Monthly Archives: October 2016

20161016 – Indian Canyons; Bump Into Home Exchange Friends From Australia; Casinos

Sunday – hot and sunny.

Outdoor dining.

Outdoor dining.

Lazy day as the paleo-rockers are swarming for yet another concert this evening. Bald heads with withered pony tales and a surfeit of adipose tissue everywhere. Fortunately this weekend they seem to have turned the volume down so we’re not kept awake by them.

Tootle off down to Starbucks for my caffeine and internet fix.

They’re all there doing there homework, complete with MacBooks and Apple EarPods, even Mum and daughter. I can’t help noticing, probably because I’m nosey, that none of them, from the 8 year old to those in their mid twenties and thirties, use joined up writing. They’re raising generations that have no awareness of the world outside America; they’re not street wise, thanks to being Molly coddled by the yellow bus; they can’t even breath without EarPods and music in their ears; they can’t spell; they can’t even use joined up writing – I wonder how they go on with their signature.

Spend the afternoon deleting and editing 100’s of awesome Joshua Tree pictures.

Boy it’s hot again.

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When the Ruby Tuesday’s where Kevan Finley worked at was shut down, he wasn’t able to find another job in the area – so he continued being a cook at another branch 9 miles away from his home.

The source of America's blobby problem.

The source of America’s blobby problem.

Since Kevan didn’t have a car, however, he had to walk, 6 days a week.

His new co-workers at the restaurant in Mentor, Ohio didn’t find out about his strenuous trek until about three months after he had started working there.

Kevan supposedly has a sunny, cheerful attitude and never complains about his circumstances, so the staff decided to surprise him with the gift that he deserved.

The workers started driving him home while they were secretly raising money through a Go Fund Me campaign to buy the 30-year-old cook a car. In just 17 days, the restaurant raised over $8,000 for the dedicated man.

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Campaign Jokes

Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants? Because E.T. eventually went home!

What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common? They both whine alot!

What’s the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan? If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.

Why can’t you compare Donald Trump to cancer? Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.

What’s the difference between Donald Trump and a sewage plant? Nothing they’re both full of shit!.

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A California Starbucks Experience

For any serious Internet use I have to nip to the local Starbucks, it’s a tough life.

Flowering cactus.

Flowering cactus.

The other day I went in they were showing 3 different coffees ready brewed. “Ah I’m sorry but we only have the Pike Place on. The other two we only brew in the morning”. Well that’s like spreading grease on my surfboard of life. I can’t resist with the comment “Well why don’t you take the other two coffee signs down to avoid confusion?”. He looks at me as If I’m a Dalek from another planet. Stupidity 15 : Common Sense 0.

Never mind I’ll have a pour over. No you won’t because they don’t have the two coffees I choose. Oh well I’ll have to settle for the Pike Place. At this point he exceeds all my expectations and gives it me for free. Obviously he either feels sorry for a poor old deranged Victor or, much less likely, thinks my suggestion has merit.

It was school escape time so there’s a steady torrent of youngsters coming in and ordering exotic and expensive drinks. They all have two things in common. Their drinks have a mountain of cream on top of a calorie and cholesterol special drink, and yes you’ve probably guessed it, they’re all blobbies, waddling their excess adipose tissue in and waddling out again with their next excess pound of adipose clutched in hand.

Today when I went in you’d think they were giving it away. They’re queuing right up to door, and bear in mind this is a slow process and they don’t rush.

Have the same discussion on the 3 coffees advertised as available yet only one. This time it’s a victory, she takes 2 of the adverts down. Stupidity 0 : common sense 15. And to top it all she gives me a very large free coffee. Result.

Monday – hot and sunny.

Lazy morning and then we set off to explore Salton sea an inland sea – I thought they called them lakes.

Disabled dog in supermarket.

Disabled dog in supermarket.

Don’t ever bother. Salton sea beach is the most desolate habitabed place on earth. Just desert and trailers. Must be an Indian reservation it’s so bleak. A basic guide to identify Indian reservation land – “Is it worthless, inhabitable and so desolate that not even an ebola virus would want it”. If the answer to all 3 is a resounding yes, then Uncle Sam probably gave it to the Indians in trade for the paradise they called home. Oh and if it has a giant casino in the middle of nowhere then it’s certainly an Indian reservation. Still at least Uncle SAMs given up on practising eugenics on Indian women.

Never mind says I, aboard my optimistic virtual surfboard, we’ll go down to Salton City. Sounds rather grand. I wonder what the cathedral’s like? It’s the same sprawling desert with a few houses, more up-market than trailers, dotted around. More roads than homes. Oh, and it does have a motel and a cafe. Don’t bother. Why would anyone want to live there. You could turn it into an open prison and they’d all want to escape.

Supermarket and home!

Trump’s Mrs gives an interview. What a tasty piece of eye candy – Trump locker room talk. She comes across as calm, rational, coherent, intelligent and a good speaker. Not a bit like her husband.

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Really struggled today to find anything for my wave of life. Then, like a mote in this giant cosmos, I suddenly saw all these dust motes floating in the sunlight. They danced and hovered, beautiful. Not something we see much of in England, as it requires sunshine. Memo to Wendy, all these motes had come off my hanky, perhaps a change of washing regime is called for?

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Truck of Peace; best part of my day:

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08:30 enjoying coffee and orange juice out on the patio after breakfast. It’s about the only time you can enjoy the weather without ending up wetter than a water hogs arse, it’s hotter than the Devils armpit. We’re treated to a Belagio style water fountain display as they water the golf course – I wonder whether it’s raw sewage water, no doubt improve our immune system as it wafts over to us. My this coffee tastes good.

Well since I’ve given up on Fox and MSNBC at least the crazy repetitive voices have stopped. It’s just the same bile over and over again.

As to the campaigns. Well why bother with policies and solutions when there’s scurrilous scandal to be had. It seems that every American woman over 40 has suddenly remembered she’s been groped or better still raped by Trump over 20 years ago. Mass long term amnesia, yet after all that time they can recall minute details. Does anyone actually believe them? Does anyone actually care? To add fuel to the fire Trump then points out that these women are too ugly to have bothered with. Some of them would certainly scare a rat off a cheesecake.

When in a hole stop digging.

As for Hilary I’m surprised she ever got any work done given the multitude of emails involved. Then there’s all the bribery allegations. She’d need a major accounting firm to keep track of it all. But the media do seem to give her an easier time and ignore some of the hard scandals and lawlessness.

God help the American people. You really couldn’t make it up. It’s like the worse possible horror comedy series – House of Cards on steroids rewritten by Lewis Carol. How do you choose between these two turnips. All you can do is choose the “lesser of two evils”.

Tuesday – hot and sunny.

Bugger the customers who pay your wages!

Bugger the customers who pay your wages!

Drive down to Tahquitz – sounds like the name of southern softie stock broker who was bullied at public school – Canyon. An Indian canyon. Well first signs are not good. Employee parking only near the visitor centre, customers down the hill. $12 each and not much to it. Pass.

Drive down to Indian Canyons – there are more of these places than Starbucks. They’re only $7 for us geriatrics and there’s 3 canyons and a trading store. Splash out.

Have a our grand cox’s pipin picnic and a stroll around Palm canyon. Then go and walk up Andreas Canyon. Wow there’s even a flowing stream here in the desert, rarer than a Taliban girls college.

Andreas Canyon hike.

Andreas Canyon hike.

Call in for a leisurely Starbucks and Internet on the way home.

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Defenders of the French language have always been keen to protect it from the scourge of English infiltration.

Unfortunately, they have lost a key battle. In a move that would have Robespierre rotating in his grave, one of France’s most esteemed universities has announced that it will teach courses in English for the first time.

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Campaign Jokes

Palm Canyon home exchange offering!

Palm Canyon home exchange offering!

Republicans: “Hillary won’t win without blacks, Hispanics, gays or Jews.” Democrats: “Or as we like to call them: Americans”

Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning? She wants to be the first lady.

What do Monica and the Carolina Panthers have in common? They both blew it.

Did you hear about the 11th Commandment Hilary Clinton introduced? Thou shall not expose thy rod to thy staff.

What did Bill Clinton say to Monica Lewinsky? I told you to lick my erection, not wreck my election.

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Bill Maher on Muslim’s – Part 1:

Wednesday – hot and sunny.

Palm canyon.

Palm canyon.

Meet up a Starbucks for a coffee with Rudi and Gaynor, home exchangers from Melbourne. It’s amazing how our paths have crossed. We did a home exchange with them about 5 years ago. As we were travelling through Hong Kong back to England, they were travelling through back to Australia so we met up for dinner – yummy snake. Now they’re just 5 miles down the road on a home exchange in La Quinta.

In the evening we go out for dinner with Rudi and Gaynor. An excellent all you can eat dinner at the local casino and reasonably priced with cheap wine – my sort of place. After dinner we go people watching in the casino. All very entertaining with these giant machines that require you to have an advanced degree in Human Computer Interfaces just to put money in. I give Wendy $0.83 to invest, but she doesn’t bother. Probably because there are no poor people’s money consumption machines.

Palm canyon.

Palm canyon.

The media’s all hyped up for tonight’s final presidential campaign debate. Just 3 weeks to go. Plots, leaks, lies, accusations and slagging one another off. It’s just unbelievable how vile it is. A sad reflection on American society, but you only have to watch the adverts on TV – difficult not to, easier to dodge a incoming asteroid – to realise how uncritical they’re becoming. Your average advert seems to be aimed at an 8 year old who’s had a lobotomy.

Adverts for pharmaceuticals have to be the most diabolical on American TV. 10 seconds telling you how to cure dry skin if you suffer from diabetes and then 2 minutes warning you about all the dire side effects that may well even kill you. Stick with the dry skin.

The most unbelievable product has to be Act tablets for dry mouth. Have they forgot what water is? Then you’ve got Probiotic for kids and dry skin cream for diabetics.

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DeepMind is now capable of teaching itself based on information it already possesses.

Andreas canyon

Andreas canyon

In a significant step forward for artificial intelligence, Alphabet’s hybrid system — called a Differential Neural Computer (DNC) — uses the existing data storage capacity of conventional computers while pairing it with smart AI and a neural net capable of quickly parsing it.

The two examples given by the DeepMind team further clear up the process:
1. After being told about relationships in a family tree, the DNC was able to figure out additional connections on its own all while optimizing its memory to find the information more quickly in future searches.
2. The system was given the basics of the London Underground public transportation system and immediately went to work finding additional routes and the complicated relationship between routes on its own.
Instead of having to learn every possible outcome to find a solution, DeepMind can derive an answer from prior experience, unearthing the answer from its internal memory rather than from outside conditioning and programming.

Depending on the point of view, this could be a serious turn of events for ever-smarter AI that might one day be capable of thinking and learning as humans do.

Or, it might be time to start making plans for survival post-Skynet.

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Mightily appropriate in view of the current pantomine of “Lesser Of Two Evils”.

The End Of America is Near George Carlin ✪ Blow Your Mind ✪

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Palm canyon.

Palm canyon.

Starbucks has an older clientele in the mornings, predominantly Homo-waddlingblobieus ready to gobble and slurp up their daily intake of a spray cream mountain atop their calorie infested beverage – some of these drinks contain more calories than a full meal and represent 25% of recommended daily requirement.

20161012 – Joshua Tree National Park

Wednesday – hot and sunny.

Joshua Tree NP

Joshua Tree NP

Up and out early. Exciting day, off to the Joshua Tree National Park, just 30 minutes down the road.

Well the Joshua Trees are ok, but the rock formations are spectacular. Perhaps they should rename it Awesome Rocks NP. Turns out that may well be necessary as the Joshua Tree is threatened with extinction, due to climate change, and may well have died off by the end of this century. It’s not really a tree but a Yucca and only grows at elevations between 1,300 and 5,000 feet. What’s really narking me is why does it only grow in this altitude range? Well apparently it won’t grow above 5,000 feet because of snow and frost damage, but I can’t find out anywhere why it won’t grow below 1,300 feet.

Another awesome 7 hour NP day. I’ll now have to spend weeks culling 100’s of pictures of rocks, but well worth it, and free with our NP pass.

Skull rock.

Skull rock.

In order to maintain a sense of balance in this pantomime of an election campaign I’ve decided that on odd days I’ll watch Fox News and on even days I’ll watch MSNBC. Day 1 of the crazy voices from Fox. Will I survive MSNBC tonight? For newspapers I’m reading Wall Street Journal and New York Times.

Perhaps I should just watch reruns of the Magic Roundabout – time for bed said Zebedee.
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Another awesome day. This time we’re in Joshua Tree NP. How fortunate can we be to be able to explore these awesome National Parks. It’s the centennial year of the NP, thanks for “Americas Best Idea”.

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Computer sayings

My all time favourite:

If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilisation.

But they are useless. They can only give you answers. ~Pablo Picasso, about computers

Joshua Tree NP

Joshua Tree NP

Computers have lots of memory but no imagination.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

As network administrator I can take down the network with one keystroke. It’s just like being a doctor but without getting gooky stuff on my paws.

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it’s done.

Thursday – hot and sunny.

Kurt’s birthday, 32, where do the years go?

Joshua Tree NP

Joshua Tree NP

Lazy morning and a trip to Starbucks.

After lunch we drive down to Palm Springs to see what all the fuss is about. Well it’s a vary pleasant town with the centre being full of restaurants, clothes shops and “don’t need, but if brain dead, might want” shops.

It’s that hot that most of the restaurants have mist sprays to keep their outside clients cool. We have similar in Belthorn, it comes naturally and is called rain.

Call in at a supermarket, joy, for the weekly shop. Beer section has the usual parade of nats urine but not a decent beer, even Pilsner Urquel, in sight.

Who's the boyfriend. Watch out Trump may be about looking for some ass.

Who’s the boyfriend. Watch out Trump may be about looking for some ass.


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Our patio - best experienced at 04:00 in the morning.

Our patio – best experienced at 04:00 in the morning.

The award of the Nobel prize for literature to Bob Dylan is not just a long overdue recognition of one of the world’s finest lyrical poets.

It represents a cultural sea change: an understanding that entertainment can also carry intellectual and emotional meaning, that popular music is a genuine art form, that the Nobel prize need not be awarded to obscure litterateurs you have never heard of, and that opera is not the only way to blend words and music into sublime meaning.

It is a sign that the times they are a-changin’.

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Joshua Tree NP

Joshua Tree NP

Hells bells and set fire to it. I spend all this money on an eCopy of the times and what’s the best headline they come up with today “Tesco takes Marmite off the shelves”. I ask you who gives a shite? Less than 20% of the population are stupid enough to shop at Tesco and of them how many buy Marmite anyway. The Middle East is a basket case, Irans a nightmare, Islam is at war with the west, Germany is plundering Europe, the pounds being hammered, we’ve not yet escaped the EU and Americas playing out the greatest pantomime on earth, with the worst two possible candidates for President that you can imagine. Meanwhile we’re concerned about Marmite. I despair.

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Is Islam a religion of peace? A very reasoned article:

Friday – hot and sunny.

Well it’s a repeat of the big concert tonight through Sunday so we’ve decided to keep a low profile and have a couple of lazy days to avoid the crazy people and their gridlock. Who knows with Bob Dylan being a Noble Laureate there may be even more of the crazy people.

Palm Springs

Palm Springs

After much digging it seems like the best theory on why the Joshua tree does not grow below 1,300 feet is down to lack of moisture – rainfall and transpiration at lower levels. That also seems to be the reason that alpine trees only grow above a certain altitude.

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Joshua Tree NP

Joshua Tree NP

LON­DON—Jonathan Dunne, a 42-year-old from Col­orado, set off for Covent Gar­den tube sta­tion Fri­day with a posse of helpers, many of whom he had met through Face­book. Af­ter be­ing pub­licly ridiculed in the worst pos­si­ble way the first time around, he was more de­ter­mined than ever to re­al­ize his dream.

A week ear­lier, the Amer­i­can ex­pat, a health-ed­u­ca­tion worker, handed out a batch of 500 badges em­bossed with the words “Tube Chat?” at an East Lon­don sub­way sta­tion—a bid to help spark con­ver­sa­tion among the Un­der­ground’s ul­tra-re­served pas­sen­gers. Things didn’t go the way he hoped.

Sadly he stands no chance with the Southern softies.

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Given the two jester clowns in the greatest pantomime on earth (USA Election Campaign) unraveling before our very eyes, it seems appropriate to have some awful jokes about them. Ladies first:


Bad hair day

Bad hair day

Why is Monica Lewinsky not voting for Clinton? Because the last Clinton left a bad taste in her mouth.

Why is Hillary Clinton running for President? Because it’s easier than running from Law Enforcement.

Why should conservatives vote for Hillary? Because a woman’s place is in the (White) House.

Why does Hillary prefer dogs to Bill Clinton? A dog chases his own tail 

Why shouldn’t Republicans worry about losing in 2016? Apparently depression is covered by Obamacare.

What was Hillary Clinton’s last gift to Monica? Spot remover.

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Joshua Tree NP

Joshua Tree NP

Well that’s two nights of Fox and two nights of MSNBC. I’ve lost the will to live. It’s like they’re in two different universes with completely different sets of reality – perhaps the multi-verse theory has some merit after all. I’m giving up on balance with this election and climbing off my virtual surf board, a blind man on stilts on a surfboard stands more chance of maintaining balance.

I give thanks to my retirement commandment “No daytime TV”.

From now on it’s either the Magic Roundabout or pornography – no chance here in Puritan land.

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Fairy Tales and Fables – The Quran

If Allah is a supreme being, creator of the universe and all that codswallop, how come he lets satan mess with his messenger. Initially Muhammad praised and confirmed the existence of three goddesses, worshipped by pagans, by confirming their ability to intercede before Allah. This caused the pagans to bow in worship and also praise Muhammad for speaking highly of their idols. Later Muhammad, the messenger of a Allah, claimed that his statements were not from God but from Satan who caused him to slip! So how come a supreme being couldn’t suppress such cross channel interference.

And this is what sparked off Muslim spitting their Fatwas out because someone had the temerity to write about it with the “Satanic Verses”. Bring it on they desperately need to man up and thicken their skins.

Saturday – hot and sunny.

Hair of sorts.

Hair of sorts.

Lazy morning and then for lunch we have a drive down to La Quinta village. All very swish, but not really much to it. Wendy spots a Trader Joes and a Lidl, so like a couple of intrepid trolley spotters we explore – how sad is that.

Wendy lunches at Panera Bread. Then back home to the secret entrance to our gated community, manned by one TSA reject, but at least there’s no queue. With all the bald pony tale crazies (Dylan fans) around it can take upwards of half an hour to penetrate our ultra secure gated community – who knows what they’re protecting us from is it Paleo-BanTheBombers, flea infested rag headed jihadis or Trumpkins.

Watch Captain Philips in the evening, followed by Poldark and an aged Question Time with some gobby American wench, God only knows why we ever granted her citizenship. It really is about time David got a grip. Raw sewage buckets poised over heads could help them engage brain before gobs.

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The other day I got to see one of the new Teslas. Wow. Great looks; awesome interior; self drive; screen bigger than an iPad Pro; 0 to 60 in under 3 seconds. Best of all energy efficient.

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Now Trumps turn, plenty of material here:

La Quinta village green

La Quinta village green

What is Donald Trump telling Independents? Orange Is The New Black.

Fear is the Path to the dark side. Fear leads to Anger, Anger leads to Hate, and Hate leads to the Republican Nomination.

Why shouldn’t Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants? Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!

Trump: “Foreign Policy?, if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee.”

If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have? The Trump Card

What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly? Hair Force One!

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Views from a sensible Muslim. Yes they do exist:

Posted by Dr. Estella Sneider on Freitag, 18. Dezember 2015