20170208 – Oh No We Missed The Mountain Lion; Had To Settle For Two Moose.

Wednesday – warm and sunny.

Carol runs us back home and drops Wendy off at the Christian Centre and then we hit the slopes. Have a few runs together and then I get her to enjoy the day rather than sticking with me on the easy slopes. Meet up for coffee.

Wendy on the beach when we met in Newquay all them years ago.

What an awesome day, great weather and plenty of snow, although a bit crunchy. Still sticking with my “get my head back together” plan and enjoying the easy and flattering runs. A real confidence boost today. Skiings coming back together and so is fitness as I manage whole runs with no stops and no burnout. Very tempted to up the anti, but will stick with it for the week, got my 10 planned runs in.

Wow saw a sight rarer than a Mountain Lion sighting, as a scum boarder checked behind him before setting off. Amazing. Good job none of his mates saw him letting the side down. There’s hope yet.

Having a locker is great. No longer have to lug those heavy planks of wood up, but also have a comfortable locker room to change in.

After skiing walk down to the Christian Centre to pick Wendy up and walk home. She’s bought a bag of toys for all of $5. They weigh a ton as I lug them back home, like a knackered pack horse donkey, hotter than two hampsters farting in a wool sock in my artic gear, sweltering in the sun.

Lazy evening trying to stay awake.
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More crazy Utah laws

It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon.

Birds have the right of way on all highways.

A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.

It is a felony to persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway.

Alcohol may not be sold during an emergency.

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Love him or hate him. Agree or disagree with him. One of the 52% for Brexit or the minority’s against it. Either way, surely you have to admit that Nigel Farage has helped achieve a momentous change in English history.

So why hasn’t he been made a lord? Especially when you consider all the corrupt, greedy, brown nosing arseholes and septic boils on the backside of humanity that have. It’s simple really, he just doesn’t fit in with the existing politically correct bunch of wimps, frightened of their own shadow and terrified to say what they really think. Just watch them on Question Time as they shit themselves when asked an awkward question and try and weasel out of it.

Shame on the political establishment.

Thursday – warm and cloudy.

Well my weight loss is going great. I won’t call it a diet as I’m eating normal and assisting the American wine industry. In just under 1 weeks lazy skiing I’ve lost 4lbs. Once I get in full swing skiing I’ll have to be careful walking over sewer grates in case I fall through. Perhaps need to increase the wine intake to slow down weight loss!

View from our balcony.

Lazy start to the day.

It’s 44F, like skiing on a slush puppy – spring skiing. Hard work. Don’t like. Just manage 5 runs before throwing my toys out the pram and going home. Mind you at least with 10 weeks here you can afford to be picky – did I really just say that? Where’s the obsessive, must ski all day every day me gone?
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Theresa May faces defeat in the House of Lords over the right of foreign nationals, from other European Union countries, to live and work in Britain after Brexit.

Those who arrived before the EU referendum last summer would be able to stay under an amendment to the article 50 bill tabled by the Liberal Democrats who are confident that they have the cross-party alliance needed to get it through.

What is it with lefty liberal multicultural appeasement monkeys, and middle class bed wetters, that can’t understand even the basics of negotiation. What a cracking idea, grant EU nationals the right to remain, proves how what liberal, bleeding heart, caring do gooders we are, and then the EU can stuff the Brits living in the EU, use them as a bargaining chip in the negotiations.

Anyone who votes for this should be exterminated. If this passes then we should abolish the house of Lords and ensure all liberal MP’s are committed to a loony ward.

What planet are these fools on?

Friday – driving snow.

Bloody hell it’s raining down here. Not doing the snow any good. Need fewer therms.

In Newquay when we were young and first met.

On my daily commute there’s some awesome wildlife as two Moose are just loitering around outside Jans on a busy corner. Alas no Mountain Lion sighting. Who knows perhaps the Bear will be back this year.

Still being slightly stupid when it comes to skiing, I set off for a few runs. At least it’s not a white out but the driving snow means it serious goggle skiing. They don’t have any wipers so visibility is confusing and it’s so warm that we’re still skiing on a giant slush puppy. After a few runs, enough to get me another “Stupid Skier” pin, common sense kicks in and I quit. Good news is despite my gear being drenched I’m cocooned in a warm dry shell thanks to my 10 year old jacket and new ski pants.

Spat me vitals, another days skiing compromised, feeling like a Dalek whose plan to conquer the world was frustrated by a staircase.

Call off at Starbucks to try another of their reserve coffees and buy a bag for home.

Wendy’s volunteering at the hospital. I very kindly meet her off the bus and we travel home together. Lazy afternoon and evening. Catch up on some UK TV.

Meanwhile feeling like banging my head against a wall as I try to understand how Trump’s Immigration ban has violated the constitution. It seems that there’s enough muddied waters to make a whole anti-trump parade of millionaire lawyers. I’d always thought having a written constitution, unlike ours based on past precedent, would make life easier and clearer.

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Peter Kay – Gypsys

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Just love the free bus system around here. It’s amazing. But no wonder this country has an excess adipose tissue problem. The bus stops are about every 10 feet so that the poor dears don’t have to walk too far.

Today took the blobby biscuit as 3 young lads had waited for the bus to ride just one stop rather than walk. I bet they’re the same ones who wait an age for a lift to go down just one flight. I wonder whether they just sit on the lift up and then down, rather than bothering to expend any energy skiing.

At this rate I think there’s a real danger Americans will evolve to be legless.

Saturday – cool and sunny.

Wow 13″ of the good stuff overnight. The World looks a heavenly place this morning – paradise.

Those gorgeous ski runs.

Set off to see Angela race on Nascar. Never seen lift queues like it. Takes me 45 minutes just to get to the top of Payday, and thats using the singles line. Angela bombs down Nascar, great little skier.

Snow pretty good but tough skiing with all that fresh powder. Very busy, frighteningly so in places. Too busy, too many queues, too many people. Spoils it.

Walk down to Chase and then meet Wendy at supermarket – well where else would you expect to find her.

Hal and Carol come round for dinner as Angela’s having her first sleep over and they’re unsure whether she’ll stay.
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Truck of Peace: New Year’s Resolution

Sunday – cool and sunny.

First really bluebird days since we’ve been here.

View from our back deck.

Up and out early to get Anna and Leon sorted with ski hire. Then a great days skiing. It nice and cold and they had 3″ of new snow overnight so the snows in pretty good, squeaky, condition.

I quit just after lunch time as Jere and Diana picked us up and took us to the Park City Mountain Sports Club (PCMSC) apres ski. It’s a bring an appetiser and own booze do at Bobs home. What massive awesome home they have. He has an amazing collection of baskets and Indian pottery. Finally get to pay our club dues, all of $25 a year. Money well spent. Have a great afternoon with plenty of nice food and much chit chat about skiing. Trump’s kept out of the polite conversation.
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America in all its big, brash, grand and excessive glory. Don’t we just love it. And not a nipple in site, but I’m sure there’s enough naked flesh to piss off the Muslim fundamentalists.

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Computer Sayings
Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all.

The attention span of a computer is only as long as its power cord.

I had a life once. Now I have a computer.

The most overlooked advantage to owning a computer is that if they foul up, there’s no law against whacking them around a little.

Do files get embarrassed when they’re unzipped?

Monday – cool and sunny.

Up early for another great days skiing with Anna and Leon.

Bus stop on a very cold day.

Hal picks us up and takes us up to the mountain so we can use 6 of his buddy passes. What awesome friends we have.

Snows still in pretty good condition although some runs are a bit icy.

Meet up with Wendy for lunch and butties at PC base. Then I quit and make our way home, via the liquor store – need wine.
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Wiped out by an out of control SCUMBOARDER. Why do they allow these crazy, dangerous (they can only see one side), careless scrots on the mountain?

Wiped out by crazy scumboarder.

Wendy’s been taken out twice by these vermin and stoped skiing because of them.

While Trump’s got his pen out perhaps he could issue an executive order to deal with them. Here’s a few suggestions:

1 Scumboarders should, wherever possible, be confined to their own mountains where they can do the gene pool a favour by wiping themselves out.

2 Scumboarders should have to pay double as they are clearly a safety hazard, due to their blind side.

3 Scumboarders should have to go to the back of any queue until such time as ALL skiers have been loaded on the lift.

4 Scumboarders should never be allowed to ride on the same chair as a skier, they are a liability when unloading.

5 Scumboarders should not be allowed to undo one foot to deal with flat sections.

6 Scumboarders are totally incapable of looking behind them before setting off, so if they fall or stop they should be made to take their board off and walk the rest of the way down. This will also discourage them from taking a infestation (collective noun for a group of scumboarders) siesta across the middle of the slopes.

7 Scumboarders should be made to quote the skiers code, word perfect, before being sold a ticket.

8 Scumboarders who violate the skiers code should have their pass confiscated.

9 Scumboarders who crash into a skier should be banned for life. Their boards should be confiscated and turned into firewood or seats. If they crash into another scumboarder that’s ok. It will help reduce gene pool pollution and improve evolution.

10 Scumboarders who travel at more than 5 mph should have their pass confiscated.

11 Scumboarders equipment should have a 100% sales tax.

12 Scumboarders should not be allowed on the slopes on weekends or national holidays.

13 Scumboarders should have wing mirrors fitted to their compulsory helmets so that they can see their blind side.

Rant over. Good news is I’ve survived with just a bruise and learnt that I can fall without breaking anything.

Tuesday – cool and sunny.

Lazy start to the day. I don’t get up there until 11:00, letting the snow soften up.

Valentines day wishes.

Hals out on the mountain and gives me a ring to hook up (learnt that in my teach yourself American course). We meet up and I drag his skiing down to my level. Have a great morning skiing with him, he helps me regain some of the confidence I lost thanks to that crazy scumboarder yesterday.

Coffee on the beach outside Campos, enjoying the sun and putting the World to rights. What an awesome day; what awesome skiing; what an awesome life.

Drop my skis off for waxing. Don’t you just love it when people tell you they don’t need them sharpening, just waxing, even though they’ll get less revenue. Cole Sports, a no rip off shop.

Join Wendy, somewhat belatedly, for Tipsy Tuesday. Pass on the Margarhetas, a girls drink, but commit a sin and have a well deserved beer. Great free Nachos and Salsa.

National Ability Centre send out an urgent request for volunteers, I nip along and volunteer to do guiding from Sunday. They’re a great organisation and do such great job, they really do deserve support.
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Greatest George Carlin Quotes

The man who once said “life is worth losing” is dead. But his quotes live on. In no particular order here are his 101 best…

I don’t have pet peeves — I have major psychotic fucking hatreds!

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!

A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.

Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?

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Pat Condell just dropped a truth bomb: