20131117 – Sanibel & Captiva Islands

Sunday – very hot, very sunny.

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Answer to who said it:

What is wrong with inciting intense dislike of a religion if the activities or teaching of that religion are so outrageous, irrational or abusive of human rights that they deserve to be intensely disliked.”

Rowan Atkinson

Where has all me disc space gone. 250 Gig DSC09926 own to 500 Megs, hardly enough left store me wet tee shirt pics. Whatever happened to those halcyon days when a 2 Meg Toshiba laptop was the dogs doodaahs. I wouldn’t mind all me data files fit into a 2 Gig Dropbox account. The rest is op sys, photos, “One Foot in the Grave”, rants and music. Spent another morning doing long overdue housekeeping. Me hero, Victor, has had all his series cast out to a backup disc – times is hard.

Fresh pineapple again for lunch. Luscious. Pity it’s lipids like me lips.

Blistering barnacles, what better way to spend a very hot, very sunny Sunday afternoon than to take to the high seas with Captain Pugwash and his deckhand Maggie Lafayette. Maggie was all for having Pugwash keel hauled because the sea was too bumpy and going too fast, all of 20 knots (note the nauticals). Was lovely out there, next time we need to take our lunch with us. The Captain survived the whole afternoon at sea without calling for Huey and Ruth, no diced carrots for the seagulls. Docking is a tricky task. DSC09911Only took 3 attempts.

Apparently UK electric blanket and fire manufacturers is a good sector to be in. Or less subtly put it’s due to get colder and snow. Apparently the UK’s due a 3 month cold snap. Considering they can’t forecast, they stand as much chance of getting it right as I would of selling bibles in the market in Tehran.

Oh and I forgot to mention its 84F here today, just having some air conditioned respite.

More PC and Non PC:

Its twelve inches long, but he doesn’t use it as a rule.

The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.

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Why is it that when a man talks dirty to a woman it’s sexual harassment, but when a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95/minute?

On their wedding day, what does a Polish man give to his wife that’s long and hard? His family name.

Rule of Thumb  (UK) — Originates from the old English dictum that a husband could not beat his wife or children with any stick wider than his thumb.

Ponder this:

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With increased Muslim demographics, the politics of Westminster could well be radically altered. A Muslim party or a Muslim-dominated Labour Party could eventually hold the balance of power, making it impossible to form a government without their support.

And the price of that support could well be official recognition of Islamic culture such as the call to prayer throughout the country, Muslim public holidays, sharia banking, fully operating sharia courts and major changes to foreign policy on Israel and the US. And my grandkids with beards and walking around with a black bin liner over their heads.

Yes, the religion of peace has no truck with democracy or human rights but it will gladly use our DSC03035 emocratic freedoms to their own ends to get control, introduce sharia and a new caliphate. Of course our loony dhimmi left wing liberal storm troopers and do gooders will be falling over themselves to bring about the downfall of our way of life.

Wake up before it’s too late and smell the stench of sharia and human rights atrocities perpetrated in the name of the religion of peace.

Monday – hot and sunny.

In the morning we drive down to have a stroll around old Marco village. Well it has a sign saying old Marco Village but that’s about all there is of it. Being America we didn’tt expect a 14th Century village complete with pond, stocks, DSC09938giblet and thatched cottages, but even the sign was circa 2000.

Mind you it didn’t have a decent ball and chain.

Then in the afternoon I take to the kayak. Manage to launch it without drowning. Explore the waterways and admire the multi-million $ homes and boats – most of them empty. Manage not to go tits up but circling vultures obviously thought there might be a good chance. Pleasant afternoon. Wendy passes on the opportunity, even though she has her life jacket. it’s a two seater and she would have been useful as some front ballast.

Just planning our travels for next year. We’ve got Park City for January to end of August. Will be coming home mid April to mid May, then 2 weeks in France before returning to spend all of summer in Park City.

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Looks like we need to be in the UK for a happy family event in September. Then we can try and escape again until Christmas.

We’ve just agreed a home exchange mid October to mid November in Albuquerque, really need to learn how to spell it, of Breaking Bad fame. Now looking for some places in Texas for mid November to mid December. Then I suppose it’s home for Christmas.

The more adventurous amongst you may advocate holidays in more exotic climbs, with no electricity; no running water; bed bugs, lizards and cock roaches for bed mates; with the flux (Trots) as a reward for being brave and trying a local delicacy. Nope. Not for us. Our basic criteria for holiday locations is civilisation. That means wifi and electricity; no need for your own set of needles, in case you go into hospital; no hint of sharia law or any chance of me being stoned for my comments, perfectly justified I might add, on that religion of peace. So it’s Florida and anywhere in North America for us. Boring? How can it DSC09952 e? They have wifi nearly everywhere, gourmet restaurants and cafes like Taco Bell and Starbucks, and booze in their supermarkets – apart from some of those loony blue law states that are infringing their first amendment.

When we’ve explored all the civilised places then we may start on more exotic locations. Or there again we may do them all over again.

Now I don’t know what’s happening with the British press. Perhaps it’s there new found fear of a Royal Charter but I’m amazed that a recent incident hasn’t made it to the mass media. Well never mind, I’m not afraid to report it. Sadly it concerns the EDL. Now let me be absolutely clear I am no fan of these morons. In the main they’re just a load of scrots looking for trouble and the muslim media machine must just love their antics, as it does the muslim cause more good than harm.

But this concerns a recent EDL march where a man was wearing a burka. Why not. He was trying DSC03041 o make a point for equality under the law. He was arrested under section 60 for refusing to remove the burka. If you refuse to be placed under surveillance at a political protest by wearing a head covering , such as a burka, in order to conceal your identity, you will be jailed. However, there is little evidence of this being applied if you are a Muslim protesting in a burk – the UK Govt allows you to wear a Burka. This in effect creates a two-tier system in the UK, where Muslims are given favorable rights and non-Muslims are harassed and jailed. This is what the EDL yob was complaining about. I admire him for his stance, we need more people standing up for equality under the law, but his way of going about it just made a mockery of his quite valid point. 

If he had any intelligence he would have researched the acts of oppression (yes there are plenty of them in the UK) before hand; calmly and with dignity asked the police officer for the boundaries of the authorised area; asked for the name of the senior police officer authorising and what was their grounds for a reasonable belief that violence has or is about to occur; then removed the burka. Perhaps then it would have been headline news.

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“Section 60 of the Criminal Justice and Public Order Act 1994 allows a police officer to stop and search a person without suspicion. Section 60 stops and searches can take place in an area which has been authorised by a senior police officer on the basis of their reasonable belief that violence has or is about to occur, and where it is expedient to prevent it or search people for a weapon if one was involved in the incident.

Yet another attack on our freedoms and a classic example of this countries dhimmi attitude.

Tuesday – very hot and very sunny despite forecast of clouds and 50% chance of rain.

Decide to drive up to Sanibel and Captiva Islands. They may only be 50 mile away but with all the traffic lights it takes two hours.

Sanibel’s a lovely old World charm Island. Not as commercialised and urbanised as Marco. A real DSC03051 each persons place. Some lovely beaches, full of shell seekers. Trip Advisors number one attraction is the public library – now that has to be a first and shows a complete lack of exploitation and tourist attractions. Oh forgot to mention it does have a shell museum, about as tempting as visiting a Taliban museum of science and evolution.

Not a traffic light to be seen. They seem to be doing their bit for global warming by having cops direct traffic. Yet another example, along with leaf blowing, advertising sign wavers and flag men, of American futile job creation schemes.

Visit the old lighthouse and beach. Wendy decides to be brave and have a paddle, without her life jacket I might add.

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Have lunch at an eclectic popular restaurant called the Island Cow. Typical excess portions of American grub, enough to feed a family of 15 for a week. But good food all the same and pretty reasonable.

Then visit the Island Nature reserve and take the nature drive. Wendy keeps in the car to avoid feeding the noseeums that apparently are out for her blood!

Drive over to Captiva Island. Even less developed. It’s main claim to fame being it has a Stop sign.

A long day, a lot of driving but enjoyed our Sanibel trip. Lovely Island, nearly as nice as Marco.

Beans on toast for tea, after that classic Rueben’s for lunch, both my favourites. After 43 years Wendy still serves them beans raw. How many more times before she realises they need a knob of butter and at least 15 minutes.

US drivers have an outright dread of pedestrians that never ceases to amaze and un-nerve me. When they’re in a car it’s like they fear some mystical vortex or force field around you; won’t come anywhere near you; give way, at a very discrete distance, like some sycophantic arse licking toady worshipping your very presence. Of course the inverse of all that is when they’re on the road they DSC03066 aunter across on their mobile phones, chatting with friends and smoking their electric cigarettes like an arrogant French tart touting for business.

Give me the UK approach to life. If you’re on the road, then you’re fair game. You know where you stand or are about to be knocked over. Unbelievably, it obviously works as you’re 4 times more likely to be killed on US roads than in the UK.

Finally finish off Orange is the New Black – not bad. What to watch next on Netflix is the big decision? Still haven’t found anything worth watching on US TV – now there’s a surprise.

More PC and Non PC:

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Christmas — Considered by many under siege until supporters realized that the  ’holidays’ in ‘happy holidays’ originated from ‘holy days’ and the ‘X’ in Xmas is the Greek letter ‘chi,’ representing the first two letters of Christ.

Prayer — In public the favored word substitute for ‘prayer’  is now ‘thoughts,’ as in ‘keep them in your thoughts and wishes’. 

Misguided Criminals – A BBC commentator attempts to strip away all emotion from the word ‘terrorist’ by using ‘neutral’ descriptions for those who carried out the 7/7 tube bombings.

Master/Slave computer jargon – LA County re-labels computer documentation to remove this alleged slur that has been used for decades describing computer hierarchies.

Riddle me this then?

The religion of peace is sensitive to anything that offends them. Riots, killing, fatwas and take to DSC03074 he streets in protest even over a few cartoons. Yet daily there are atrocities carried out in the name of their religion, if these offend, misrepresents or is against their religion why haven’t they thrown their toys out the pram by now? Why aren’t they out on the streets protesting? Why aren’t they burning terrorist flags and images of jihadists? Why aren’t they bellowing and catawalling in anger from every minaret?

I leave you to your own conclusions, but in my mind as long as the so called “moderate muslims” stand by and say nothing then I know what my conclusion is.

Wednesday – yet another forecast of sun, clouds and 50% chance of rain. Turns out very hot (84F) and very sunny.

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Decide to do the locals thing and get out early for a walk up to the farmers market. After 5 hours; 16,062 steps; 6 miles; 2 coffee stops; 1 ice cream; 4 rests on shaded forms; 8 dress shops; 1 new sun dress;1 close encounter with a tiny snake of unknown venom and a 10 minute stop in the sanctuary of the Marriots air conditioning, we get back home. By now Wendy’s walking slower than a Gopher Tortoise crossing a road covered in treacle and looks and feels like a cabbage that’s been simmered for an hour to make sauerkraut. She really can’t cope with this heat. Moan, moan, moan. Even fantasising about being at home in the cold, pouring rain – must be heat stroke.

Somehow I think we got the timing wrong as walking back in the mid day sun there’s not a local to be seen. Mad dogs and …….

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More PC terms:

A Criminal – unsavory character 

A Crook – morally (ethically) challenged

Abortion – Near-Life Experience 

Alcoholic – Anti-Sobriety Activist

Alive – temporarily metabolically abled.

An Immigrant – a newcomer 

Assassination – involuntary term limitation 

Bald – comb-free, folic ally independent, follicularly challenged.

There is a god after all.

“The long-term unemployed will be required to do community service in return for benefits under a workfare scheme to be introduced next April.”

Fantastic news. Common sense prevails. Has Cameron been reading my rants?

Only sad news is it’s those who have been unemployed for more than 2 years, but it’s a start. They can start reducing it down to a sensible time period like 2 weeks.

 
 
 
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