20160620 – Rammed By An Italian Exhaust Bandit, Pisa, Lucca, San Gimignano And Not Forgetting The Referendum

Tuesday – hot and sunny

Wendy goes for a paddle.

Wendy goes for a paddle.

Lazy day around the villa.
 
Our villa.

Our villa.

Don’t I just love Italian design? I thought they were meant to be the world leaders in design. From our experience I think not. A toilet roll holder that can’t hold a full toilet roll; a toilet designed by toilet brush salesmen; cups that big you can wash your feet in; roads and roundabouts so confusing it gives you a headache comprehending them.

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Wednesday – hot and sunny

DSC_0301Drove up to Pisa. Well you have to go and see it. But as our son said it’s a one tower, and of course a Duomo, town. If it hadn’t been for a relaxing coffee I think we’d have left in 30 minutes.

From a EU obsessed with Health and Safety I’m gob smacked that there aren’t barriers around the leaning side in case it falls down.

Pisa

Pisa

Have to say though free parking, even if there were no signs indicating a car park, and good 1 Euro bus service – we walked – does make it one of the most tourist friendly and accessible towns.

Driving out of Pisa and some Italian exhaust bandit finally manages to get up my exhaust pipe as she rams into me as we’re setting off from a junction. Fortunately and amazingly, there seems no apparent external damage. Bumper seems to have done it’s job without disintegrating or even cracking. Insist on her insurance detail just in case and photograph everything including FEMALE driver. Whiplash, whiplash, whiplash goes the cry – worth at least £3,000 each.

Lucca

Lucca

Then we’re off to Lucca. Told this is a not a place to miss. Pass on the suggestion of cycling around the very formidable town wall – it’s 90F. Stop for lunch which consists of ice creams, it’s so hot. Then we saunter through town, slithering from one patch of shade to the next, like a pair of vampires trying to avoid any direct sunlight.

It has a church, plaza and amphitheatre thingy with street cafes around it. Not all that impressed. It came highly recommended by another of those “Italy’s oh so wonderful”, get up your nose snobby aficionados.

Lucia old amphitheatre

Lucca old amphitheatre

After a busy days driving sat enjoying the benefits of a few quality Reinheitsgebots in the shade on our patio.

Met a group of 9 Brits who were on a cruise. Interesting they all in favour of BREXIT but sadly were that thick they’d assumed they’d got an internet vote. No real idea how they were going to do this internet vote. 9 BREXIT votes lost through stupidity.
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Thursday – hot and sunny

Wendy with yet another ice cream.

Wendy with yet another ice cream.

Oh it ain’t half hot so we have a lazy day around and in the pool.

Put out to pasture each day and kids come and bring them in at night - joy.

Put out to pasture each day and kids come and bring them in at night – joy.

Brief trip out to a local supermarket. Just like France no concept of customer service, too busy chatting to their buddies, probably about how good sex was last night.
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San Gimignano

San Gimignano

Germans give us better EU terms.

Dear Brits,
If you stay in the EU…
* …Even we will acknowledge the Wembley goal!
* …We will stop making jokes about Prince Charles’s ears!
* …We will no longer use sunscreen at the beach – in solidarity with your sunburns!
* …We will do without our goalkeeper for the next round of penalties, for more excitement!
* …We will introduce tea breaks by the bucket!
* …We will voluntarily provide the bad guy for any James Bond movie!
* …We will immediately turns our clocks back one hour!
* …We will introduce an EU directive banning foam on beer!

A bit of cheese. Awesome smell.

A bit of cheese. Awesome smell.

* …We will reserve the hotel sunloungers for you with our towels in the morning!
* …Jogi Löw (manager of the German national football team) will guard your crown jewels!
* …We will all attend the Queen’s 100th birthday!

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San Gimignano

San Gimignano

You’re sauntering around town in the sweltering heat and constantly pestered by black (statement of fact not racist) street sellers. You try to swat them away like a swarm of mosquitos, but to no avail. I wonder whether we can buy a repellent spray in the chemist.

Their marketing and sales techniques are abysmal.

Do I look like I need a fake Gucci handbag?

Why would I want a pair of sunglasses when I’m already wearing prescription sunglasses?

Here I am with 20lbs of Nikon camera breaking my back and they want to sell me a Smart phone selfie stick.


Friday – hot and sunny

San Gimignano - Wendy at the well.

San Gimignano – Wendy at the well.

Bit of a sleepless night as I follow the referendum results. BBC’s lack of a sensible prediction or swingometer is appalling. The graph / slider seems meaningless.

San Gimignano

San Gimignano

Get to about 02:00 and despite earlier polls it seems obvious to me that there is a groundswell in favour of BREXIT. Time for some more kip.

Wake up again around 04:00, don’t I just love my old mate insomnia, and finally seems the BBC has been brave enough to make a prediction. By 05:00 it’s looking good, so back to sleep.

By 08:00 it’s a done deal. It’s our 1776 moment and we managed it without Adams and Jefferson, certainly wouldn’t compare Farage, Boris and Gove to those intellectual giants. WE’VE ESCAPED THE EVIL UNION.

Wow the suns still risen; an asteroids not struck; there’s no plague of frogs; our little lizards are still eating flies and ants on the patio; no horsemen of the apocalypse have yet been seen; Internet connection is still crap.

Another gargoyle that would give an adult nightmares, never mind a kid.

Another gargoyle that would give an adult nightmares, never mind a kid.

Breakfast and off out for a 2nd attempt to visit San Gimignano, lovely hilltop town full of towers. Apparently some middle ages competition to see who could build the tallest. The Manhattan of Italy.

Good job we got here around 10:00 as the car parks are nearly full to gunnels, like Britain and it’s immigrants.

Now that's a pizza.

Now that’s a pizza.

It’s a lovely relaxing town, but oh so hot, so we’re dodging from shade to shade again. Coffee stop and then Wendy has an ice cream stop – the best she’s ever tasted. One of the nicest little towns we’ve visited. By 12:00 we’re exhausted with the heat and head for home.

Lazy afternoon around and in the pool. Wendy hides in the cool of the house.

Well the retribution, whining and nastiness has begun. All us BREXITers are a bunch of racist xenophobic idiots. Us oldies, who haven’t got long to live, had no right voting out when the vast majority of the youngsters wanted to remain. Buggered up their future! Yet they were that passionate about remaining only 25% of them could be bothered to come off their Smart phones to vote. Tough. Democracy in action.

Meanwhile the bruised remainders are signing a petition for another referendum. Let’s keep doing it until they grind us all down and they get the right result.

Back at the villa

Back at the villa

In the evening our American neighbours come around and ask if we’d like to join them, help them finish of an excess of pizza. We pop round and have a pleasant time with them putting the World to rights; helping them understand the Evil Union from our perspective; discovering their perspective on Trump. Typical friendly Americans.

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What is it with ties. Not one of the people on the EU Referendum programme knew how to tie a tie properly. They all had those sloppy, sloping knots.

Is it some upper class elite snobbery? It certainly makes them look like frayed bedraggled bachelors with no wife to dress them properly in the morning.

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And finally my comment on all this acrimony that has now ensued following the referendum: