20121013 – Blue Mountains

Saturday – Cool but sunny.

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We’re off up to Katoomba – no it’s not an African Village – the main tourist town in the Blue Mountains. Forecast is for sun but only 15C. For the first time since we left Belthorn I’m in long pants, complete with extra layers on top and my mountain jacket. I’ve always had a yearning to visit the Blue Mountains and an even bigger yearning to ski up there – alas there’s no ski resorts up there.

It’s only about 60 miles, but the Sydney suburbs are a nightmare, made even worse by more traffic lights than graffiti on a funny door. At each one you can die of old age. Worse than Tucson. Get some roundabouts! 

Try to park in Katoomba but it is not very tourist friendly, amazing when you consider it’s probably the biggest attraction in the Blue Mountains and the major source of income.

Yesterday it was snowing up here. People were marooned up here.

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Encounter what can best be described as backpacker aborigines – can’t say Abos it’s just not PC. These were young and very, very pale white although dressed and painted like Aborigines – man’s got to earn a crust.

Drive out to Echo Point; pay their rip off parking fees; visit the tourist info marketing extravaganza; go with all the Orientals and photograph the 3 Sisters – see pictures. Have an exotic lunch in the park and then drive around the cliff edge. Find some stunning look outs with much better views, free parking and pleasant places to sit and have a picnic. Brings back home the age old adage “The best things in life are free”. Awesome views.

Meanwhile some useless information. Why are the Blue Mountains blue?

The mountains and valleys are smothered in a blue haze that is produced by an effect called Rayleigh Scattering – named after Lord Raleigh an English physicist. It’s explanation of the blue haze is that the suns rays fall on dust particles and moisture in the air and so produce the colour blue. Well that’s all well and good but why aren’t all mountains blue? Apparently in the Blue Mountains, the abundance of eucalyptus trees mean there are also droplets of oil, and this, apparently intensifies the effect. Hence the name, the Blue Mountains.

 

ImageAfter visiting the many vantage points we set off back. Call in at the food court in the Mall to pick up something for dinner. 

Meanwhile, as promised, I’m doing my bit for free speech and to desensitise these religious savages, the fundamentalists, yes you know who you are. Meet Muhammad, he lives around our pool and on a sunny day comes out to bask in the sun. On a really hot day he’s even been known to have a swim. If my blog had an International following, instead of a measly 3 (still look on the positive side that’s a 50% growth up on last year), I suppose some fruitcakes would throw their toys out of the pram; start a riot; demand I’m stoned to death on the steps of Blackburn Town hall; issue a Fatawa thingy, that’ll send me into hiding for the rest of my days; hold violent demonstrations in Blackburn’s cultural quarter – that’s an oxymoron if ever there was one. 

But perhaps their is hope for religion after all:

Malala Yousufzai Shooting: Islamic Scholars Condemn Taliban Attack

Two days after a Taliban-orchestrated attack on teen activist, Malala Yousafzai, triggered an uproar in Pakistan, more than 50 Islamic Scholars from the ‘Sunni Ittehad Council’ condemned the incident as unacceptable.

 

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Just like a two year old it would seem that our Lorikeets get more food on their face than in their mouth. 

Here’s an Ozzie Red Neck test.

There’s a bloody good chance you’re a redneck if;

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.

3. Your property has been mistaken for a recycling center.

 

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4. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

5. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

6. You think the Nutcracker is something you do off the high dive.

7. The Salvation Army declines your mattress.

8. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.

9. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don’t want it.

10. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

11. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.DSCF6457

12. Your grandmother has “Ammo” on her Christmas list.

13. You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.

14. You’ve bathed with flea and tick soap.

15. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

16. You have used a rag for a gas cap.

17. Your house doesn’t have curtains but your truck does.

18. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

19. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made It.

20. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

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21. You have a complete set of salad bowls, and they all say Mc Donalds on the side.

22. You’ve used your ironing board as a buffet table.

23. You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart.

24. Your neighbors think you’re a detective because a cop always brings you home.

25. You’ve used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.

26. You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

27. You have used one of the following pickup lines on a sheila;

Did you fart? cuz you just blew me away.

Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special.

My Love fer you is like diarrhea . I can’t hold it in.

Do you have a library card? cuz I’d like to sign you out

Is there a mirror in yer pants? cuz I can see myself in em.

If you was a tree & I was a Squirrel, I’d store my nuts in yer hole.
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You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty’s only a light switch away.

I know I’m not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon..

Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up.

Finally you’re probably wondering why there’s a photo of a car park. Well if you look carefully you’ll see little coloured lights over every parking bay. Green = vacant; red = occupied; blue = handicap slot free. There’s signs up directing you to how many free slots per row – really neat. Look down the row and you can easily see the free bays.


 

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