaded American journalist James Foley, called jihadists “noble,” and predicted Shariah law will soon rule the West.

Anjem Choudary, whose extremist group Islam 4 UK was banned under a terrorism crackdown, praised Britons who have traveled to Syria and Iraq to fight for Islamic State and said he hopes Shariah Law takes hold in the United Kingdom in an interview with FoxNews.com.

“If Muslims go anywhere in the world to defend their brethren, this is a good thing. Of course it should be permitted to go and fight,” said Choudary. “Anyone who goes and stands alongside them [the fighters in Iraq] is noble. In anyone’s book it is the right thing to do.”

Choudary, 47, denied motivating the Islamic State member known as “Jihad John,” and suspected of beheading Foley, to join the group and even suggested video of the gruesome act, released on Aug. 19, was fake.

British Prime Minister David Cameron has called Choudary “one of those people who needs to be looked at seriously in terms of the legality of what he’s saying because he strays, I think, extremely close to the line of encouraging hatred, extremism and violence.”

So why is he stilling living here on our benefits system? Grow some gonads and kick him out.

Thursday – hot and sunny.

All flights were good and on time. Think the long overnight to Paris and then a 90 minutes to Manchester works better than the Salt Lake to Atlanta then Atlanta to Manchester. Arrive home mid afternoon but that’s no bad thing as you have less time to stay awake.

Well the sleeping tablets and red wine regime worked. 5 hours good solid sleep nothing disturbed me. Can’t remember eating my dinner, it’s a complete blank, and Wendy says I was rambling away to myself much to her annoyance. Good news is I didn’t try and do any cooking.

Devastated, apparently I’ve lost one of those dam flight socks whilst I was in my rambling coma. Oh dear, how sad. I’ll have to take agues next time as to which legs going to get the DVT.

Well it’s 6 weeks at home now. Mustn’t comment on the weather here in Belthorn or complain or else my minder won’t feed me.

GC again:

Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

Rights aren’t rights if someone can take them away. They’re privileges. That’s all we’ve ever had in this country, is a bill of temporary privileges. And if you read the news even badly, you know that every year the list gets shorter and shorter. You see all, sooner or later. Sooner or later, the people in this country are gonna realize the government does not give a f..k about them! The government doesn’t care about you, or your children, or your rights, or your welfare or your safety. It simply does not give a f.k about you! It’s interested in its own power. That’s the only thing. Keeping it and expanding it wherever possible.

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.

When it comes to God’s existence, I’m not an atheist and I’m not an agnostic. I’m an acrostic: the whole thing puzzles me.

The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful insurance companies, there are six or seven information centers, but if you want a bagel there are 23 flavors. Because you have the illusion of choice.

Now we know why the Terrorist threat alert has been raised to severe:

The terrorist group al-Qaeda has published a manual in which it encourages followers to bomb British targets including Sandhurst, the MI5 headquarters and high profile department stores.

The media arm of al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula (AQAP) this week published a nine-page how-to guide in its English-language magazine on making car bombs and suggests terror targets in the UK and the US.
The publication suggests jihadists target the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst, Thames House in London and department stores during Friday prayers, so as to avoid harming Muslims.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

20140817 – Flying Aces (don’t try this at home); Scuba in a hot tub; Busy, busy week.

Posted on August 24, 2014 by admin

Sunday – hot and sunny.

Flying aces stunt show at the Olympic Park.

Pleasant morning, coffee and wifi on the deck before the sun comes around.

Then a scream goes up “Oh Tony. Aghh……..”. Apparently our friendly squirrel has just managed to get in the house and given Wendy a fright of her life as she sees this grey thing streak out the house. Fortunately it did run out or we would have had some fun evicting it.

After an early lunch for you know who (Wendy), Hal, carol and Angela pick us up and take us to the Flying Aces Show at the Olympic Ski Jump

Olympic park.

Park. What a cracking afternoons entertainment – see pictures. After we go and watch the bobsleigh – on wheels in summer – come down at about 65 mph. You can have a go on the toboggan for $75 and for $100 they’ll teach you how to come down on skis and into the pool. Belly flops on skis are optional and probably very painful.

A flying ace. Look no strings.

Five reasons all computers are male

They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.

They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.

As soon as you commit to one you realize that, had you waited a little longer, you could have obtained a better model.

In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.

Summer toboggan run only $75!

You know the other evening when I was getting me over dose of music on steroids at the Mormon Tabernacle choir thingy and me bottle of Merlot had all evaporated I got to thinking.

Would I like to live in the paradise of an Islamic state with full-blown sharia? I mean the self-proclaimed State of ISIS or IS as they like to be called these days, inhabited and controlled by jihadists who want to turn the clock back by at least 1000 years.

What sort of chucklehead would want to trade this awesome life here in Park City for a life of medieval barbarism on the promise, by some smooth tongued inman, of a fairy tale of some big breasted virgins and rivers of wine in an afterlife.

Come to that would you want to trust someone who believes such nonsense, or only lives a righteous life because of such a promise or fear, rather than doing it because they believe it to be intrinsically good.

Perhaps the Merlot fumes got me, but I know my answer.

Monday – hot and sunny.

Anglo American Bobsleigh team.

Lazy morning. Nip into town to the supermarket. On the bus with Wendy, now that’s lazy.

After lunch Jewlee, Jerome and Britain pick us up and we set off to the Homestead crater for a dive.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154532606615249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1

Afternoon tea at the Blue Boar Inn. A very up market, posh, Swiss style hotel and restaurant. Has to be the best Assam tea I’ve ever tasted.

I degaussed my girlfriend last week, and I’m just not attracted to her anymore.

Smash forehead on keyboard to continue…

Error. Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue…

Press any key to continue or any other key to quit…

Press every key to continue…

Getting ready to dive.

While I’m in the mood for a good rant about computers and nerds lets tackle a few of my other 568 pet hates:

Send you an email telling you statement is ready. Zero balance etc. Why not just tell you how much in the email?

Can’t send them an email have to fill in their inane form asking for everything. Then you’ve no record and they don’t bother to respond.

Insist on you logging in to view anything, such as Home Exchange possibilities. They’re supposed to be promoting my home. Can you imagine

Final safety review and equipment check – BWARF.

Asda, Costco or any store insisting that you log in before you can browse their products. No not these dimwits. Then when challenged as to why. Well it’s security. How can it be security. It takes all of 2 minutes to set up an account and anyone can do it and lie. To Make matters worse if I want to acknowledge an email invite I have to log in. Hang on they sent me the email!

Tuesday – grey and rainy.

Blue Boar Inn at Midway.

Rain on and off for most of the day.

Good chance for a relaxing day hunkered down. Get me Dreamweaver out and set about updating me website. Nerdy paradise. Finally get our Home Exchange photos up to date, start on a revamp of whole site and build in some SEO. Just love talking dirty.

In the evening there’s a free demo on bike maintenance just around the corner from us so off I peddles. Some interesting info on mountain bike but not really much use on “how to”. Really all about trying to sell you on bike build / selection service he provides. Can you believe there are people with so much money and so devoid of any intelligence that they go to this guy who tells them what to wear, ride, bike pump and colours. That’s Park City for you.

Four fonts walk into a bar. The bartender says “Hey… get out! We don’t want your type in here!”

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

Put to scale, the head of a spinning disk drive is like a 747 jumbo jet flying at Mach 4 at an altitude of 1/4″ over the rocky mountains.

Wednesday – hot and sunny.

Local sports centre, just 5 minutes around the corner. Not a bit like Shadsworth.

Hi ho, hi ho it’s off to work we go. 3 hours on the mountain for both of us. Smile. Be nice. Keep thinking of the free ski pass and apparently we get ski lessons for $1. Now ain’t that awesome. My last ski lesson was in Livigno in 1968, with this greasy Italian geezer who we didn’t understand a word of.

Have a nice day.

Called off due to forecast rain. Oh dear how sad.

It seems that once we’d got the email to not work, the rain stopped and the weather picked up despite the dire forecast. By lunch time it was lovely again.

Wendy went with the Schmitt’s to the Farmers market, while I went to me Gentle Yoga. Definitely American Yoga. How can you tell? Well the intructoress kept telling everyone to “keep breathing”.

By late afternoon we’re sat out on the patio having afternoon tea in the scorching sun.

Moral of the day. Ignore the forecast and get on with life.

Bloody germans

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10152583489987340&set=vb.648477339&type=2&theater

Don’t you just love the daily PASSWORD HELL that the 10 year old numbskull programmers are allowed to inflict upon us because they have not a jot of common sense nor ideas on customer service. Here’s my list:

Won’t accept last pass input.

Won’t accept iCloud input.

On the telephone, I have to speak to your wife she’s the account holder. My response tends to be either, “This is Mrs Edwards speaking. I can’t help it if I have a thyroid problem. Would you like me to send you a picture of my left breast.” or “Just a moment there’s a women walking down the street I’ll ask her in to talk to you for me.”.

Password must contain….. The list is endless. Perhaps they might add a 12 digit prime number to really spice things up.

Must be so long, 6 or 8 or 12 or 20…. Why not go the whole hog and ask for an infinite long one.

Username does not allow an email. You then spend the next 3 hours trying to identify a username that’s not already been taken and you know you’ll never remember. Now this really curdles me blood and wherever possible I just don’t bother signing up. Do they not realise that having to remember a password is bad enough, now I have to remember some crap username that has restrictions on size, content and uniqueness. Email addresses are unique and easily remembered.

Enter credit card number and then operator asks you for it as well. Does your telephone system suffer from Alzheimer’s.

Local sport centre.

Barmy additional security questions. What is your favourite book, film, food, first teacher, pet, character. Do they not realise these are not absolutes. They change with time. Ask absolutes that cannot change.

I wouldn’t mind half the time they’re for sign up to some mundane website that has no confidential or financial data, such as Knitting patterns, nerds daily.

Oh and don’t write your password down! Do these chuckleheads not realise that I have enough problems remembering what I had for breakfast so there’s no way I can remember 88 different passwords and usernames.

Perhaps one day someone will solve this problem. If only Apple would get there arse in gear and use their finger print Id on the iPhone 5 to achieve 2 factor authentication. What a great solution that would be. Something I have and something I know. Simples.

Thursday – warm and sunny. With some light rain showers early on.

Our local sports centre pool.

I’m mountain hosting for 3 hours and then archery at the NAC, while Wendy cleans out bed pans at the hospital.

Get a decent bike ride in.

Then in the evening we get “The Wolf of Wall Street” DVD out as a freebie (my sort of word) from Red Box. Came highly recommended by Kurt. Actually by now I should know better than to go on his tastes. Thought it was 3 hours of mediocrity. At least it wasn’t a Tarantino crapic.

Time for some pearls of Wisdom from the late George Carlin

I don’t have pet peeves. I have major psychotic hatreds.

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.

The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post “Thou shalt not steal,” “Thou shalt not commit adultery,” and “Thou shalt not lie” in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.

National Ability Centre archery range.

We’ve got about 12 states we’ve never visited. I’ve been canvassing opinions on why we should go to some of them and have really struggled finding anyone who has anything positive to say about the 4 below.

Some orgasmic reasons why we should visit the following states:

North Dakota

World’s tallest stack of empty oil cans (45 feet).
Geographic entree of North America.
Salem Sue the World’s largest Holstein cow.

Sourth Dakota

Wall Drug Co, Wall.
Mitchell Corn Palace, Mitchell.

Nebraska

Carhenge, an auto inspired version of Stonehenge.
World’s biggest ball of stamps (600 pounds).

Oklahoma

Cow Chip throwing capital of the World – presided over by King Cow Chip, a 15 foot fibre glass beaver.

They sound as popular as a pork chop in a synagogue. I think we’ll put them at the bottom of our list for now.

Friday – warm and sunny.

Lazy morning followed by a trip to the mountain with the Schmitts. We’ve about 12 free tickets left so Angela can do some rides and there’s still plenty left over for them for the rest of the season.

https://www.facebook.com/tony.w.edwards/posts/10154536696900249

In the evening the Schmitts and Randy come round for a farewell dinner. A sumptuous feast and a great opportunity to use up the remnants of our freezer. Evening’s entertainment is provided by Angela who does a dance and song routine, but only after a warning that “please turn off all mobiles, no talking, no flash photography and no dancing with the girls. 5 years old going on 40 – don’t know where she gets it all from.

20140811 – Stand Up Paddle Boring

Posted on August 18, 2014 by admin

Monday – warm and sunny.

Mountain host ready to help.

Leisurely morning. Nip to supermarket on the bike. Really only interested in the liquor store but the dam place doesn’t open until 11:00. You’d think these Mormons would be up at dawn. At least get two rides / exercise.

For the first time we manage to find time to sit on our patio with a coffee, book, feathered friends and greedy squirrel, who will probably turn into a giant ball of adipose tissue covered in fur if he keeps on eating bird food at the current rate. He’s also a noisy little chappy, sounds like a rattler. A pleasant morning just relaxing.

In the afternoon we meet Jewlee, Jerome and Britain up on the mountain to enjoy the benefits of free rides. 6 hours later we’ve managed to do the slide, coaster, trampoline and zip line – lightning stopped play for a while. Jewlee managed to do the zip line, despite the look of trepidation, it’s always interesting to see that look as they get nearer the front of the queue. One more off her bucket list.

Then it’s back home for dinner and some much deserved wine after a long but enjoyable afternoon. Really had a great time with Jewlee,

Jerome and Britain do the alpine slide.

Jerome and 5 year old Britain was so well behaved with impeccable manners. It seems to be a characteristic of American kids.

Another great day here in paradise.

A quick inside view of a Mormon Wedding. Apparently they’re a very brief affair and the food served is unbelievable. The most popular wedding meal is Cheesecake and gummy bears. Can you believe it? Certainly cuts down on the costs. But as one web site says don’t come to the wedding hungry, you’ll probably starve to death.

I think it’s about time we started having a laugh at the expense of me and my fellow nerds. They’ve a lot to answer for with their flimsy bug ridden code, confusing, common senseless human interfaces that even a flock of Gibbon Monkeys randomly typing could do better and web sites flung together with zero thought or testing. Nothing works these days – not like when I was a lad.

Don’t despair if you don’t get them all. They are rather nerdy.

Why programmers often mix up Halloween and Christmas?
Because OCT 31 = DEC 25

The box said ‘Requires Windows 95 or better’. So I installed Linux.

Roses are #FF0000, Violets are #0000FF.

%20… the final frontier…

Jewlee finally makes it to the bottom.

Words of wisdom from the Daily Blood Boiler, AKA The Dail Mail.

“Western leaders, as a whole, remain in denial about what is occurring in Muslim countries because it exposes their past analysis as catastrophically naive – but Islamic State can be defeated

The West still refuses to acknowledge that in this region, religious revolution is a far greater evil than undemocratic government.

David Cameron’s head was turned three years ago by the cheers of Libyans celebrating Gaddafi’s fall. Today, they are sheltering from the bandits that now run the country.

If Cameron, of course, had had his way last year, Britain would now be engaged on the same side as Islamic State, fighting President Assad’s regime in Syria. But, then, the British Prime Minister is merely one egregious example of collective folly.”

One of Pat Condell’s rants from 2012. Nothings changed. Hamas are still out for genocide of all Jews.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FWp2ei_x10#t=0

Tuesday – warm and sunny.

Forecast for 85% chance of rain, but we ignore it.

Alpine slide at PCMR.

We both have a leisurely bike ride down, and down is the key word here, to Kimble Junction.

Starbucks and lunch for Wendy. Then an expensive visit to Wholefoods. They really should change their name to Dearfoods, but they do good foods and salads.

Wendy catches the bus home. It’s uphill you see. Payback for the easy ride down. Not only do they let bikes on the buses but the driver even helps you get them on. Can you imagine that in Blackburn?

For me it’s the long slog back up. Good exercise.

As for the rain, it just never happened, yet again, so it was a pleasant afternoon tea on the deck.

Homer tries to buy a gun.

Our friendly squirrel who sounds like a rattle snake.

There is no place like 127.0.0.1.

Girls are like Internet Domain names; the ones I like are already taken.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

I’m not anti-social; I’m just not user friendly.

My Software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

Arab scientists have invented a time-travel device that can transport an entire country back to the middle ages.

They’re calling it ‘Islam’.

Wednesday – warm and sunny.

Well Wendy’s crook again with UTI.

The Racquet club and golf course (our estate) from the top of PC hill.

Women’s problems. Bad female plumbing design if you ask me. Perhaps it’s a product of creationism, certainly lacks intelligent design.

I go for me hike up PC Hill while Wendy’s off to see the sawbones. She’ll be getting a bulk buying discount along with an invite to the Christmas staff party at this rate.

https://www.facebook.com/tony.w.edwards/activity/10154511308000249

Afternoon spent in relaxing as there’s rain forecast, but yet again it turns out dry and pretty sunny. It’s a Dreamweaver afternoon, I get out one of my favourite toys and get back into updating my website. Nerdy joy. When will I ever get any reading done at this rate.

PCMR from the top of PC hill.

The glass is neither half-full nor half-empty: it’s twice as big as it needs to be.

Passwords are like underwear. You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them. You should change them regularly. And you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers

Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.

If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. Weinberg’s Second Law

A real classic. We need more of this:

A devout Arab Muslim entered a black cab in London. He curtly asked the cabbie to turn off the radio because as decreed by his religious teaching, he must not listen to music because in the time of the prophet there was no music, especially Western music which is the music of the infidel.

The cab driver politely switched off the radio, stopped the cab and opened the door.

The Arab Muslim asked him, “What are you doing?”

The cabbie answered, “In the time of the prophet there were no taxis, so piss off and wait for a camel..”

Panorama from the top of PC hill.

Thursday – hot and sunny.

Rain forecast again but not a smidgen, thank Chione I ignored it. Temperatures are climbing back up again. 90F on our deck.

Sandhill crane family taking a stroll around our estate.

Wendy’s washing and rolling bandages again.

I’m rather perturbed as we seem to be down to the last bottle of wine, so it’s off to the off-license (strange name for it, wonder where it came from), liquor store makes so much more sense. The really great thing here is if you want something you either walk, cycle or if you’re truly lazy catch the bus. There’s something refreshing and novel about getting on your bike and “nipping” into town – oh how I’ll miss it. On top of which it’s oh so healthy. At 6,500 feet it gets the red blood cells multiplying.

Hummingbirds have arrived.

Followed by my usual mountain bike ride, coffee and papers in the hospital lounge, followed by archery at the NAC. Todays target is the Sherrif of Nottingham, Captain Hook and some villain who I can’t name from Aladdin. I still really worry that this will turn these kids into mass killers if they ever get their hands on an automatic rifle.

Well dip my balls in sweet cream and squat me in a kitchen full of kittens, Blackburn council have finally exercised a modicum of common sense with free parking Saturday and weekdays after 15:00. Now all they have to do is get it in their thick skulls that Blackburn is still a dump and people need every incentive possible to encourage them to visit. Still one small step in the right direction.

Failure is not an option — it comes bundled with Windows

JUST SHUT UP AND REBOOT!!

Software is like sex: Its better when its free.

Don’t know who said it but it just about sums things up:

“Western civilisation faces an enemy that it is still too timid and too polite to confront in earnest. This is an enemy that rejects progress in all its forms, dehumanises women, exults in death and recognises no borders. Its international reach was never more terrifyingly evident than on 9/11, but it is if anything more deeply embedded in western societies 13 years later.”

Friday – hot and sunny.

Wendy having lunch yet again. She’s obsessed with this eating at lunch time, costs me a fortune.

Well it should be hike day but Wendy’s not up to it.

For a change we catch the bus up to the Deer Valley ponds for Wendy’s lunch, whilst I try this Stand Up Paddle Boring (SUP) craze that seems to be sweeping America.

In case of an emergency I’m given that life jacket thingy around my waste. If I fall off and knock myself out, all I have to do is pull a yellow rip cord and I’ll float face down in the water and expire before the mormon gators get me

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154521166040249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1

Perhaps on the ocean, surrounded by sharks, it may have slightly more zing to it. Here in PC, on a lake with not even a Mormon alligator or water snake to be seen, it just plain boring. Well I’ll try most things once but to do it a 2nd time I have to enjoy it. Guess I won’t be trying this again.

In the evening we go round to Carol and Hal’s for dinner. Good company and great food as always. But all this talk of leaving PC in 11 days time is depressing.

Is the glass half full or half empty?

Yoga American style. Perhaps it’s less boring than SUP.

Optimist: The glass is half full.
Pessimist: The glass is half empty.
Pascal programmers: Well, what type of milk is it?
C Programmers: No thanks, I’ll drink straight from the jug.
Assembly programmers: No thanks, I drink straight from the cow.
Basic programmers: No thanks, I’m still breast feeding.
Pentium users: I drank .499999 glasses of milk.
Mac users: My milk comes with it’s own (proprietary) cereal, bowl, and spoon.

Meanwhile it seems that the religion of peace just hates dogs and thinks they are unclean

It seems that Mo geezer said in one of his many rants: “Whoever keeps a dog, his good deeds will decrease every day by one qeeraat (a unit of measurement), unless it is a dog for farming or herding.”; “Angels do not enter a house wherein there is a dog or an animate picture.”

Meanwhile us infidels don’t fare much better from the koran, the word of allah don’t forget: “Then Those who disbelieve from among the People of the Book and among the Polytheists, will be in Hell-Fire, to dwell therein (for aye). They are the worst of creatures.” (98.6); “Surely the vilest of animals in Allah’s sight are those who disbelieve, then they would not believe.” (8:55).

Meanwhile that fruitcake the Ayatollah Khomeini, who dedicated / wasted his entire life to studying Islam, said that non-Muslims rank somewhere between “feces” and the “sweat of a camel that has consumed impure food.”

Anyway back to the muslim hatred of dogs. Does anyone know where I can rent, borrow, hire or take for free daily exercise a pack of dogs. I thought a nice daily stroll around Audley Range and Whalley Range might be a good desensitising idea. Help our fellow countrymen with their integration into our tolerant multi-cultural society. PS I promise to take a black bin liner, without a slit in it, to scoop up the shit into.

Saturday – hot and sunny.

Yes’ it’s Saturday yet again and we’re both off to be mountain hosts for the day, ready to deal with the great American public. Well I gird me

Mountain host girding his loins and vocal chords with caffeine.

loins, put on a terrifying smile and marshall all me stock, be nice phrases; how’s it going; have a nice day; can I help; any questions; good morning / good afternoon (that really throws them), g’day seems to work better.

After all that biting of my tongue, it’s like a fine porter house steak, after an hours pummelling with a meat tenderiser.

England and America – two countries separated by a common language.

It’s ok for Wendy, she’s so good at it and it comes naturally. 40+ years of nerdiness and never going near the great unwashed public has not prepared me for this. An enlightening experience.

Back home for a quality beer and some wine.

Deer valley from the top of PC hill

5 reasons all computers are female:

No one but the creator understands their internal logic.
The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
The message “Bad command or file name” is about the same as, “If you don’t know why I’m mad at you, I’m certainly not going to tell you.”
Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Well it seems like our leader, Cameron, has finally started to come to his senses with his recent statement: “We are in the middle of a

Mountain blue bird.

generational struggle against a poisonous and extremist ideology which I believe we will be fighting for the rest of my political lifetime.”

Sadly he was only talking about ISIS and the other extremist islamic fundamentalists, but it’s a start. Perhaps eventually he’ll twig that the whole religion of peace is the problem and wake up before it’s too late. All he has to do is to read the koran – yes given all my rants about islam I took the trouble to read it – to appreciate that this immature, barbaric religion is still in the 7th century and will not rest until we’re all muslim drawn back into their barbarism.

Meanwhile I can’t believe the Church of England has accused the Government of appearing to have no “coherent or comprehensive approach” to tackling the rise of Islamic extremism. Yes, the CofE! THE BIGGEST LOAD OF DHIMMIS I’VE EVER COME ACROSS. Really makes my blood boil. They fall over themselves to give away CofE schools to be dominated by the so called religion of peace, all in the name of a do gooder, liberal, multi-cultural, fanatical ideology that has sold this country out to the fanatics and not helped integration one slit in a burka. As a chair of a CofE primary school I was utterly appalled by them.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

20140804 – It’s All Go. Never A Dull Moment. Living The Dream.

Posted on August 11, 2014 by admin

Monday – warm with sunny spells.

Wendy on the way out to Sultan barbecue platform.

Although there’s forecast of a 40% chance of rain we decide to go for a short hike. Catch the bus up to Silver Lake and hike out to the Sultan barbecue platform with awesome views over Jordanelle. Yes, there’s a lovely platform complete with picnic tables, two barbecues and even fire extinguisher.

Set me thinking what would the Blackburn scrots do to this. Well they probably start off by gobbing gum everywhere; followed by some liberal spray painting of graffiti to make up for their lack of colouring books and crayons in their deprived childhood; out would come the knives to try their hand at carving their initials, not that they can spell; the barbecues would certainly be stolen; oh and while we’re at it use the fire extinguisher to put out an imaginary fire. The gypos would come along and help out by taking away all the metal work, “Oh we thought you’d left it out scrapping. We’re only trying to be helpful. Saving you a trip. Why are we so misunderstood?”. Then to finish the job off the scrots would either steal the remaining wood or more likely set fire to it all and the surrounding forests.

Then I realised that none of this would happen because they have to walk 4 miles and they’re too dam lazy.

Barbecues ready, and they’re clean, along with picnic tables.

Call in at Royal Street cafe for a lavish lunch for Wendy.

On the way home Wendy “just nips into the supermarket” (there’s no such thing as a targeted, single purpose, quick trip to the supermarket with Wendy) and I try to buy some of that delicious Paso Robles Merlot, but the greedy brown paper baggers have doubled the price of it. Pass.

It looks like I spoke to soon when I was joking about gluten free beer. Yes, here in the land of opportunity – to make lots of money – they even have gluten free beer. What about wine then? Surely not!

We’re frequently asked by friends, especially our English friends who are a tad sceptical of all things American, why do we spend so much time in America and what is it we like so much. Well apart from the fact that we like to travel, there are many things. When we were hunkered down avoiding the rare rain we decided it was about time we gave this some serious consideration and listed them along with the things we didn’t like.

Jordanell reservoir from the Sultan barbecue platform.

Here goes, the things we like about America:

Americans are so friendly. Just get on a ski lift with them and by the time you’ve got to the top, just 10 minutes, you’ve usually struck up a real rapport, know their life story, political inclinations and complete medical history.

Awesome National Parks.

Service is so much better. Probaly a lot of it driven by the tipping mentality. Yes, I really struggle with it, but I have to admit it does seem to produce better service.

Most things are so much cheaper.

Wine, junk food, mexican food, meat, choice of food are so much better.

With the advent of Starbucks they’ve mainly moved from a country serving brown dishwater as coffee – although you can still come across it – to some excellent coffee.

Parking slots are so much bigger and even though they have the land they’re even better because they’re on an angle and easy to swing you’re giant gas guzzler into.

Their homes and accommodation are so much bigger and open plan.

And to keep a sense of balance what do we dislike:

The American gun culture. Although to be fair as I don’t carry a gun I’m so much safer than anyone who does.

On the way back from Sultan barbecue platform. Anyone notice the before and after bedraggled look.

Prices being shown without sales tax. It’s madness. You have to pay it so why not show it, rather than trying to con your customers. Perhaps it helps the nation improve their maths!

A Catholic priest, a Protestant minister, and a Mormon bishop were discussing when life begins.

“Life begins,” said the priest, “at the moment of fertilization. That is when God instills the spark of life into the fetus.”

“We believe,” said the minister, “that life begins at birth, because that is when the baby becomes an individual and is capable of making its own decisions and must learn about sin.”

“You’ve both got it wrong,” said the bishop. “Life begins when the children have graduated from college and moved out of the house.”

It seems that a man came bursting into Brigham Young’s office, crutches flying. He only had one leg, and he shouted, “Now, Mr. Prophet, I want you to give me another leg this instant. Otherwise, I will publish it abroad that you are not a prophet at all.”

President Young apparently told him that would be easy enough, but that consequences would result. Young explained that if he gave him another leg, it would rise with him in the resurrection – as would the other two legs. That meant the man would have to deal with three legs for all eternity.

The Pope calls Cardinal Dolan on the phone, and he can hardly speak. “Cardinal!! I’ve got some good news and some bad news!!”

The Cardinal says, “Give me the good news first.” The Pope says, “I just got a call from Jesus! It’s the second coming, and he’s on the earth now!!”

Cardinal Dolan says, “But Holy Father, that’s wonderful! What’s the bad news?”

“He called from Salt Lake City.”

Lunch for one at Royal Street Cafe.

Timehop – Don’t you just love repeat posts. Now we can have repeats of all those inane posts written by people who fell out the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. Posts such as:

Name a city that doesn’t have a letter A in it! Doh.

Remember the telephone box on …. street. Wow, that’s really interesting….. What have lampposts and cracks in pavements done to be so ignominiously ignored.

Sayings about dragons with a request to repost.

Swearing and really foul language.

“Send this rubbish on and you’ll receive good luck” – doh.

“Fail to send this rubbish on and you’ll be cast down into hell” – doh, doh.

“Only 1% will send this on”, often followed by “…and I know who you are”. In which case why not send it to just the 1%.

Excessive details on bodily functions or their sex life or lack thereof.

Can u read this crap. The amazing power of the mind.

What kind of dwarf / dessert / psychopath are you?

The Book of Mormon comes to South Park. I’ve heard great things about this musical. Normally I’d rather watch paint flake off the ceiling than watch a musical but I really do want to see this one. Who knows perhaps someone will eventually have the gonads to do a muslim equivalent,

Tuesday – grey, warm and rain.

It’s forecast rain again but sticking with the go for it and ignore it philosophy. It might never happen. Up and out for a MTB ride. Wendy stays at home.

Oh well you can’t win them all, it did rain but I didn’t get too wet.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154477907315249&set=a.10153673070225249.1073741845.621375248&type=1

Get back and Wendy’s sat on the deck sunning herself.

Yippee, we’ve finally finished Dexter. All 8 seasons. It was good but please not a season 9, it would be enough to make you want to splatter your brains over a tiger skin rug.

Mini-rant – Rip off Britain strikes again. A small Starbucks costs about $1.77 or £1.04 in Park City. Yet in the UK the same coffee, except it came from Switzerland (one of the Worlds major coffee growers no doubt), costs about £1.77. Whilst I realise good old ethical Starbucks, who care so much about their social standing and their local communities, have their expensive Swiss coffee and all that tax to pay, you’d think that they’d be able to do the maths that £1 = about $1.68 and not $1.00 (in their dreams).

Q: Why should polygamy be legal? A: Any guy willing to take multiple wives is punishment enough!

Deer Valley – Bald Mountain.

A Mormon Bishop got on an elevator on the 10th floor, (he was heading to the lobby) when on the 8th floor a beautiful woman walked in. (they were alone) On the way to the lobby the gorgeous woman hit the stop button. She turned to the Bishop and said: “Can you make me feel like a true woman?” The Bishop said: “I sure can” and excitedly took off all his clothes, he then threw them in the corner of the elevator. He turned to the woman pointed to the clothes and said: “Now fold them”.

A child at a Christian school was studying the early days of Mormonism in his class. He wrote on his paper, “The early Mormons believed in having more than one wife. This is called polygamy. But we believe in having only one wife. This is called monotony”

Two Mormons were out hunting when they happened upon two beautiful women. They asked the women if they’d like to “fool around.” The women replied, “We’re game!” So the Mormons shot them.

Up to 100,000 Christians and other minority faiths have fled the jihadists who have vowed to purge all “non-believers” and are reported to be carrying out crucifixions and beheadings.

Where is the collective voice of the “moderate peace loving” Muslim communities in Britain, to decry the foul slaughter by fellow Muslims?

Their silences is deafening.

Muslim sensitivity training in South Park. What a great idea, the religion of permanent offence needs to toughen up, grow some calloused skin and remember “sticks and stones….”. PS you need to click the YouTube logo in the bottom right hand corner – looks like allah has some IT skills on YouTube!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAcwzrwsEnc

Deer Valley concert venue from the lift.

Wendy’s on the mountain volunteering. My plans for a hike up Spiro have been scuttled as the trails will be too muddy from all the rain overnight.

After a lazy morning I go to “Gentle Yoga” in the afternoon. Nothing gentle about this. I’ve noticed as the weeks go on it’s got tougher and tougher. Get to feel like a pretzel. And I’m sick to death of that “Downward Facing Dog”, enough to make you yearn for the nearest lamp post.

Pass on the free evening concert at Deer Valley. We’ve no Dexter to watch so need to select a new Netflix series. Try “Hack” but that’s mediocre and seems to have been entirely shot in the dark. Try the Killing. We started to watch it years ago on TV but for some perverse BBC programming reason had to abandon to after a few episodes.

Thursday – hot and sunny.

Well apparently, according to Wendy, there were some violent storms overnight, with lashings of loud thunder and lightning. Missed it all as I

Deer Valley Big Stick and Little Stick ski runs.

was sleeping the sleep of the righteous, yet again.

Wendy’s doing her Florence Nightingale stint, washing and rolling bandages no doubt. I’m going up to PCMR to do my smile and be nice to people stint as a mountain host. What a terrifying thought. Could be painful.

Finish smiling at 13:30 then cycle down to the hospital for free coffee and civilised newspapers. It’s better than an airport lounge, they even come round dishing out free coffee or lemonade. Although sadly the foods chargeable and being Utah there’s no alcohol.

Wendy on Spiro at Park City.

Then it’s down to the NAC for archery. The kids there get such a kick out of shooting pictures of horror movie villains. Next week at least we manage to get Sheriff of Nottingham and Captain Hook.

No free concerts tonight for a change, so it’s a quiet evening in. Unfortunately I’m relegated to sniffing old wine corks out of the waste bin as there’s been a major cock up in the supply of essential vitals – no wine. You just can’t get the staff these days.

The other day we came across some muslim’s. How did we know? Well they wore the hijab, at least the women did. It’s the first time we’ve seen any muslims for months, so quite a culture shock. But the real sad thing is how you immediately look on them with suspicion. Even though they may be moderate muslims – if such a thing really exists.

Thanks to the extreme fundamentalists and all the barbaric violence they perpetrate in the name of islam, it’s really not surprising you feel

Wendy on Spiro – are we there yet?

that way. It’s as bad as looking upon your average German as a Nazi. Whereas most Germans and muslims I’ve met are lovely people. But perhaps when you consider – “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” (Edmund Burke) – you can understand why.

No doubt we all feel a tad insignificant on these issues, but consider – “Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little.” (Edmund Burke).

Women: “Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me”
Man: “Either Way love we’ll be having sex in a minute”

A guy with a gun enters a bar.
“Who had sex with my wife?” he snarled.
A voice was heard in the background, “You don’t have enough bullets mate!”

The NRA’s Newest Marketing Fantasy: Teach the Children “Gun Required”

National Rifle Association suggests we can live up to the Founding Fathers’ ideals by creating “gun-required zones,” and making gun training for children “necessary to advance to the next grade.”

Considers what gun policies the United States would have “if we designed gun policy from the assumption that people need guns — that guns make people’s lives better.”

Sadly this isn’t a joke. Remember “guns don’t kill and maim +30,000 pa, people do”. Now we have “People need guns”.

Pat Condell – Message to Offended Muslims. Another one of his epic rants. Just love them. Lets have more.

Friday – warm and sunny.

My winter office – The Snow Hut.

Set off for a hike up Spiro. Halfway up and it’s non-stop earache from Wendy, “are we there yet?”, “you told me it wasn’t steep”.

Take a shortcut up mountain road to Snowhut, not a smart move. Very steep, yet in winter it’s only a green run. Then across mid mountain and up Mojave and mountain road to Crescent lift and down.

Despite all the moans and groans Wendy makes it. Well done it was worth the effort.

Thankfully wine crisis is over. 2 bottles of Merlot to tide me over.

Unbelievable. I’ve just been stood waiting for Wendy in the supermarket and watching her shop. She really does think she’s in a library,

Wendy on Spiro – nearly there.

browsing the shelves; take it down, read the label; put it back; repeat for everything else on the shelf. 4 minutes later something finally goes in the basket. Next isle; 3 minutes on one section and not a single purchase. Sell by dates need to be in giant letters and shopping carts should have a minimum speed or maximum load period. At the speed Wendy shops most things will be past their sell by date by the time she gets to checkout.

Memo to self, that’s assuming I can remember to read it, never go in a supermarket with Wendy again. It will damage my health and could lead to divorce.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154491374820249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1

It’s all evaporated away, the Merlot that is, must be the altitude. Sadly the concerts not over yet, how will I survive the rest.

Not one waiver to sign; no I don’t have to trade Wendy in for another; I don’t even have to take on more trouble and strifes – imagine two or more shopping in a supermarket together, worse than having my teeth pulled; not one mention of JC (USA); not one mention of JC (Holy Land); no mention of religion of peace. Just left alone to enjoy the music, mind you I did wonder how surrounded we were by Mormons. But at least they wouldn’t try to crucify me if I didn’t convert.

Meanwhile on the way home. American “wasn’t it great? What did you think.”. Me “I thought it was a bit insipid. Not exactly a vibrant choice of music for a a World class choir”. American with dazed look of confusion “but what does insipid mean, we thought it was great”. Hmmm….. I don’t think she had all her choir chairs lined up.

Thistle.

“You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? You need bullet control. Control the bullets, that’s right. All bullets should cost five thousand dollars… five thousand dollars per bullet… You know why? If a bullet cost five thousand dollars there would be no more innocent bystanders.

Yeah! Every time somebody get shut we’d say, ‘Damn, he must have done something … Shit, he’s got fifty thousand dollars worth of bullets in his ass.’

People would think before they killed somebody if a bullet cost five thousand dollars. ‘Man I would blow your head off…if I could afford it.’ ‘I’m gonna get me another job, I’m going to start saving some money, and you’re a dead man. You’d better hope I can’t get no bullets on layaway.’

Even if you get shot by a stray bullet, you wouldn’t have to go to no doctor to get it taken out. Whoever shot you would take their bullet back, like “I believe you got my property.”

That dam religion of peace again. I think I’m just going to ignore anything that relates to islam. We all know what the script is. Wake me up

Wendy makes it to top via Spiro. Now for a relaxing ride down.

when hell freezes over or islam becomes civilised.

40,000 Iraqis stranded on mountain as Isis jihadists threaten death. Members of minority Yazidi sect face slaughter if they go down and dehydration if they stay, while 130,000 fled to Kurdish north.

Meanwhile, that apologist for Hamas, numbskull and little lad that follows round on Camerons shirt tails (Clegg) thinks we should stop selling arms to Israel if the ceasefire fails. Even if Hamas violates it! Yet not a mention of the above tragedy or the daily slaughter of Christians by the fundamentalists of this evil pernicious ideology.

Wake up, have a swig of your favourite tipple, before its too late.

Saturday – hot and sunny.

Park City ski runs from Crescent lift.

Up hosting on the mountain.

It really does expose you to the great American public. Comprehension, reading, listening and literacy skills do worry you. Todays question of the day was “so what’s a queue?”.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154493394100249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1

When we finish we go to the Pickin’ at Park City: A Bluegrass, Brews & BBQ Festival on Saturday, August 9th. Three bluegrass acts, headlined by the nationally-acclaimed The Travelin’ McCourys! And what better way to enjoy FREE bluegrass music than to mix in a craft beer garden and BBQ! Yes, we’ll have some great brews to taste (as long as they’re below 3.5%)

Please, no outside alcohol or pets allowed in the concert venue. This is Utah so guns and automatic weapons will probably be ok!

I would have a beer but a 30 minute queue meant I would have died of dehydration before I got a beer. It was enough to get anyone to take the pledge.

Park City ski runs from Crescent lift.

Have I gone deaf or is this band just a mime act. Mind you I do Van Gogh’s ear for music. Hang on, I can hear Wendy so I’m not mutt an jeff after all. What is the point of a concert with music so quiet it’s drowned out by the sound of a gun sliding out of its holster. Talking of which we had a tyre explode on the plaza today. I’m totally surprised there weren’t 40 guns drawn and 50 people dive for the deck.

Todd and Nancy join us.

Sunday – hot and sunny.

Tour of Utah (similar to the Tour de France but without the French) finishes at Park City.

https://www.facebook.com/parkcitymountainresort/posts/10152315768719226

Yet another weekend of excitement and activity in Park City as it hosts the final stages of the Tour Of Utah. Watch the start and then have a pleasant lunch with Rick and Lynda in the “No Name Saloon”. A very eclectic western style saloon.

And they’re off. Tour Of Utah Bike race.

Brake my second rule of retirement and have a day time Fat Tyre. Even have lunch. One of the best Reubans ever.

Wendy then marauds the stalls for freebies and enters every competition available. She just loves freebies, even though we have absolutely no use for them other than to fill our dustbin with. Mind you if we’re in luck then we’ll probably have at least 8 top of the range road bikes to bring home.

After tea, well dinner for the posh uns, we sit our on the deck. Watch the mountains to make sure they don’t move. It’s warm, sunny and such a pleasant evening. Watch about 9 different types of bird, including an awesome Humming bird and our cheeky squirrel. Perfect end to another perfect day here in paradise. Living the dream!

Alex Jones on South Park on gun control!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9lt9dvJbGM

HEALTH WARNING – LONG RANT ON ANTIBIOTIC RESISTENCE

What the hell is going on?

Tour Of Utah Bike race.

GPs are handing out antibiotics faster than ever for coughs and colds. Harassed doctors are needlessly fuelling the rise of superbugs.

Antibiotic prescribing for minor ailments is up 40 per cent in a decade, suggesting that guidance to combat antibiotic resistance is being routinely ignored. Most patients with coughs, colds and sore throats are given drugs that do them no good yet risk the health of others, the study concluded.

GPs have long been advised not to give out the drugs for minor ailments, which are often caused by viruses, against which antibiotics are useless.

Despite all this 51 per cent of patients with coughs and colds were given antibiotics in 2011. Two thirds of patients with sore throats got antibiotics, usually for no good reason.

Tour Of Utah Bike race.

David Cameron warned last month that the world could be “cast back into the dark ages of medicine” by the rise of antibiotic-resistant bacteria. The rise of untreatable bacteria threatens an “unthinkable scenario” where minor infections could once again kill.

These doctors should know better and refer back to their hippocratic oath “I will prescribe regimens for the good of my patients according to my ability and my judgment and never do harm to anyone”.

Bear in mind that only five new types of antibiotics have been introduced since the 1960s and the supply of newly-developed drugs is dwindling as companies see little profit in working on treatments designed only to be used as a last resort.

Meanwhile we can all help by stopping using anti-bacterial soaps etc:

1 Antibacterial soaps are no more effective than conventional soap and water. 42 years of FDA research—along with countless independent

Tour Of Utah Bike race.

studies—have produced no evidence that antibacterial soaps (triclosan) provides any health benefits as compared to old-fashioned soap.

2. Antibacterial soaps have the potential to create antibiotic-resistant bacteria.

3. The soaps could act as endocrine disruptors. There are worries theycould lead to problems such as infertility, artificially-advanced early puberty, obesity and cancer.

4. The soaps might lead to other health problems, too. There’s evidence that children with prolonged exposure to triclosan have a higher chance of developing allergies, including peanut allergies and hay fever.

5. Antibacterial soaps are bad for the environment.

What Should You Do?

If you’re planning on giving up antibacterial soap—like Johnson & Johnson, Kaiser Permanente and several other companies have recently done, then you have a couple options.

One is a non-antibiotic hand sanitizer, like Purell, which doesn’t contain any triclosan and simply kills both bacteria and viruses with good old-fashioned alcohol. Because the effectiveness of hand-washing depends on how long you wash for, a quick squirt of sanitizer might be more effective when time is limited.

Outside of hospitals, though, the CDC recommends the time-tested advice you probably heard as a child: wash your hands with conventional soap and water. That’s because while alcohol from hand sanitizer kills bacteria, it doesn’t actually remove dirt or anything else you may have touched. But a simple hand wash should do the trick. The water doesn’t need to be hot, and you’re best off scrubbing for about 30 seconds to get properly clean.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

20140731 – Me, upset the muslims? Never. Time for a few comments on the Mormons and the NRA.

Posted on August 4, 2014 by admin

Thursday – warm and sunny. Just right.

The Sandhill Cranes have arrived and strut around.

Lazy morning. Wendy’s volunteering on the mountain, covering one of my duties.

Off at lunch time for a bike ride, followed by my coffee stop at the hospital and then archery at the NAC.

There I am sat at the hospital, relaxing with a coffee after my ride, when all hell breaks loose. It must be Armageddon, sirens and strobing lights – just what an epileptic needs in an emergency. Everyone just sits there in confounded bemusement. Who’s going to be the first sissy to bolt for the exit? The lime green volunteers calmly continue their duties. Well are we about to be burnt to a crisp? I suppose we’re in the right place if the burns units ready.

Relax, 40 seconds later, by which time 10 people could have been trampled to death in a stampede for the exit along with 3 coronaries due to shock, they announce it’s a “code red drill”. Sounds impressive. Would it not have been more use to announce a drill in advance or at least have the lime greens come around, top up my coffee, bring me the daily paper that seems to have disappeared, and tell me to relax it’s a drill.

Of down to archery. These kids get a great kick out of shooting at pictures of gruesome horror characters. Sadly tuition doesn’t seem to be top of the priorities.

Humming birds have arrived at last. Time to get the humming bird drinks machine out.

https://www.facebook.com/tony.w.edwards/posts/10154462469135249

That’s what American democracy has come down to at these town hall meetings: old people and gun nuts, which is a terrible combination. I heard somebody yell ‘AK-47!’ and a lady yelled, ‘Bingo!’

Oh, you need a magazine that holds 30 rounds? Is that in case the deer starts shooting back?

When you’re in a hole, stop digging!

Clash of the Titans. Will there be a ski resort next year? One thing is certain there will be some richer lawyers. Madness.

Turkey’s deputy prime minister was the target of renewed ridicule yesterday after he tried to defend comments in which he criticised women for laughing — by saying that his views applied to men, too.

Bulent Arinc stoked outrage in a country already riven by debate over the role of Islam in public life — and triggered a wave of internet pictures of women laughing in public — when, speaking at the end of Ramadan, he said: “A woman should be chaste. She should know the difference between public and private. She should not laugh in public.”

Elected Muslim mayor is to face trial over claims he committed widespread voting fraud.

Lutfur Rahman, 48, is accused of using illegal tactics to win the mayoral election.

ELECTORAL ALLEGATIONS MAYOR LUTFUR RAHMAN IS FACING:

Voters promised council houses
Told to be ‘good Muslims’ by voting for Mr Rahman
Children of voters given lollipops – halal of course
Council officers bullied and threatened with the sack if they failed to secure votes
Votes were cast in the names of people who were not entitled to be on the electoral register
Numerous postal ballots were stolen and filled in by the same person
Signatures on postal ballots did not match the signatures on application forms previously submitted
A voluntary organisation was given grants in exchange for votes
False allegations were circulated about rival candidate John Biggs, declaring that he was a racist and anti-Islamic
Supporters of Mr Rahman accompanied voters into polling booths and told them who to vote for
Leaflets about Mr Rahman’s political party, Tower Hamlets First, were left in polling booths
Mr Rahman’s supporters were intimidating and made it ‘difficult or impossible’ for voters to get to the polls
Polling station officials folded ballot papers to obscure one of the candidates
Labour votes were crossed out and replaced with votes for Mr Rahman using a different coloured pen

Reading this list you’d think this occurred in some 3rd World barbaric land, but it was in Tower Hamlets, London. Of course once the fundamentalist from the religion of peace have used or abused democracy to get their way, then they’ll inflict Sharia and we can then say goodbye to democracy, freedom of religion or speech, tolerance and civilisation as we know it.

Friday – hot and sunny.

No it’s not lemonade.

Have a ride down to the Mountain Bike adventure park – pretty awesome place with some scary wooden ramps and berms to ride. Save it for another day, ride down Old Ranch Road, some awesome houses with fantastic views of the mountains.

Then it’s a lazy afternoon catching up on reading etc. Finally finish “Executive Treason”, it’s only taken 8 weeks. I suppose that says a lot about the book although the last half of it was quite fast paced.

In the evening we pick up the chairs, cool box with sandwiches and of course a bottle of wine and head up to Deer Valley for the Disney Concert.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154463385480249&set=a.10153673070225249.1073741845.621375248&type=1

Whoops, somehow a smidgen became a whole bottle of luscious merlot. Well it would have been a sin not to finish it off. Great evening, music and butties were awesome, to say nothing of the wine.

One of the Disney clips they show with the music is of “Mickey Mouse – The Band Concert”. What awesome animation, music and imagination. All from the 1930’s, but absolutely timeless. An all time great.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IErXg5kBXXg

A new poll says 60 percent of Americans want stricter gun laws. The NRA calls those Americans “communists”.

NRA fights to maintain gun rights for voices in heads.

I’ll have just a smidgen more. Don’t you just love the stylish wine glass.

Unbelievable. You just have to laugh. The religion of permanent offence is at it again. Is there anything that doesn’t offend them. Perhaps we should also ban clapping, singing dancing, make all women take part in black bin liners and not to forget ban women from laughing. Why do we put up with this religious barbaric nonsense? If they don’t like it don’t come to the games, don’t take part and go back to your cave in some 3rd World hell hole.

The use of the Scottie dogs in the 2014 Commonwealth Games opening ceremony has been branded as “disrespectful” to Muslims around the globe. Dogs are considered “unclean” and cannot be held by people of the faith. However a member of the Malaysian team needed to carry their dog as

Fantastic bike repair stations everywhere. Complete with well designed bars that stick out to brain you as you stand up from tyre pumping. Thank Chione for cycle helmets.

Fantastic bike repair stations everywhere. No doubt a creationist creation, no evidence here of intelligent design. As you stand up you poleaxe yourself on the bars sticking out at the top. Thank Chione for cycle helmets.

he refused to walk after his tartan coat was put on.

The Scottie dogs were used as a symbol of Scotland. Each country had their own dog leading them out and each dog wore a tartan coat. It was supposed to show another traditional aspect from the country, and most countries around the world praised the unique decision.

However, some of the Muslim communities have claimed that it was “disrespectful” and that they deserve an apology. The Malaysian community has been extremely vocal about it, considering a team member had to carry the dog out instead of having the dog walk in front. The Pan-Malaysian Islamic Party believes that the organizers should have been more aware of the religious views and been more accepting of them.

Saturday – warm, a tad humid (unusual) and sunny.

We’re both up on the mountain as volunteer hosts today. Quite busy, but considering there are 80,000 people in town for the Kimble Arts Festival – it’s a bit like Sundance but all condensed into 3 days, manic – it’s not too bad. Mind you why anyone would pay $10 for the privilege of going shopping defies rational belief and should be resisted. In true Victor fashion we pass. After all said if Walmart catch wind of it they’ll be charging for going in their stores.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154466563345249&set=a.10153673070225249.1073741845.621375248&type=1

An all American barbecue. Essential. Every home has one.

After “work” Todd and Nancy give us a lift around to Marcia’s Barbecue. A typical American sort of do, complete with an all American giant gas barbecue, where Marcia has invited friends, family and fellow mountain hosts to a barbie held at the pavilion on a local sports ground. They provide meat and drinks (alcohol not allowed on the sports grounds, well it is Utah) and everyone brings something – a Jacobs join.

A pleasant evening was had. Meet new people. Hear their stories and share experiences and views. What a great life they lead out here.

What in the name of VHF, UHF and Freesat has happened to British TV. We are now down to watching 3 programmes a week. I don’t count East

Dreaming of winter.

Enders, watched by her in doors. Good Chione, if it carries on at this rate we’ll end up watching American adverts with just a smidgen of TV programmes sprinkled in between them to try and re-kindle a few brain cells.

Well that’s it decided for me. When I get home I’m disconnecting my Freesat aerial and watching all TV on BBC iPlayer and other catch up services. Thats £145pa saved for a poor pensioner. It’s no longer worth it. What’s more it’s perfectly legal to do so – see text from TV license site:

“The law states that you need to be covered by a TV Licence if you watch or record television programmes, on any device, as they’re being shown on TV. This includes TVs, computers, mobile phones, games consoles, digital boxes and Blu-ray/DVD/VHS recorders.

You don’t need a licence if you don’t use any of these devices to watch or record television programmes as they’re being shown on TV – for example, if you use your TV only to watch DVDs or play video games, or you only watch ‘catch up’ services like BBC iPlayer or 4oD.”

Using his software how often I wished I could do this.

Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about eleven things they did not and will not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.

Rule 1: Life is not fair – get used to it!

Rule 2: The world doesn’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: They called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

PCMR roller coaster.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were:
So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they’ll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. *This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF.
(Do that on your own time.)

Dreaming of winter.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.

If you can read this…thank a Teacher.

If you can read this in English…thank a Soldier!

Now….think about this and smile. If you don’t agree, go stick your head in the SAND and take a DEEP BREATH!

Question: You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife

Mountain views.

comes around the corner and is running at you while screaming obscenities.In your hand is a Glock .40 and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

Liberal Answer:

Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that is inspiring him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me?

If I’m cooking tonight then enjoy.

Does he definitely want to kill me or would he just be content to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a conclusion.

Rednecks Answer:

BANG!

Texan’s Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click… (sounds of clip being ejected and fresh clip installed)
Wife: “Sweetheart, he looks like he’s still moving, what do you kids think?”
Son: “Mom’s right Dad, I saw it too…”
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Daughter: “Nice grouping Daddy”

A busy day on the mountain.

And you think we’ve got it bad in the UK. It’s just as crazy in Australia. A muslim cleric called Abdul rag head something unintelligible; illegal immigrant; told to get out of Australia 3 times; him, his wife and 7 children lived on social for 19 years, never worked a day and over $1,000,000 in welfare; found guilty of a plot to blow up 1,000’s.

Wake up, have a few swigs of your favourite tipple, before it’s too late. The so called religion of peace has only one goal.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10152480384712716&set=vb.792282715&type=2&theater

Then to add even more stupidity, it was decided not to air this piece on TV. Yes, it seems the Aussies have their fair share of loony liberal PC stormtroopers, stomping in their jack boots on anything that may offend the religion of peace or make us more aware of the problem.

Sunday – hot and sunny.

Dreaming of winter.

I’m on the mountain again covering for Wendy. The Sunday hosts team are the most easy going to work with. Every thing just works like clockwork. Everyone just gets along. No need for lists, timetables, schedules or instructions. Customer comes first.

Sundays also usually a quieter day than Saturday.

As the buses are all to cock, due to the Kimble Arts Festival, I ride in on my bike and arrive as sweaty as a water hogs backside – much too warm. It’s all uphill getting there, evidenced by the ride home not needing any peddle power, all down hill cruising.

There’s something quite refreshing though about riding to work on a bike. Haven’t done that since we lived in Market Harborough back in the 1970’s.

Easy day spent mainly doing surveys. Get to chat with some really interesting people.

In the evening there’s more Dexter. Finally on the 8th season. Just need to manage to stay awake.

RA’s Wayne LaPierre calls for more armed personnel after whatever massacre just happened.

Since gun control is way too wacky of an idea, maybe we should just laminate everyone in Kevlar instead.

So what was it I had for breakfast.

Barack Obama at a recent rural elementary school assembly in East Texas, asked the audience for total quiet. Then, in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands once every few seconds, holding the audience in total silence.

Then he said into the microphone, ‘Children, every time I clap my hands together, a child in America dies from gun violence.’

Then, little Richard Earl, with a proud East Texas drawl, pierced the quiet and said: ‘Well, stop clapping!’

Just watched a programme “Kids and guns”, about America gun culture and it’s impact on children.

Mormon trek statue.

Shows that proud moment when the kid gets their first gun. It’s a family thing. One family buy a .4 rifle for a 4 year olds girls birthday. It kicks like a mule. She hates it. The parents then try everything to get her to like it. What if she doesn’t want to shoot? She’s going to shoot whether she wants to or not, says the Dad.

A 9 year old goes off hunting on his own. Gun goes off accidentally and kills him.

Parents pushing their kids to enjoy guns. Their tradition of guns and hunting to be passed on. Even so called Zombie hunting with their kids.

To put it into perspective +30,000 kids a year are killed or injured from gunshots. But, hey remember the NRA motto “Guns don’t kill, people do”.

Yes we’re in Utah. Home state of the Mormons, but fear not Park city is a haven of sanity, a sodom and Gomorrah up in the mountains, even though we’re surrounded by Mormons. Now for those of you who don’t know about this weird religion (mind you what religion isn’t weird) here’s South Parks take on it.

Yes, you got it. Jesus came to America. How could the USA have possibly missed out on it. No doubt he was probably a bigger and better Jesus than they had in the Holy Land. No doubt it won’t be too long before we hear that Mohamed came to America too. Perhaps there’ll be a new Islam.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

20140728 – Leisurely week; Yeah it’s raining.

Posted on July 31, 2014 by admin

Sunday – hot and sunny.

Our place of work on the mountain.

Yet another day volunteering on the mountain for me. Wendy’s still not so good so she’s relaxing at home. Not quite as hot today and I’m on with the easy crew. No hassle. No timetabled move arounds. Everyone just works together and moves around, takes breaks when they need to and it all just works. Definitely the best crew to work with.

In the evening Lynda comes round for dinner and we have a pleasant evening, good company and good food. In typical American fashion Lynda brings a desert – lime pie, delicious. It seems to be the American norm that you always take a desert, or starter, or something for the meal. We’re starting to get the hang of it.

People who say, “you can’t get blood from a stone”, obviously haven’t cheated on their husband in a Muslim country.

Monday – cooler with some cloud in the morning, rain late afternoon.

https://www.facebook.com/tony.w.edwards/posts/10154446376575249

Never thought I’d say it but the cool, clouds and even the rain are such a welcome change after weeks of sun and heat.

Local “historic” bar.

Try a new ride today. Down to Round Vally and then follow the motorway / auto-route / inter-state down to Kimbal Junction. Stop for a nerdy browse in Best Buy followed by a leisurely Starbucks. Finally manage to identify that beautiful but elusive bird – see last weeks blog. It’s not a new species after al but a Black Headed Grosbeak. Then it’s the long uphill haul back to the Racquet club.

Wendy’s still not right and the UTI seems to be back so it’s a walk round to the sawbones.

The interesting, and what would appear common sense approach, to American doctors surgeries is that a nurse alway, ALWAYS, takes you temperature, blood pressure, weight and height. The vital signs. Seems to make sense to me. What do they take in the UK? A receptionist, who usually seems to think she has the wisdom of 6 years at med school despite not even a GCSE to her name, takes your name if you’re lucky and usually wants to know what the problem is in such a way that everyone in the waiting room can hear – best answer seems to be a few coughs and splutters followed by “A highly contagious form of the the Ebola virus.” That sure helps get you to the front of the queue as everyone flees for the exit.

Now I know this countries a tad obsessive with litigation etc., but this takes the cookie. Wendy takes a urine sample with her as she knows the drill.

Not good enough she has to produce a sample there and then so that they know it’s hers. Hang on why in Chione’s name would anyone want to pay out a $100 and bring someone else urine. We’re there to get a problem fixed. It’s a bit like taking a friends car into the garage to have a problem fixed on your car. A jam jar of urine for a goldfish if you ask me.

Probably even less sour than raw Cranberry juice.

Putting that lunacy aside I have to say the sawbones talked a lot of common sense. Gave her some antibiotics that should do the trick. It turns out the antibiotics our UK Quack had given her contained Septrin. So what you may say. Well, Wendy’s allergic to Septrin. It’s in her notes if anyone troubled to look. She’s had nearly a week of feeling crook due to our quack’s ineptitude.

Anyway back to the common sense sawbones gems of pithy country style wisdom:

1 Don’t take Cranberry tablets they’ve scientifically proven that only Cranberry Juice is effective for reducing UTI. Make sure it’s natural cranberry juice and not some cocktail of whatever slush was cheap when they bottled it.

2 Don’t bother taking pro-biotic tablets. There’s no scientific evidence that they help with IBS. They’re probably made in some filthy cowshed in China, where a guy with a pair of tweezers pops some gunge and probably some sawdust into a capsule. If you read the packets it right, well not about the guy, lunge and sawdust, but they’ve never been FDA tested. Instead try some natural yoghurt.

Listening to him reminded us both of our old family doctor, Dr Masters, she used to talk such natural common sense.

Now he also predicted that he was pretty certain this antibiotic was mild with no side effects and Wendy should be feeling 90% better within 24 hours. We’ll see!

Don’t die a virgin! There are terrorists up there waiting for you.

Actions speak louder than words.
That’s why you don’t need to read the Quran to say that Islam is violent.

Tuesday – clouds and rain.

For the first time since we’ve been here we can’t see the mountains for clouds. What a pleasant change it makes. Looks like we might get a relaxing day in. Who knows may even get to read a book. I’m still on the same book I had when we got her 8 weeks ago. Just don’t get the time somehow.

Great start to the day with fluffy buttermilk pancakes, maple syrup or blueberry sauce and fresh mixed berries. Another great American junk food. Puts hairs on your chest and cholesterol in your blood.

Well Wendy’s starting her glass of Cranberry Juice a day regime. It’s more sour than “Toxic Waste” – another American candy (sweets) delicacy. Probably needs a 2lb bag of sugar in it to make it drinkable. Goodbye UTI; hello obesity and tooth decay. Perhaps she could mix it with a yoghurt.

What is it with American salt? It’s just so much more salty, potent and virulent. A bigger bang for your bucks. Even I have to take care I don’t put too much on.

It’s our first day, in all day, hunkered down – dare I say a pleasant change. Sat like a couple of kids in a caravan at Skeggy / Blackpool watching the rain come persist it down. And of course like everything American it is so much bigger and wetter. If you’re out in it I’m sure you’d drown.

Why did Abu Hamza cross the road?
To get to the second hand shop.

Moves to introduce a new generation of ‘smart guns’ which can only be fired by their owner have been dealt a blow after an American weapons store owner received death threats.

Andy Raymond, the owner of a shop called Engage Armament, had planned to sell the German-made handgun alongside his more typical range of high-powered customised assault rifles.

However, after a wave of anonymous calls from people threatening to shoot him if he put the safer weapon on sale, Mr Raymond has changed his mind and will not stock the weapon in his Maryland store.

There are more than 30,000 firearm deaths each year in the United States and latest figures show 606 people, including 98 children, died when guns were fired unintentionally. Guns do not make a nation safer, say US doctors who have compared the rate of firearms-related deaths in countries where many people own guns with the death rate in countries where gun ownership is rare.

More guns meant more deaths, they found. “The gun ownership rate was a strong and independent predictor of firearm-related death,” says Bangalore. “Private gun ownership was highest in the US. Japan, on the other end, had an extremely low gun ownership rate. Similarly, South Africa (9.4 per 100,000) and the US (10.2 per 100,000) had extremely high firearm-related deaths, whereas the United Kingdom (0.25 per 100,000) had an extremely low rate of firearm-related deaths.

However, the smart gun is being fiercely resisted by pro-gun campaigners who fear it will lead to a crackdown on their Second Amendment right to bear arms.

The obsession and lunacy continues. I can’t see common sense ever creeping in, sadly it’s so ingrained in their culture and psyche.

Laughable. Unbelievable. Here’s why I’ll not be going to Turkey:

Turkey’s deputy prime minister has provoked outrage and derision by declaring that women should not laugh in public, and berating them for spending

too much time on their phones.

Hundreds of Turkish women posted pictures of themselves on social media laughing in response to comments by Bulent Arinc, a founding member of the ruling Justice and Development Party, which is rooted in Islam.

Yet another country heading back towards 7th century barbarism with the so called “religion of peace”. Turkey’s authoritarian prime minister already looks set to expand his powerbase and marginalise rivals within his Islamist political party today by announcing that he will run for president. Chione forbid they should ever become a member of the EU.

Wednesday – Grey, very wet and drizzle.

Well we’re both supposed to be on duty on the mountain for 3 hours. Get there and rains stopped play so we’re sent home. Whopee!

Cheeky chappie.

Call at he bank for some money. American banks are just like UK banks. One employee serving, three stood around doing nothing and customers queuing up.

Then it’s Fresh market for some “incremental shopping”. Oh blessed are the poor with their shopping bags full waiting in the rain for the bus home – how un-American can you get.

It’s another day hunkered down. Today it’s just that very wet drizzle.

Chance to read a book at last and update the blog. Hopefully I might get the book I started at the beginning of June finished and my American History book.

Got quite a few books lined up, including the bible, having read the koran I thought it only fair and balanced to read the other best seller. Also got a Life of Mo to read; another American history book; along with two Pat Condell irreverent rant books; a Jeremy Clarkson rant; a Bill Maher irreverent rant; two physics books; a nerdy book on PHP and Javascript, looking forward to that one; a HTML5 and CSS3 book, nerdy again; along with Gigabytes of novels. Thank Chione for the Kindle. Yes, I know there’s something about a real book but at £50 per extra suitcase, per flight, the Kindle and iBooks save a fortune. That lot should keep me busy for the next year. Really must find more time to read.

Started doing the blog in raw HTML on WordPress. All the so called WYSIWYG blog editors I’ve used are more flaky than a pack of Jus-Rol puff pastry. Gives you so much more control, none of the problems and not really that much more difficult. Plus a real plus is that you can easily add captions to your photos.

For now that’s enough poking fun at Islam, they provide a rich source of fundamentalist lunatics, and we all know they need to get a sense of humour. I do my bit to improve their sense of humour with some desensitising therapy. Probably already have a few fatwas against me, so let’s turn to another organisation that will probably put a contract out on me. Yes, it’s the turn of the NRA and the gun lobby:

Thousands of dead fish have now washed up on shore along the coast of South Carolina. Today the NRA said that this wouldn’t have happened if those fish had guns.

One failed attempt at a shoe bomb and we all take off our shoes at the airport. School shootings galore and no change in the regulation of guns

One Million Moms is a christian morality campaign. The group writes in a ‘call to action’:

The late night programming on the Cartoon Network, known as Adult Swim, plans to air the non-animated show Black Jesus portraying Jesus as a black

Our daily visitor.

guy living in the hood. The show depicts him living in Compton Gardens and makes a mockery of our Lord. The foul language used in the trailer, including using the Lord’s name in vain, is disgusting. In addition, there is violence, gunfire and other inappropriate gestures which completely misrepresent Jesus. This is blasphemy!

Black Jesus is set to premiere on August 7 at 11:00 pm ET/ 10:00 pm CT, unless we intervene. Adult Swim plans to blaspheme Jesus on a weekly basis. This mockery will be similar to South Park and Family Guy , but much worse since the entire program will be based on lies about Christianity.

1MM will defend our Savior because He is Holy! Adult Swim is obviously not a family network, and this program is set to air later in the evening when children should be asleep, but that is no excuse. Adult Swim has crossed the line by belittling the Christian religion with foul jokes.

We need to send a loud and clear message to Adult Swim, its owner Turner Broadcasting System, Inc. (a Time Warner Company), and all potential advertisers of Black Jesus that this kind of programming is insulting and completely unacceptable. Adult Swim is not ridiculing any other religion currently and wouldn’t dream of mocking Mohammed or Muslims.

Yet again the blasphemy card is played. For a change it’s the Christian religion. Do they really believe that a supreme being, or a son of a supreme being, needs defending against such things. Simple, if you don’t like it don’t watch it, and if enough people ignore it they’ll take it off the air. But I owe 1MM a debt of thanks for making me aware of what may be an entertaining programme – apparently first screens on 7th August.

Who knows perhaps we may even get a Mo version.

PCMR Resort. Will it survive the Talisker assault?

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

20140720 – Road trips; This Is The Place; Jupiter bowl; Heber Creeper

Posted on July 27, 2014 by admin

Sunday – hot and sunny. But thunder and rain at teatime despite forecast to the contrary. Can’t trust them dam weather diviners here either.

Marching band early morning practise session.

A lazy day to recover from the frenetic week we’ve had living the dream. Have a bike ride into town to pick up some bread from the supermarket and that’s about the highlight of the day. Manage to shelter from the short burst of torrential rain. It seems that the weathermen over here are as bad as in the UK. Can’t even predict 15 minutes in advance.

We are not alone. It looks like we’re not the only country to treat their coffin dodgers like vermin or a bunch of inconvenient, incontinent droolers who need to be maltreated and shut up in a 6′ by 3′ hell hole to speed up the arrival of the grim reaper to save them from a living hell.

The US Navy intercepted a boatload of people off the Texas coast today.

This placed the Navy in an awkward position, as the boat was not heading to the USA, but towards Mexico and Central America.

In the good old days when teachers were respected and had the ultimate sanction – a good hiding.

Another surprise finding was the people were white American retirement age seniors. Their claim was that they were trying to get to Central America or Southern Mexico as they wanted to return to the US as illegal immigrants. Then they would be entitled to far more benefits than they were receiving as legitimate American retirees.

It is believed the Navy gave them food, water and fuel and assisted them on their journey.

We are booking on the next boat out. Let me know if you want to join.

Monday – hot and sunny.

Rope making.

Up and out for a stroll around to Hertz to pick up a car. Yes, we’re playing at being American this week, driving a gas guzzler, in the vain hope that the NRA will call off the hit man from last weeks 2nd Amendment rant!

09:00 and the sun is out; there’s a lovely breeze; people are biking, walking, running, smiling and saying hello; even the steam roller driver has a smile and a greeting; there’s the start of a rounders (baseball) game; a marching band is practising in the car park; the American flag is proudly flying and no one is kicking off about it. Chione is up there in FSM heaven making snow ready for winter. All is well with the World.

Where have we gone so wrong as a country?

Pick Carol and Angela up and we’re off down to “This Is The Place” park. Allegedly it’s the place where in 1847 the Mormons arrived after there long trek and escape from persecution in the East – not from muslims I might add. This geezer with a beard, Brigham Young, well I assume he had a beard they always seem to, stuck his stick / staff / rod in the ground and said “This is the place”. The rest is just history, they settled, it became known as Salt Lake city and a state called Utah.

Their religion may be a tad weird, aren’t they all, but they certainly landed on their feet. Now we have Park City, a proper little Sodom and Gommorah in the midst of a religious enclave.

Anyway back to “This Is The Place” it’s a theme village based around the Mormons in the 1850’s. Characters in costume; old buildings; chance to re-

Native American (Red Indians for the rest of us) dancing.

enact life back then, including washing and ironing; school house and lesson; craft shops; rope makers; carpenters; blacksmiths; train rides; pony rides; and of course the obligatory merchandising opportunity in a gift shop. Although to be fair, unlike Disney, you can exit the place without passing through, but you do have to buy tickets there. On the plus side once inside the park it’s all free. On the downside you can’t get a coffee or anything else not approved by the Book of Mormon or the angel Macaroni.

Interesting how yet another religion is obsessed with head covering for women, in bonnets in this case, and separation of boys from girls in school.

A good day out. Angela get’s appointed Sheriff and is on the trail of the baddies at every opportunity.

On the way home stop off for afternoon tea and coffee – no Mormon stricture here – in a pleasant canyon restaurant.

Monday evening free cultural overdose with a Beethoven string quartet.

Monday evening a Beethoven festival in city park – free. Deli string quartet playing. I go for a real cultural overdose while Wendy enjoys herself at the supermarket. Someone has to absorb all this free culture, even if I am a luddite.

A pleasant end to another lovely day.

Jokes don’t kill people.

Muslims who are offended by jokes kill people.

Tuesday – hot and sunny.

Up and out to drive over Guardsmen Pass. Never get a chance in winter as it’s always closed, so quite looking forward to it.

Stop off and go for a walk up to Jupiter Peak. Probably the only time we’ll get up here as it’s serious expert terrain. All double black diamonds.

Top of Jupiter bowl

Just to look down them from the top can stain underwear. How anyone can ski these amazes me. It’s only a short walk, about 3 miles, but takes nearly 2 hours as we’re scrambling up and down loose scree. I’d rather go uphill on that stuff anytime, downhill is an absolute nightmare, makes you feel like a doddering 90 year old. Definitely a two walking pole hike.

Then drive over the pass and down into Big Cottonwood Canyon to have a look at Brighton and Solitude in summer. Well Solitude is aptly named in winter, but in summer it’s worse than a Christian monastery before the ISIS arrive.

Call in the Outlets centre to try and get some hi-tech boxer shorts. No chance they’re obsessed with tight, figure hugging, ball crushing, posing pouches. What ever happened to loose fitting boxer shorts that can let your dangly bits get some fresh air.

Top of Jupiter lift.

What is it with the Japanese visitors. If they’re not wandering around with surgical masks on, they’re in long coats when it’s 95F in the shade. Bizarre.

With a lot of research, the UK immigration officers have come up with the most foolproof plan ever to ensure that the immigrants to the country are culturally, economically and educationally compatible. It ensures greater harmony, seamless integration and lasting peace in the country.

It’s called “the bacon sandwich test”.

The taxman has been censured for “unacceptably poor” management after an IT project with an initial cost of £4.1 billion (nothings ever priced in millions these days) spiralled out of control to cost the taxpayer more than £10 billion. What’s more the contractors were due to take £0.5 billion profit and have so far taken £1.2 billion. Are these politicians stupid? Well we all know the answer to that. To top it all it’s not due to go live until 2017 so there’s plenty of scope for more cost overruns. How can they be allowed to take a profit when they over spent. Whatever happened to

Wending our way to the top of Jupiter bowl. In winter they do this with ski boots and skis on their back.

fixed price contracts, a sure way to focus the minds and control costs.

These mandarins and buffoons can’t even manage to get a simple web page right, mind you no one else can, so there’s no chance on such a mammoth project. Every day I really do despair of the software industry as I suffer their incompetence – leading the pack of incompetents is BBC iPlayer, a shinning example of all that’s bad about this industry. I defy anyone to show me a web page that I can’t find at least one bug on.

Meanwhile I await the 2017 headlines “Tax System in total disarray as new software goes live. Yet another government software balls up with a fourfold overrun in costs.” Oh yea of little faith.

Panorama from top of Jupiter.

Wednesday – hot and sunny.

Pick Angela up and take her with us on a trip aboard the Heber Valley railway down to Provo.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154432136950249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1

Now we know why it’s called the Heber Creeper. It goes slower than an arthritic snail. But it’s a change.

Day out on the Heber Creeper to Provo.

Wendy’s sick, literally, by the time we get to the park at Provo. It seems the antibiotics she’s taking have this bloody awful side affect. Sad really because the main reason for going on the train was because she enjoys train rides.

In the evening I drive up to Deer Valley to catch the free concert. One of the advantages of having a car. Great butties to eat at the concert, but alas no wine. One of the disadvantages of having a car. Wendy has a rest after her exertions shouting for Huey and Ruth.

Thursday – hot and sunny.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154431740900249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1

Despite still being a tad off colour Wendy goes to the hospital to do her Florence stint.

https://www.facebook.com/tony.w.edwards/posts/10154433489130249

I certainly think I need to stop doing the “mad dogs and Englishmen” act by going for mountain bike rides in the midday sun. The heat just drains you.

Wot no concerts tonight! Unbelievable, so it’s a night in with Dexter and that excellent bottle of Merlot. Only down side is that wine makes me nod off through Dexter. Now on season 7, only 1 season left.

This is a speech that allegedly Vladimir Putin made to the Duma:

“In Russia, live like Russians. Any minority, from anywhere, if it wants to live in Russia, to work and eat in Russia, it should speak Russian, and should respect the Russian laws. If they prefer Sharia Law, and live the life of Muslim’s then we advise them to go to those places where that’s the state law.

“Russia does not need Muslim minorities. Minorities need Russia, and we will not grant them special privileges, or try to change our laws to fit

Stunning views from the Heber Creeper train ride.

their desires, no matter how loud they yell ‘discrimination’. We will not tolerate disrespect of our Russian culture. We better learn from the suicides of America, England, Holland and France, if we are to survive as a nation. The Muslims are taking over those countries and they will not take over Russia. The Russian customs and traditions are not compatible with the lack of culture or the primitive ways of Sharia Law and Muslims.

“When this honorable legislative body thinks of creating new laws, it should have in mind the Russian national interest first, observing that the Muslims Minorities Are Not Russians.”

Sadly it’s a hoax. He never said such things. But, isn’t it about time that our Prime Minister was saying these things. Just look at the evil perpetrated by ISIS in the name of this pernicious, so called religion. Look at their treatment of Christians and other religious minorities, not forgetting atheists and followers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Wake up and smell the coffee before it’s too late and is happening here – well Blackburn.

This is what it takes to cancel a Comcast service. Something we have to do in the next few days.

So this weekend, @ryan and I attempted to cancel Comcast over the phone. This is how it went down: https://t.co/5TRpDmWQBU

— Veronica Belmont (@Veronica) July 15, 2014

They have a reputation for the worst customer service in America. I can assure you that it’s a well deserved reputation. Think BT are bad? This Company makes BT look like the Ritz of customer service. I could write a book on just my experience of getting Internet connected. My bloods starting to simmer at the mere thought of having to disconnect.

They’re absolutely fine as long as you don’t have to interact with their employees in the call centre or stores!

Fly fishing.

The British Islamic Association has said there is no longer room for extremists within their mosques.

Although a waiting list has been set up.

Friday – hot and sunny, yet again.

We’re both due on volunteer duty as mountain hosts, but Wendy’s still too ill to go so she stays at home and rests.

It’s another hot gruelling day. Don’t know what it is today but no one seems to be listening today. Everything has to be repeated several times and then they still do the wrong thing. Perhaps it’s the heat distorting the sound waves or the sweat dripping into their ears. The great American public at large.

Day goes pretty quickly and it’s not too busy, despite yesterday being pioneer day.

In the evening it’s the Electric Light Orchestra concert over at Deer Valley but Wendy’s still off colour (what weird expression that is) so we give it a miss.

Is this just not clear evidence of why anyone should not be allowed to drive around with a black bin liner on their head with a small slit in.

POLICE are appealing for information after a five-year-old boy was hit by a car in Blackburn.

The boy suffered a broken leg and was taken to Royal Blackburn Hospital after the collision at around 8pm on Wednesday in Whitewell Place.

Angela swinging away. A good way to get a blister!

The car involved, which was described as silver and driven by an Asian woman wearing a burkha, failed to stop and police are appealing for witnesses and information.

How can you be expected to see in such a garb. Just tunnel vision to match their attitude to tolerance and integration. Perhaps this is why the Saudis ban women from driving after all.

Ban it. You know it makes sense.

Solitude resort. Aptly named not a sole in sight.

Back to American boxer shorts. I finally decided to truly “gird my loins”, American fashion with some hi-tech, wicking, sports, boxer shorts. I feel like Rudolf Nureyev in blue spandex – actually there is spandex in them. If this is what your average young American stud is wearing, then no wonder so many are in therapy.

Boxers are supposed to be loose fitting, not like compression wear to stop me getting a DVT in me bits. Must have been designed by a women, no escape for or place to drain the snake, probably spoil the lines, nothing worse than seeing a “boxer line” under my fashion shorts. Perhaps the wicking’s meant to wick away urine, so no need for an escape hatch for the one eyed bed python – I don’t think I’ll be trying that theory.

Thank the FSM that I’m not in Blackburn. I imagine it must be impossible to sleep with the caterwauling, cacophony, screaming and wailing coming from the minarets around the town as the so called “moderate Muslims” protest at these atrocities done in the name of their so called religion.

Islamist militants have ordered all women and girls in the Iraqi city of Mosul to undergo female genital mutilation as they impose their brutal interpretation of Sharia, the United Nations said yesterday.

Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the al-Qaeda splinter group Islamic State of Iraq and al-Sham (Isis), was said to have issued a fatwa as “a gift to the people” ordering all females aged 11 to 46 to submit to forced circumcision.

ISIS, a bunch of 7th century Islamic fundamentalist rag heads, have announced an Islamic state, or caliphate, across territory it controls in Iraq and Syria, with al-Baghdadi declared the leader of all Muslims. Iraq and Syria today, tomorrow the world.

Two weeks ago a young man was crucified after being caught eating during Ramadan. Christians were ordered to convert to Islam, pay a special tax or leave the city. Isis warned that there would be “nothing for them but the sword”, if they refused.

Wake up, have a swig of your favourite tipple before it’s too late and we’re all dhimmis, with our women gliding around like orgasm free, zombie daleks, in black bin liners with no peripheral vision and half there genitals missing, and the men licking the floor 5 times a day, wearing lice infested beards, at least those who haven’t been crucified.

I was delivering a lecture on Philosophy at the University.

“By the year 2100, religion will disappear from the civilised world,” I said to the students.

A Muslim bloke stood up.

“But professor, currently Islam is spreading and will increase even more by then,” he said.

“Abdul,” I said, “I was talking about the civilised world.”

Saturday – hot and sunny.

Colourful bird pinching our food. Alas it has no name tag so we’re struggling to identify it. Could it be yet another new species.

Yet another gruelling hot day on the mountain volunteering. Wendy’s still feeling crook so she stays at home. In the afternoon she goes to see the local sawbones as it’s getting worse. It seems the antibiotics may well have cured the original UTI but the side effects are worse.

Interesting that the modern thinking seems to be to have shorter course of antibiotics. 3 days rather than 7. Cut them short before side affects kick in. Even argue that going the whole 7 days increases resistance. A complete turnaround to what we’ve always been told.

I can’t believe how important sunglasses are up here. 6,500 feet up, clear mountain air, the sun is so bright. But that’s totally eclipsed by the brightness of American teeth and the American smile. What is it with this obsession with dulux brilliant white teeth emitting 8,000 lumens of radiant energy and searing the eyeballs of anyone without sunglasses on. To top it all they seem to have their lips surgically held back to ensure the maximum exposure of teeth, even when not smiling. It’s almost like some right of passage like genital mutilation in the muslim world.

Then you get the youngsters, complete with braces, on their teeth that is, to achieve this perfection. In preparation for this dental perfection it seems that instead of braces being discrete, lets make them bright and colourful. Lets start dazzling people at an early age.

Of course us Brits are considered to have manky teeth, a by product of antediluvian dental industry and our just deserts for tolerating such a communist plot as our National Health Service.

Wow. Just seen 3 golfers walking. Have I been teleported to a different country. How un-American. Good job Mcarthy’s no longer around.

Solitude resort.

More lunacy from the crackpots in the EU:

Cancer researchers have warned that EU plans for a sweeping new privacy law could make future breakthroughs against the disease impossible.

Doctors, cancer charities, patients and MPs united yesterday in pressing Brussels to rethink its proposals, which threaten to strangle new drugs and discoveries with red tape, according to oncologists across Europe.

Esmo, the body that represents European cancer doctors, said the plans to force researchers to seek permission every time they wanted to use patient data would frustrate doctors and cancer sufferers alike.

This not only makes my blood boil but the marrow in my bones melt. It’s bad enough we suffer the daily crap from the EU. About time we had our own 1776 moment, with a modern day Jefferson & Adams rising to the occasion. Defeating this taxation without representation from the self serving bureaucrats of the EU, a life form even lower than your average politician.

Just consider if the Western governments decided to put their shoulder to the wheel and invest they could cure this awful disease. We need a modern day Kennedy to commit to this task, just as back in the 60’s they had the foresight and lofty aspirations to get to the moon.

Ah but we can’t afford it goes the cry? Well there’s a foreign aid budget that’s wasted on 3rd World countries that despise our democracies and seek our overthrow; that have space and weapons programmes; that support terrorism and piracy; that are corrupt and line the pockets of their rulers.

Let’s put ALL of that money to good use and beat this terrible disease.

Asda has made all of its Muslim employees redundant as their religion prevents them from selling alcohol or pork products.

“We would have loved to have transferred them to roles that would be acceptable to their religious beliefs” said a spokesman, “but unfortunately we don’t have a guns and explosives section.”

I’m not sure who invented the halal meat-slicer but I bet Abu Hamza had a hand in it!

I’m all for sport on TV, such as the Commonwealth Games, even though I don’t watch it. But can someone at the BBC, whose wages I pay, please explain to me why it is necessary to have it on BBC1 and BBC3 at prime viewing time. It seems like the stupidity of their IT department is spreading like a deadly ebola contagion throughout the BBC.

You know I think if they left BBC1 programming alone, just put the sport on BBC3, even the sports fans would be able to figure out where it was.

If Muslims stopped killing other Muslims because they belong to a different sect; stopped forcing their chosen practices on other Muslims; tolerated less pious Muslims; did not feel enraged if other Muslims did not abstain from alcohol or pork, or did not attend the mosque; did not kill men, women and children because they adhered to other faiths; did not blame rape on the length of a woman’s skirt; did not murder their own wives because they spoke to strangers, or their daughters because they flirted with boys or because they were raped by rascals; did not wish to start the World War III because some maverick cartoonist drew blasphemous caricatures; did not issue death fatwas because an author wrote a blasphemous book; or did not aim to spread their religion to the entire world, by the sword if necessary, then they could be tolerated in a civilised society.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

20140713 – Cultural overdose; 1812 Overture; Mountain Bike clinics; Mirror Lake in the Unita’s

Posted on July 20, 2014 by admin

Sunday – very hot and sunny.

Park City from Lost Prospector trail on Masonic Hill. Found the trail at last.

Up early to get up to Deer valley for the free guided tour. Sadly our free bus service expert, she shall remain nameless, screwed up on the timetable and didn’t notice the Deer valley service didn’t start until 10:00.

Never mind in typical experienced mother fashion she managed to misdirect and pacify a disappointed child by offer me an alternative. I just love the way Mothers do that with kids, divert them with a slight of hand. Always seems a little deceitful to me, but hey ho it works. Rather than my approach of dealing directly with confrontation and the resulting tantrums.

Anyway we finally get to find the Lost Prospector trail on Masonic hill. We’ve tried snowshoeing it in winter but could never find it. Probably because it’s covered in snow. A very pleasant walk with stunning view over Park City.

Visited Deer valley to book concerts, MTB course and have lunch and coffee. Place is more deserted than a Christian revivalist meeting in the

Deer Valley ponds and mountains from the cafe deck.

middle of Tehran. But in true American / Ford principle there’s a cast of 8 people sat around doing nothing and to add insult to customer service concert tickets have to be purchased upstairs.

Booked for the 1812 and the Disney concert.

Sat in sumptuous settees, sorry sofas, having coffee with great mountain views and watch the Stand up paddle boarders. Seems very popular, but I fail to comprehend why. Looks more boring than cricket or even watching footballers bite chunks out of one another in the World Cup. Need to try it I suppose.

Don’t you just love scroty behaviour, if it’s not yobo’s with feet on bus seats, it’s Dads with there feet on cafe tables – probably a footballer setting a great example to his kids. Better not say anything, he may bite or shoot me.

All the fun of the fair and FREE.

I see our local rag has picked up on yet more nonsense from the religion of peace, harmony, understanding and common sense. TV programme Dispatches reports on Muslims trying to take over our schools with teaching assistants talking in the staff room at the Olive School, Blackburn. Saying clapping and whistling are un-Islamic and ‘Satanic’; music in school should be banned as non-Muslim; the wearing of ties is forbidden in Islam as they could turn into serpents on the ‘Day of Judgement’; Gay people should be ‘stoned to death’. I can certainly relate to the “music and even dancing” issue as a chair of governor we had several attempts to ban these activities. What planet do these people live on. What amazes me is the brass balls to expect us to change to suit their barbaric ways. Simple. If you don’t like it go somewhere where these things are banned, there are plenty of barbaric places in the world that will accommodate your 7th century views.

Am I surprised? No. What really beggars belief is that we tolerate this 7th century barbaric nonsense in our schools and society.

Since the programme OFSTED did an unannounced inspection. Surprise, surprise they saw clapping and singing. Am I surprised? If the head of the school didn’t realise, after that programme, that there would be a snap inspection, then he should have been shipped out on the first plane to Taliban land. No doubt the kids were all lined up singing a song of welcome to the OFSTED inspectors, clapping them in and of course all wearing ties. Are OFSTED really taken in that easily.

It’s simple let’s get religion out of schools. They should all be secular. While we’re at it let’s get government meddling out of schools.

Angela squeals down the Alpine slide.

They’re not a political points scoring football or a test bed for the latest fad. Let’s have an independent organisation with clearly defined objectives, like the Bank of England, to stop this constant change in schools.

Lazy afternoon.

Monday – very hot and sunny again.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154397938605249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1&theater

After all that exertion I have a lazy afternoon to recover. Meanwhile Wendy’s had a day in doing houseworky type things. It’s too hot in the afternoon to even sit out on the deck. We were going to go to the free chamber music concert in the park but back out. Wendy’s not too keen and it’s so hot. Perhaps next Monday evening.

Wow it’s that hot in the evening that we watch TV out on the deck.

Why do we need blasphemy laws? Surely a supreme being / god is capable of defending his or her own honour.

Tuesday – very hot and sunny again.

Angela shows me up with climbing skills and lack of fear.

You’d think that yesterday being a 2,200 foot ride downhill it would be easy. Wrong! Exhausting and 85F didn’t help. Feeling the pain / gain this morning with muscles that haven’t seen action since the day I was born.

For the first time in ages we get the chance to have a lie in. Off up the to the mountain with Carol and Angela with some free ride tickets. Manage the Alpine slide; Alpine coaster; crazy golf can be a tad tortuous with a 5 year old; Angela loves the big slide and climbing wall, especially coming down. Then Wendy and I do the zip rider for good measure. A great day out and all free. By 16:00 we get home and its 90F out there.

Still living the dream. Every day is just epic. Great weather and so many things to do. Just no time to even sit around and read.

Watched Captain Philips DVD – just £0.72 a night from Red box, isn’t that just awesome.

Now I’m assuming for one moment that this film is reasonably accurate and has some degree of authenticity. I therefore find it incredulous

The latest is airline seat proposals from Airbus. Even cattle and sheep get more space in transit by law!

that here in the land of the sacred 2nd amendment; the NRA and all it’s propaganda; kids being slaughtered; proposals for armed teachers; little old ladies wandering around with with an AR15’s in their handbags, their right to protect themselves. Yet a massive American container ship on the high seas, in known piracy waters, and the only protection they have is water pistols (hoses). Not a gun, rocket launcher, missile or any sensible form of protection to be seen. A situation where even a half brained spaniel would see the merit in “bearing arms”. Goldfish for jam jars.

So a bunch of 3rd world rag heads, in a ram shackled boat that is on it’s last legs, take over a giant American container ship.

Putting that lunacy aside it’s a great film.

Wednesday – very hot and sunny again.

A typical living the dream sort of day. Up and out for a walk first thing. Back home for coffee. A bike ride into town. After lunch it’s a 5 minute stroll round to the PC MARC gym for a 1 hour yoga session. Then of course it’s time for afternoon tea. In the evening we catch the bus to the FREE – love that word – concert at Deer Valley. Perfect end to a perfect day.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154407370970249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1&theater

Thursday – very hot and sunny again.

Wendy on picnic at Deer Valley concert, complete with coke bottle and a potent slug of Bacardi already in it.

Wendy’s doing her Florence Nightingale stint.

I’m off on a mountain bike ride around Round Valley. Then it’s a coffee and breather stop in the hospital restaurant, followed by another ride. On tarmac this time. Finally down to the NAC for my archery volunteers duty. It’s all a bit shambolic. Most of the kids are not physically disabled but just have mental health issues (is that a PC correct term – who knows these days). Tuition seems to be minimal, just let them shoot arrows and enjoy.

Yoga class at local gym with soothing mountain views.

I spot one youngster who’s not even loading his arrows correctly. Most are flying off in all directions. Help put him right. Their targets are pretty shot up and yet the backside of their targets are still ok. Suggest they get some paint to paint and use the back of the targets.

Next week I’m promoted to instructor.

Now I know it’s a thing in the American psyche that they all seem to think the current president is a total numbskull, no matter what their political allegiance and even if they voted for him. Usually you’re made aware of this within the average ski lift ride of meeting them for the first time – 10 minutes. Today however sets an all time record.

I’m That hungry I’ll eat anything, even these crisps.

Stranger lady “Where about’s are you from?”.

Me “England”.

Strange lady “Oh the problem with you English is you all think Obamas marvellous, YET HE’S RUINING THIS COUNTRY”.

An all time record just 10 seconds. Just the second sentence. She’s never met me before and a rip roaring tourette tirade about that nasty Mr Obama proceeds. I decide not to stoke the raging torrent by mentioning how pleased I am to see Obama care, how good I thought his State of the Union address was (if he only delivers 25% it’ll be marvellous) and how good our National Health service is.

Now at risk of loosing any chance of a green card; of the NSA passing my details onto the NRA; deportation; the NRA getting a petition up for my deportation I have included some Piers Morgan Youtubes.

The first is Piers Morgan Debate with Alex Jones on Gun Laws, 2nd Amendment and his petition for the deportation of Piers Morgan.

If ever there was an argument for a total gun ban, it’s allowing people like this fruitcake to have a water pistol never mind a gun – he has 55. Utter claptrap. Non stop tangential random drivel. Oh and just for good measure he also believes the Bush administration was in a conspiracy behind 9/11.

Alex Jones then goes on his radio programme – yes he has a popular radio chat show (really worrying) – to claim he was to be KILLED after the interview.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?annotation_id=annotation_480902&feature=iv&src_vid=RC4JJWUtzkc&v=m-hLo9wVCiU

Piers Morgan’s goodbye video. Yes the NRA finally get shut of him.

As the 2nd’s so sacrosanct to the “American Psyche” I’ve come up with some possible solutions:

1st – scratch / rub out the letter “e” in the original document and change “bear arms” to “bare arms”.

God bless the 2nd. I keep tooled up with this little gem in my purse to protect me from rapists and muggers

2nd – a 28th Amendment prohibition of sale of ammunition to the public. Simples. Gun owners could have strict access to ammunition at a regulated firing range and could continue to oil and polish their guns each week. They could continue with their concealed weapons permits and in the event of an attack throw their gun at the attacker.

Mirror Lake in the Unitas.

3rd – just add 5 words to the 2nd amendment as suggested by John Paul Stevens – served as an associate justice of the Supreme Court from 1975 to 2010. “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms when serving in the Militia shall not be infringed.”

My question to supporters of the 2nd is this “Is the freedom under the 2nd amendment worth the death of you or one of your children?”.

Friday – very hot and sunny again.

Yet another cracking day living the dream. Up early and out at 10 with Carol, Hal, Marie (Carols sister) and Eric, and of course Angela. I’m driving Hals off the road Toyota beast, may come in hand for the Unita’s. Carol, Marie and Eric are in the car with little miss chatter box.

Drive to Mirror Lake for a picnic and leisurely stroll around the lake.

Great day out. Good food and company. Awesome scenery.

Then we’re back in and have a 20 minute quick change act as we get ready to go to the Deer Valley open air concert. Never a dull moment.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154413738045249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1

Ever wonder whats in store for us from the bearded ones and the so called religion of peace? Well wake up and smell the coffee, this is where we’re headed if we don’t start to get a grip of the multicultural PC lunacy that pervades our country. People need to stand up and speak out.

A woman accused of adultery was stoned to death in first the “execution” of its kind by the Islamic State, human rights campaigners said

Cannons ready for 1812.

yesterday.

The Islamic State running Mosul had already demanded that those Christians still in the city convert, pay a special tax or leave but messages blaring on mosques’ loudspeakers appeared to spark an exodus. An earlier statement by Mosul’s new rulers had said there would be “nothing for them but the sword” if Christians did not abide by those conditions before noon today.

Mirror Lake in the Unitas.

Thankfully we’re not in Blackburn, as I imagine the cacophony from the minarets as the so called “peaceful / moderate” muslims are shouting out in disgust and anger at this will be ear shattering.

The independent inquiry into the Trojan Horse take over of Birmingham schools came up with 21 recommendations for the council, it added: “It has been exacerbated by a culture of not wanting to address difficult issues and problems with school governance where there is a risk that BCC [Birmingham council] may be accused of being racist or Islamophobic.”

These are not difficult issues. It is simple. This is England. We are a tolerant society and respect different religions. But if you live here you do things our way, according to laws and norms of our country. Bugger so called islamaphobia and accusations of racism from the religion of permanent offence. Multiculturalism has failed. Stop bending over backwards to become such dhimmis. Give an inch to this so called religion of peace and they’ll have sharia law before you can say “peace be upon you”.

Saturday – very hot and sunny again.

I’m hungry. Gimee.

Another Saturday rolls around. Another day smiling and being helpful on the mountain. I’m truly worried that all this being nice to people may seriously affect my long term psyche and ruin any chance I have of the Victor Meldrew award. Certainly won’t enhance my image or my rants and raves. Although I have to be honest there are the times when you really feel like letting rip, as some of these people seem to have fallen out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. You seriously worry about pollution of the gene pool. It’s just an exercise in being professional. Think of the ski pass. Today was a good day no real howlers.

One thing I did notice yesterday, much to my surprise. Here we are in the land of guns and bubble gum. Yet, there’s hardly any gum on the plaza floor. Unlike Blackburn where you need crampons and climbing gear to surmount the mountains of chewing gum. Well done America.

Another lake in the Unitas.

Now here’s another surprise. After many years as a chair of governor in a CofE school, with predominantly muslim children, I can relate to this as our dhimmi PC multicultural CofE fell over themselves to give the religion of peace, harmony, understanding and tolerance an inch – “If the camel once gets his nose in the tent, his body will soon follow.” – and before you could say “praise be to allah” they’ll have stonings in the school playground.

A report into the ‘Trojan Horse’ plot by radical Muslims to infiltrate schools in Birmingham has found hardline governors bullied head teachers out of schools and imposed their own agenda.

The report commissioned by Birmingham City Council was highly critical of the council, which it said not only ignored the problem but made it worse by helping to remove besieged heads rather than support them.

Here we go again more lunacy from Europe, sadly they don’t have the brains of a biology specimen. Keep piling it on, it will just help make the results of the in / out vote so much more certain.

Excessively fat staff may have to be provided with larger office seats, lifts and priority parking by their employer after a European ruling yesterday that they have a disability that must be accommodated in the workplace. No doubt this will weigh heavily on the minds of employers as the morbidly obese employees (AKA Blobbies) will now be classified as disabled and have protection under the Equality Act 2010, so that their bosses cannot treat them less favourably because of their weight. Reasonable adjustments would have to be made to the workplace to accommodate such employees.

Hey what a great idea, encourage obesity. Give them all a disabled sticker and free sticky buns on the NHS. Stop them having to walk too far and stand any chance of exercise. I can’t wait to see a 25 stone air stewardess flub-erring down the isles, with her excess adipose tissue oozing from row to row and knocking your drinks over. Does this also mean that airlines will have to allocate them 2, 3 or even 4 seats at no extra cost?

Just love this:

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=432080923540666&set=vb.100002162852193&type=2&theater

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged 1812 Overture, Deer Valley, Free concert, hike, mirror lake, Mountain bike, Mountain bike clinic, Park City, Swagger, Unitas | Leave a comment

20140706 – One more off the bucket list; Summer is as good as winter; Living the dream.

Posted on July 14, 2014 by admin

Sunday – hot (86F) and sunny.

I hope this string doesn’t snap.

I’m on duty as a mountain host for the day. Smile stapled into place and ready for the onslaught of inane questions. Wendy’s off to the Outlet stores shopping. It’s what women do best. Too hot. Our home has no air conditioning just big patio doors to open downstairs and upstairs and ceiling fans. It’s even too hot to sit out on the deck and no way do we fancy a jacuzzi in this weather. Day on the mountain goes pretty quick. With a very relaxed team of hosts. Everyone just gets on with the job.

An overwhelming majority of the public now believes that people must speak English to be considered “truly British”, a national survey has found. 95 per cent now believe that speaking English is essential to being a member of the United Kingdom, compared with 86 per cent a decade ago. Seems like common sense to me, but our loony liberal PC storm troopers aren’t too keen on common sense. Heaven forbid immigrants should have to learn English. It always amazed me how many even 2nd or 3rd generation immigrants families never spoke English in the home and expected schools to provide extra resource to teach them. Pots for rags.

If I wake up in a morning and my elbows aren’t touching wood (meaning coffin)… it’s a good day!

George Carlin on Religion, great comedian just love his rants. Well worth watching. Hilarious:

Monday – hot and sunny again.

Up and out for 09:00 as we hike up Crescent Mountain Grade. Must have crossed nearly every ski run on the mountain. Wendy’s a whinging, weary, wilted, walker by the end of it. 86F out there even though we were up and out so early. Well done Wendy you made despite all the protestations.

Being as poor as squirrels with no nuts, we have no car – so un-American. I’m sat in the shade while Wendy does a weekly shop, then we have to haul it all back home on foot and on the bus.

Wendy tackles Crescent Mountain Grade (CMG).

Reminds us of how life used to be when we were kids with no cars, just them things on the end of our legs and a bus. Not even a bike. Crotch droppings these days, and I include my kids in this, just haven’t a clue. We remember frost on the windows in the mornings, that was even on the inside of the single glazed windows; no fire lit, so freezing cold until someone lit one; hardly any milk, so tea on me cornflakes; sugar buttes, and if you were really wealthy bread and jam to fill up with; outside toilet; tin bath on Friday night and kids were last in the cold murky waters. No skiing holidays, no cruises, no summer holidays. If you were really lucky you got a day out on the train to Skeggy as my Dad worked on the railways so we got a free ticket. No colour TV, no 3D TV. Just no TV. But worst of all no computers or Internet. We’ve never had it so good.

Need a proper beer, so that rules out any of these American pinkel waters. 2 Pilsner Urquell sat in the fridge just begging to be opened. Only 48 minutes and 12 seconds before they’ll be sliding down the side of a beer barrel, not a posy flower vase.

But hang on how can you have an Oktoberfest in with no beer? Ask the Mormons they seem to know how. Isn’t his a blatant infringement of the 1st Amendment – Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion….”.

My winter office. Closed in the summer.

Religion strikes again.

Tuesday – very hot and sunny again.

Up at the crack o sparrows to avoid the heat. Mind you some technogeek, he shall remain nameless, set the 06:00 alarm.

Things are looking up, even managed Cammy’s trail without needing shoe leather. Then spent 30 minutes discussing US politics with Dick, a staunch Obama supporter, here in the midst of this extreme right wing Republican Utah. Mind you Park City is a little ungodly, enclave of Democrats – a real Sodom and Gomorrah.

Where’s the snow?

Worth an early start, not too hot.

Park City makes it even easier with more alcoholic beverage businesses per capita than any other place in the state. So whether you’re looking for a local brew or just a glass of wine, you won’t be left high and dry.

What a veritable cornucopia of birds on our deck, mind you they do eat more bird food a day than we can afford. Sadly these two geriatrics forgot their binoculars so we don’t get to identify them all.

Isn’t nature awesome> Just look at the beauty and symmetry.

Wendy and I cycle down – the key word there being down – to Kimball junction for a spot of shopping. But first a Starbucks moment to help me gird me loins and a psychoactive stimulant to ease the pain.

Finally decide to lash out and buy some Camelbaks for our walks, mountain biking. There big on “hydration packs” over here nearly as obsessive as “Gluten free”.

I see that the religion of permanent offence has been at it again because of another film / cartoon. Like most of these efforts they’re certainly not Oscar material but in the interest of improving the threshold of tolerance of this pernicious religion I’ve posted details of where it can be viewed.

Aisha and Muhammad

The Dramatic Life of a Little Child Married to the Prophet of Islam

As announced in an earlier press release, the movie, “Aisha and Muhammad”, has been released on schedule.

The release has been coincided with the US Independence Day on July 4 as a mark of respect to the American victims in the battle against Radical Islam.

The full movie in English can be viewed online from the following website links:

http://www.islam-watch.org/video.html

Sometimes I pretend to be

NORMAL

But it gets boring……

So I go back to being me.

Wednesday – hot and sunny then at teatime we get a downpour.

I’m up and out for 09:00. Well made it up Town lift side, Sweeneys switchbacks and Johns trail. Feel like a drowned water rat by the time I get to the top of Payday lift. It’s so humid you could beat the water out of the air with a boat paddle. I think I’ve lost 8 pints of sweat. Thankfully my new Camelbak helps is pretty good. Good job Wendy didn’t come, the earache would have been too painful. At several points it was just an uphill scramble – think I may have been lost.

A well deserved swig of water at the top of Crescent Mine Grade. A tad too hot for Wendy.

Can now advise guests on Townlift hikes. “Don’t bother. If you must do it, go down.”

After lunch get myself a locals $70 point ticket for the PC MARC gym or any classes. 10 points, so just $7 per class or gym access. Go to a Yoga class. Can’t believe I survive an hours yoga and not a drop of sweat on my brow. Now that means I’m either getting fitter – mind you I am at my lowest weight today in living memory, not that impressive when you consider I can’t remember what I had for breakfast – or after this mornings hike there’s just no sweat left in me.

Then the heavens open up. Raining like a cow peeing on a flat rock and then hailstones. In typical American fashion even the raindrops are bigger and better. Wendy’s gone shopping but miraculously she misses a drenching. This is the first serious rain we’ve seen since we got here. Please tell me this doesn’t mean we’ll be seeing a perambulating, inverted, black bin liner next. Mind you the thought of one hiking, mountain biking, snowboarding or better still skiing does stretch the imagination.

I get perplexed that so many people get upset and rile against another mosque being built, or an old pub being converted into an islamic community centre. I think, in true PC multicultural loony liberal fashion, the mosque or community centre should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance. That is why I also propose that two nightclubs be opened next door to the mosque, thereby promoting tolerance from within the mosque. We could call one of the clubs, which would be gay, “The Turban Cowboy,” and the other a topless bar called “You Mecca Me Hot.” Next door should be a butcher shop that specializes in pork, and adjacent to that an open-pit barbecue pork restaurant, called “Iraq of Ribs.” Across the street there could be a lingerie store called ” Victoria Keeps Nothing Secret,” with sexy mannequins in the window modeling the goods. Next door to the lingerie shop there would be room for an adult sex toy shop, “Koranal Knowledge,” its name in flashing neon lights, and on the other side a liquor store called “Morehammered.” All of this would encourage Muslims to demonstrate the tolerance they demand of us, so their mosque issue would not be a problem for others.

Yes, we should promote tolerance, and if you are not laughing or smiling at this point… It is either past your bedtime, or it’s midnight at the oasis and time to put your camel to bed!!!!

What is it with this American obsession with everything being gluten free. It’s every where and everything. I’ve written to the local water board, various wine growers and brewers asking them to confirm their products are gluten free. Now I worry whether my petrol should also be gluten free, will it harm my engine.

A cynic – not me of course – make think it’s just a marketing ploy to exploit and rip off the gullable, thick, health freaky obsessives. Are you surprised that gluten free is always considerably more expensive.

But the facts prove it’s just another rip off fad, with a NORMAL loaf of bread costing £1, while gluten free costs £3.

Bear in mind that less than 1% of the population are coeliac. While many are convinced that – coeliac or not – avoiding gluten will make them healthier, a study published last year in the Journal of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics disagrees. It concluded: “There is no evidence to suggest following a gluten-free diet has any significant benefits in the general population.” “Indeed,” it continued, “there is some evidence to suggest that a gluten-free diet may adversely affect gut health in those without coeliac disease or gluten sensitivity.” Other research has indicated that gluten-free diets are often low in fibre and can be linked to deficiencies in B vitamins, iron and folate. Inevitably, in the US, a gluten-free backlash is already under way. “Coeliac: the Trendy Disease for Rich, White People”, is a typical recent headline in the popular blog, Science 2.0.

Unfortunately, the gluten-free community has even less tolerance for jokes than for pasta. Thankfully I can continue to eat macaroni pudding with impunity and at minimal cost, thats if I can persuade her indoors to cook it.

People often wonder why I’m keen on baked beans followed by macaroni pudding. Well when I was at “bilateral” school – best not to ask. I always went to my Grandmas for lunch – well not being posh we called it dinner. Every day she’d serve me baked beans, with a nob of butter of course, cooked until dry (anything less than 15 minutes and they’re raw). Followed by a macaroni pudding, also cooked to perfection – until dry and curling at the edges. Every day for four years. Then one day I asked “Grandma, do you think we could have a change of menu”? That was it, never got me baked beans or macaroni pudding ever again. What a deprived, or was it depraved, childhood.

Thursday – warm and downpour late afternoon.

Hmm… lets see this cakes for two. So why do we have a 35% fatty rate?

Lazy morning for me. Wendy’s off to be Florence Nightingale. Lunch time I go for a MTB ride and then call in at the hospital for a complimentary coffee and read of the paper in their comfortable lounge area. Good to people watch all the Florences in their lime green blouses scurrying around and spending most of their time chattering away like Mocking birds on LSD.
[facebook_embedded_post href=”{https://www.facebook.com/tony.w.edwards/posts/10154378014960249}”]

Then in the afternoon I’m doing training for my Robin Hood archery (a Nottingham lad) stint at the National Ability Center. Amazing place for the disabled and when you see what they achieve it’s quite right they use the word “ability”.

Bike home and get caught in a real downpour. Fortunately it’s very warm so it doesn’t really matter. Quite a change as I can’t remember the last time I got really soaked right through.

In the evening we’re off out to dinner at Tricy and Rivers (possible home exchangers). They live up in Deer (aptly named) valley. They have an awesome 5,000 square foot home. Only the FSM can guess at what or why you need 5,000 square feet. Good meal, good company, good conversation and good beer. They have 4 other guests for dinner so it’s lively conversation all round. One of the guys brews his own beer and brings a load of samples. They’re very good, not a bit like the home brews I last tasted. Have a very interesting conversation with him and get to sample an excellent Kolsch and a Pilsner, none of your typical American pinkle water.

National Ability Center archery range.

Only in America.

Close by parking spaces at the gym for fuel efficient vehicles. I’ll define fuel efficient – LPG, electric or over 30 MPG (well it is America).

Friday – cloudy with rain thunder and lightning in the afternoon.

Angela does archery. Just look at that perfect release.

I’m on mountain host duty and Wendy’s at the hospital. Another easy day with the Friday crew.

In the afternoon the heavens open up and some thunder and lightning, every things shut down while it passes. We get to leave early.

Then it’s off out to dinner yet again. This time with Rick and Lynda, potential home exchangers. They have a lovely home up on Park Meadows. Just love the way American homes tend to be so open plan with kitchen, dinning and lounge all one big contiguous open area. Great evening, awesome food, wine and best of all company. Never ceases to amaze me how friendly and how much home exchangers have in common.

Just test driving a bike for the disabled. Hard work. Managed to crash it when a car tried to reverse into me.

Please tell me the World hasn’t gone mad:

Liverpool confirm Luis Suárez’s £75m move to Barcelona pending medical. Who’s Luis Suarez? He’s a footballer who bit one of his opponents in the World cup. Not only that it’s the 3rd time he’s done it. Barbaric. What did FIFA do about it? A slap on the wrist and a few months ban. Why wasn’t he prosecuted for GBH or assault? These guys are role models for kids. Hey kids if someone upsets you, bite them. Over paid morons. Why wasn’t he banned for life. Instead he’s being transferred and will no doubt receive a big chunk of money. Sounds like some sort of experiment in creative stupidity. But it’s football, what can you expect?

Saturday – very hot and sunny.

Bump into a lady at the bus stop.

Tony: “That’s a nice dog. What make is it?”

Lady: “Oh it’s a spaniel / poodle cross.”

Tony: “We had a spaniel but it only had half a brain. Does he have a full brain?”

Lady: “I don’t know we adopted it!”

Owner obviously is the one with a half of a brain.

On duty as mountain hosts yet again. So hot just try to avoid the sun all day.

Then we’re off to the hospital staff party. Free food and entertainment at the National ability centre for all hospital staff, volunteers and their families.

They’ve a climbing wall, ropes course, archery and disabled bikes – well you know what I mean – for you to try.

I’m totally freaked out by heights.

[facebook_embedded_post href=”{https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154392504790249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1}”]

Don’t you just love the American obsession with food. They walk up with a giant burger, just drooling fat, calories and cholesterol, and are then distraught when they can’t get 52 ounce diet coke. Oh well have to make do with a normal coke. How can anyone drink 52 ounces of sugar or even saccharin?

[facebook_embedded_post href=”{https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10154393600455249&set=a.10152397913775249.954731.621375248&type=1}”]

That’s better. Just 3 feet to go!

What a great opportunity to try all these facilities. Will I try the climbs again now it’s off my bucket list? Who knows. I will still be petrified but I suppose familiarity will help overcome this fear.

Let’s not forget however that all these facilities at the NAC are in the main for the disabled. Yes, they get people with disabilities up to these heights and even have a shaky wooden bridge over 50 feet up that you can go across in a wheelchair. Can you imagine the sense of achievement these kids, and adults, must feel.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged blasphemy, bucket list, climbing wall, hiking, home exchange, home swap, House swap, National Ability Centre, Park City, religious nonsense, Religous fruitcakes, rope course, snowhut, Travel | Leave a comment

20140629 – Appointment with fear; July the Fourth Parade

Posted on July 7, 2014 by admin

Sunday – hot and sunny.

Need a rest after 10 minutes biking.

Lazy morning. Bike ride up to the Silly Market. Well for some of us it was a bike ride, others stopped and rested after 10 minutes. Coffee at the Bridge Cafe.

Carol, Hal and of course Angela came round for dinner. Out on the deck I might add.

Hostess / Meeters and Greeters – for some reason nearly all restaurants / cafes / diners have these hostess / meeter greeters, from here on in they will be called wasters (1)

You arrive. The place is virtually empty and over in the far corner, chatting to her mates about last nights sexual exploits, is the waster. Finally, when a long queue has developed, she saunters over at the speed of an arthritic snail and asks the two of you for “how many”.

If the place is 90% empty she summons a navigator (2), whose sole responsibility seems to be

Wot no snow. Ski runs from Mid Mountain trail.

getting you to your table without getting lost or the need for a GPS system. If the place is over 10% full then tough luck, she puts your name on a waiting list, tells you it’ll be about 30 minutes before a table is ready and she’ll call you or gives you a vibrator – not the sort you’re thinking of. Just a power trip. They tell you it’s so that you’re not kept waiting for a waiter to attend. That’s why, after you’ve sat down, it takes 20 minutes for the waiter – who’s an advance degree in eye contact avoidance – to notice you or even the white table cloth you’ve been waving above your head for the past 10 minutes.

Wendy on Mid Mountain.

The Navigator finally takes you over to the table and tells you the name of the waitress she was chatting to – who will of course be with you shortly. The navigator’s not allowed, intellectually capable or trained to give you a menu, take your drinks order or even pour out water.

The job creation scheme and Ford breakdown of tasks doesn’t stop there. It’s only just begun. You sit down and the water boy (3) comes around and poors you a glass of water. Can he bring you a menu or take a drinks order? Heaven forbid way beyond his pay / intellect grade.

Finally just as you’re ready to up stakes in disgust the waiter (4) deigns to grace you with her presence. Tells you her name and goes away to get menus. By now you’re as thirsty and dry as a dead dingo’s donger. But, no she’ll have to come back for your drinks order, keep it simple. Don’t

Wendy stops again. This time for a snack.

confuse her. Don’t upset the order of things.

Waiter finally comes back and takes your drinks order. Drinks takes so long you’re sure she’s pressing the grapes herself. Now she’s ready to take your order, whether you’re ready or not. Woe betide you if you’re not ready, that incurs a 20 minute wait penalty.

Eventually you get fed. At which point you notice you’re the only people in the restaurant with the physical dexterity to use both a knife and fork simultaneously.

Yellow bandana's around their dogs neck to warn people the dog is Grumpy and not to approach......for some reason I'm given one!

Waitress usually pops around when you’re on your last mouthful to see if everything is ok, at which point she starts to be nice to you in anticipation of the tip she’s expecting.

When you’ve finished and put your knife and fork together the manager / quality control guy (5) turns up. You can tell he’s a manager as he struts around complete with Brookes Brothers shirt, button down collar and tie, along with a name badge. “How’s the meal?”. When you tell him that you feel the chef either works for the local crematorium in his spare time; may be an eskimo used to freezing his food; or just lacks imagination, this causes him to go into a catatonic state and disappear in a puff of smoke. Confrontation’s way above his pay grade and you’re certainly not meant to raise constructive criticism.

Appointment with fear.

Finally the waitress has learned to smile, turns up with your bill and engages you in such inane pleasantries you have a dying urge to stick two fingers down the back of your throat and vomit over the tablecloth.

Just as you leave you realise there’s yet another involved. Yes , its the buzz boy (6) who tidies the table and wipes it with a 10 year old rag that just oozes salmonella. Usually the same cloth that he wiped the sweaty seats with.

Finally you get directed over to the cashier (7), the final player, in this pageant.

7 different people to serve you a meal. Heaven alone knows how many there must be in the kitchen. Surely they could manage without the Meeter and greeter, the navigator, the water boy, the buzz boy, the manager and the cashier. If they doubt it then I can take you to a pleasant, busy restaurant in Serfaus, Austria where just one waitress does the lot, with minimum fuss or delays.

Two Bi-planes fly past on Independence day.

Then of course there’s “maximize table utilisation” rules this is a real killer. You arrive the place is full of tables ready set for 4 or more. There all empty, but there are just two tables set for two and they are full. Heaven forbid she should waste a table for 4 on us two, no she puts you on a waiting list, about 30 minutes – followed by a few choice words from me and a swift exit.

In case you think I’ve been a tad sexist in the above – as I’m sure you’ll realise not at all like me – I have never encountered a male waster, they’re all female and usually the best piece of eye candy in the place.

4th July parade - Park City Mountain Resort float.

Best solution is to ignore them and plonk yourselves down at a table of your choosing. That cause real consternation.

Monday – hotter and sunny.

Took Crescent up to the top (free) and then walked Mid Mountain to Spiro and then down Spiro. Lovely walk nearly all downhill. Made it, even with all the rest stops that Wendy wanted. Actually took 2 hours 40 minutes. Pleasant downhill stroll. The thought of a Stiegl lager at the Silver Star cafe kept me motivated, sadly no longer available – standards are slipping.

Pleasant, but very expensive, lunch / coffee lounging in the Silver Star sofas.

Tuesday – hot and sunny.

4th July - Uncle Sam.

Lazy morning.

Wendy managed to break her filling, probably nattering too much.

Took a bike ride down to Kimble junction.

Well that was painless…..visit to the Dentist here in Park City. What an experience just turn up no appointment necessary ….sorted filling done.

In case you think this American job creation scheme is just reserved for restaurants and Henry Fords car plants. Think again. Wendy’s just been for a filling at the dentist here. This involved

4th July parade - National Ability Centre float.

nearly as many in a cast of a B grade blue movie. 1 Receptionist to greet us. 2 Man with clip board to get our details and of course a signature on an all American liability waiver. 3 Nurse / technician type guy who checked out tooth and told us the options. 4 An injectioner / number. 5 X Ray girl to take an X ray, immediately available. 6 Dental nurse to usher in the Dentist, no fanfare of trumpets sounded. 7 Then finally the dentist, sorry, “the doctor”. 8 Different receptionist prepared the all important bill, by which time the cost of treatment had fallen from $330 to $125, no complaint from me there. 8 people to do one filling. Tell me that’s no the Ford principle and job creation gone to extremes.

4th July parade - local fuzz with their noisy bikes. Need earplugs. Should be prosecuted for creating such a racquet.

European Court of Human Rights rule that Burka ban does not breach human rights. One small step for common sense. At last the European court gets something right. Now all we need is some politicians in the big natter house to grow some gonads and introduce a ban in the UK.

Wednesday – hot and sunny.

Try fitting my emergency bike pump. The plastic, yes bloody plastic, screw shears off in the bike thereby rendering it impossible to fit the pump and refit my water carrier.

Ride down to Walmart, expecting a battle about consequential loss due to their feeble screws. At one stage they’re thinking of giving me a new bike. But no the supervisors hands me over to one

4th July parade.

of their sub-contractors – they assemble barbecues and bikes for them – who has all the tools and proceeds to drill out the plastic and rethread the hole. A bit of a botch but all fixed and working. Impressed with their customer service and especially the unstinting help from Brendon.

Hard ride back home so at least I get a 12 mile ride in.

After lunch we’re looking after Angela for a few hours so we take her down to the Farmers market. Mind you she’d prefer to play on the iPad. It’s quite a pathetic market and hardly any farm produce apart from a few withered cherries. Angela spends most of her time on the giant slide and eating an Ice Cone – keeps her happy for ages.

Then can you believe it I break one of my teeth. It’s my turn for an appointment with fear. Is this some sort of conspiracy from PC dentists to drum up trade? Is it the altitude exploding my sea level fillings? Yesterday it was Wendy with a broken tooth, today it’s me. I’m expecting a bulk buying discount.

Opening of 4th July parade.

Same walk in service and multitude. Have my usual discussion about no needle. They’re somewhat put out by this and can’t believe it, but proceed without. No pain. Good job, sorted.

Apparently a black bear has been seen wandering around town. Excitement. I never can remember if you’re best playing dead if you see a black bear or is it with a grizzly. One of them eats carrion, the other prefers fresh meat, so get it wrong and playing dead is a sure fired way to end up real dead.

Apparently the fundamentalist extremists from the so called religion of peace are working on new plastic explosives that cannot be detected so more misery is being inflicted at airports.

Perhaps at last some vestige of common sense may now prevail and the authorities will profile. You know it makes sense. Just ignore the loony Politically correct brigade.

A good start would be a separate queue and search regime for all muslims or just ban them from flying. Perhaps then the so called middle of the road / good Muslims might start helping with the fight against these pernicious fanatics. Another alternative might be muslim only flights. A tad difficult to implement but we could also allow all the do gooder, loony PC crackpots on with them.

Thursday – hot, sun and cloud.

I’m on duty as a mountain host for the day. Expect it to be busy but turns out pretty slack. Wendy’s up at the hospital doing her Florence Nightingale

4th July parade.

stint.

Finally finish Dexter Season 4 – wow didn’t see that coming. Series gets better.

Just watched an awesome programme on the discovery of a particle travelling faster than speed of light. Defies all the theories of physics for the past 100 years. If it’s finally validated, that’ll throw the whole World of Physics into an electron spin. Amazing stuff.

Physics joke:

Barman says sorry we don’t serve neutrinos.
A neutrino walks into the bar.

Meanwhile a few people have told us the “Book of Mormon” musical is great and could win Oscar awards for “Best Blasphemy Show”. Sadly I do have an aversion to musicals. Will enquire if it’s on in salt lake 😎

4th July parade.

Actually I’m thinking of writing a musical. Can’t decide on the tittle. Choices so far are “Book of Islam”, “Mo does Christians”, “Peace, tolerance and understanding”, “The Hate Show” or “How I hate people of the book”. There’s more scope in this 7th century barbaric religion for a musical comedy, than there are muslims at a stoning. Perhaps we could get the Monty Python Team to do one last movie such as “Monty Python and Muslim Fairy Tales”. Islam needs desensitising and weaning off this blasphemy culture.

Friday – very hot and sunny.

Great day for the 4th July parade. We always enjoy them and PC has quite a big one, lasts over an hour.

Meet some potential home exchangers (Rick and Linda) up on Main Street for the parade.

4th July parade

They’ve got chairs already set up along with a cooler full of drinks and Mimosas (bucks fizz). Great parade with good company and their friends.

How come Americans are so friendly? Why don’t we have any parades like this? I can’t ever recall seeing parade anywhere near as good as this in the UK. What days do we really celebrate? The Americans just love a good parade, St Patricks day; Independence day; Pioneer day; Labour day; Thanksgiving day etc. Whatever happened to our society? I blame multi-culturism, we’ve lost the ability to be patriotic. Has anyone noticed how few Union Jacks (Union Flags for the purists) you see flying. In fact it’s almost got to the point where if you see a Union Jack or the Cross of St George flying you think they’re National front / right wing fanatics. Sad.

Have a wander down to the park where there’s live music, food and drinks. Everyone, families, having a great time.

Then stroll up to PCMR plaza to see what’s going on at the mountain. Not as busy as anticipated.

4th July parade.

I think it’s about time the UK had it’s declaration of independence from the EU. Pity we can’t bring back Adams and Jefferson from 1776 to help us escape this toxic bureaucracy.

Saturday – hot and sunny again.

We’re both on duty at PCMR as Mountain Hosts again. Stapled me smile in place. Tape recorder at the ready with “Hows it going?”, “Have a great day.”, “Do you need any help?”, “My accent! Its all the way from England.” and if things get really desperate “No I don’t know your friend who lives somewhere in England, believe it or not over the years we’ve been at it like rabbits over there and there’s over 50 million of us, not to mention the millions of foreign hangers on and scroungers.”.

It was 85F and that was in the shade. Us poor Hosts are out on the plaza wilting.

Seems like at least one muslim inman has some common sense:

4th July live music in the park, along with hot dogs, burgers, pulled pork and beer (well sort of).

Dr Hargey, from the Muslim Educational Centre of Oxford, said however that the British establishment had been hoodwinked by zealots who claimed that the burka was intrinsic to Islam. He writes: “There is no Koranic mandate for female facial masks; it is not culturally common for Pakistani women to conceal their faces; and no one, including women, has an unqualified right to dress as one pleases in public.”

He condemns the veil as an imported Saudi fad that should be rejected for religious, social, sexist, security and health reasons. “This Saudi-financed campaign is just another salvo in the battle for the hearts and minds of British Muslims. If Britain’s liberal and human rights industry fail to recognise this, we will all live to regret it.”

Yes our loony PC do gooders have been fooled and sold us down the caliphate path of islamic domination yet again.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Tony & Wendy's Travel Blog

20140824 – Last days; Homeward bound

20140817 – Flying Aces (don’t try this at home); Scuba in a hot tub; Busy, busy week.

20140811 – Stand Up Paddle Boring

20140804 – It’s All Go. Never A Dull Moment. Living The Dream.

20140731 – Me, upset the muslims? Never. Time for a few comments on the Mormons and the NRA.

20140728 – Leisurely week; Yeah it’s raining.

20140720 – Road trips; This Is The Place; Jupiter bowl; Heber Creeper

20140713 – Cultural overdose; 1812 Overture; Mountain Bike clinics; Mirror Lake in the Unita’s

20140706 – One more off the bucket list; Summer is as good as winter; Living the dream.

20140629 – Appointment with fear; July the Fourth Parade

Recent Posts

Archives